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View Full Version : The stuff you can't decide on parting with



pinkytoe
7-22-16, 12:52pm
We are down to the basic pieces of furniture to be moved. A while back I bought a corner china cabinet with curved glass doors for $95. It is still available and retails for $899.
The stuff in it has been sold and I don't have a future use for it nor do I want the hassle of moving it. DH on the other hand keeps saying how beautiful it is and how little we paid for it and that we should keep it. He has finally agreed with me to get rid of it but not happy with decision. I have a buyer offering $150. Movers are coming in five days. What would you do?

iris lilies
7-22-16, 1:08pm
I dont know how you and you husband view ownership of furnitre, and
I dont know how invested he is in this decision. I dont consider a china caninent a basic piece of furniture, I would get rid of it if yo dont love it or want it.

In my house, the pieces I buy are mine to dispose of. While he might moan and groan about money lost, he doesnt really get to say if we keep them.

Our dining room table is jointly loved by both of us, so I would not get rid of it without his agreement.

other furniture is his exclusively and I have no jurisdiction over it.

pinkytoe
7-22-16, 1:17pm
That's interesting. We have always jointly decided on furniture so I never thought about it as proprietary. It isn't a basic piece at all, you're right there...so I think it's gonna disappear:)

Teacher Terry
7-22-16, 5:42pm
I would take the offer. Once furniture is used even for a day it is not worth much.

freshstart
7-22-16, 7:59pm
it's a great offer

pinkytoe
7-22-16, 9:53pm
A young couple just came and bought it and were thrilled at their "find". So interesting to me the lives that our stuff goes in and out of.

ToomuchStuff
7-23-16, 9:49am
It is sold, so it doesn't matter now. How far are you moving and what would the cost have been, then take that and compare to what you can find a cabinet for at that location, via Youtube. (don't forget to add for risk of breaking the cabinet) I would think that with the additional (did you have something YOU were planning on using it for, or are you planning on living in it) comment might get the point across.

pinkytoe
7-24-16, 11:40am
There is the invisible "value" of stuff to contend with too - its emotional pull. It turns out to be the hardest part to deal with. I have decided the best way to look at it is the value it brings to its next recipient. That is how I am viewing the sale of our house. The young family will move in and their kids will climb the once sapling trees I planted years ago. In reality, none of us own anything.

razz
7-24-16, 11:57am
Wise and thoughtful observation that will help a lot. I had to learn that the hard way as well.


There is the invisible "value" of stuff to contend with too - its emotional pull. It turns out to be the hardest part to deal with. I have decided the best way to look at it is the value it brings to its next recipient. That is how I am viewing the sale of our house. The young family will move in and their kids will climb the once sapling trees I planted years ago. In reality, none of us own anything.

ctg492
7-24-16, 3:24pm
I am glad a young couple gave it a new home.

I had a small mixing bowl I brought home from mom's stuff. It had no value probably about 60 years old. The only value it had was my memories as it was mine when I was very little to mix in the kitchen with. SO I parted ways and son took it last week. I told myself you will never use it, it will sit in the cupboard. I went over to his house last week and there was my bowl of memories filled with water for their little dog:( Son and DIL had no idea my memories of this silly little bowl. At least it is getting used I suppose.

nswef
7-24-16, 10:18pm
And the doggie LOVES it too.

iris lilies
7-24-16, 10:23pm
I am glad a young couple gave it a new home.

I had a small mixing bowl I brought home from mom's stuff. It had no value probably about 60 years old. The only value it had was my memories as it was mine when I was very little to mix in the kitchen with. SO I parted ways and son took it last week. I told myself you will never use it, it will sit in the cupboard. I went over to his house last week and there was my bowl of memories filled with water for their little dog:( Son and DIL had no idea my memories of this silly little bowl. At least it is getting used I suppose.
Hey, it is being used by your grandchild-equivilent.who better?

SiouzQ.
7-26-16, 10:13am
Oh dear, now I am getting to the hard part about stuff. I've been putting off dealing with my jacket and boot collection (not THAT big, but still). It was easy to get rid of an ugly grey men's Columbia winter jacket with a zip-out fleece inner jacket after wearing it for 5 or 6 years, it was, well, very ugly to me. Boom, gone! But now I turn to my carefully curated other coat and jacket collection, pretty much procured at various thrift stores throughout the years:

It makes sense to keep my buff colored sheepskin jacket that I bought for $9 at the Kiwanis sale. It is very warm and is very south-west.

My black motorcycle jacket (in my exact size) that an old neighbor left outside the dumpster when she moved. I don't ride motorcycles, but I sure looks good on me. Probably should keep it, you never know in my new life out in the desert. So right now there is two very bulky garments.

A beautiful black velvet embroidered car coat my best friend gave me for X-mas a couple of years back. Looks sublime on me, and fits with my whole artist-in-the-desert theme. It's actually fairly warm. I haven't had much of a chance to wear it being a grungy wage-slave at Wholefoods. Keep.

Three various colored denim and cordoroy jean-type jackets, great for knocking around in. Handy, but three? I can't decide on my favorite, because they all fit and look good....

And here is the kicker - out of all these options, the one I SHOULD get rid of is a ratty old brown leather car coat that the lining has been ripped to shreds, the pockets are blown out, etc. And I feel pangs even thinking about tossing it. I even looked into getting the lining replaced and the seamtress looked at me like I was crazy to even think about spending the money on doing something like that. I need to remember that there are A LOT of leather jackets out there in the thrift world and that I have gotten a good run with this particular one, probably paid all of $5 for it. But it has such a nice, worn patina to it...

Then there are the boots and shoes: so, my old brown harness boots go wherever I do, so of course they're in the box. I have a pair of vintage 1960's Justin cowboy boots that I got in Taos about ten years ago. They feel kind of funny when I wore them doing the musician thing many years ago, but they are beautiful and look really cool, and since I AM moving out west, it seems like I should keep them. However, I haven't really worn them for a few years, not since I worked at the guitar store and I haven't even tried to see if they fit after I broke my big toe last summer. I don't think I can get rid of them, so I'll take them.

A new pair of burgundy red Dansko clogs that I got last fall because none of my shoes really fit after I got out of the walking cast. Expensive, but I haven't had much opportunity to wear them, either. Hmmmm....

And then there are the various sport shoes, all of which I use and need to keep: Keen Sandles, Merrell Hikers, running shoes, flip-flops...

What I WILL get rid of: fifteen year old four inch high black strappy sandles that go with my little black cocktail dress (my go-to outfit for dressing-up for the last 15 years). I'm going to keep the dress, but loose the shoes. I wore them to my niece's wedding last year and they kill my feet. However, they are pretty nice-looking, but I don't envision myself needing them any time soon.

The coat and boot box is getting heavy. And then, where am I going to store all this stuff when I get there? I don't even have a closet!!!!!!!!

JaneV2.0
7-26-16, 10:43am
I don't have an adequate closet in my bedroom; I use an industrial clothing rack. I have a (thrifted) jacket collection too, so I feel your pain. You can always find a pair of strappy shoes, so those can go. You might need a little trailer for your boots and heavy jackets; you can always donate them when you get there, if you change your mind... ;)

Tammy
7-26-16, 12:58pm
Try each item on.

Does it feel 100% comfortable? If not don't move it with you.

Look at it in the mirror while you wear it. Does it look good I every way? Does it appear worn out? Don't take it with you if those two criteria are not met.

Those two tests should eliminate a few things.

If you get past the emotion and go straight for the comfortable fit and nice appearance, you will then be moving things that you will actually use.

freshstart
7-26-16, 4:43pm
I would never give up the velvet embroidered coat. I've seen clothing racks on the site Choxi for cheap and if you sign up for email you get a $10 coupon and free ship.

SiouzQ.
7-26-16, 5:28pm
I actually found a small garment rack last week when I was walking around the neighborhood, someone else is moving and they had put it by the dumpster. I took it home and took it apart (it's small enough to transport easily) and cleaned it up. I'm just not sure how much room there is going to be to set it up in my new tiny house.

It will be interesting to see what out of the items I have chosen to take with me, how many I will have to get rid of when I get there because I will have no room to store or display them...

razz
7-26-16, 6:53pm
SQ, can you ship some of the absolute treasures to your new address instead of taking them with you? Boots and coats won't break or get damaged too easily so should ship parcel post or whatever type of service is available.



I actually found a small garment rack last week when I was walking around the neighborhood, someone else is moving and they had put it by the dumpster. I took it home and took it apart (it's small enough to transport easily) and cleaned it up. I'm just not sure how much room there is going to be to set it up in my new tiny house.

It will be interesting to see what out of the items I have chosen to take with me, how many I will have to get rid of when I get there because I will have no room to store or display them...

SiouzQ.
7-26-16, 10:26pm
The thing is, I'll have room to take them, but I'm not sure there is going to be room to have them in my tiny place! I'm definitely going to look into under-bed storage!

pony mom
7-26-16, 10:49pm
The leather jacket that is falling apart, can you use a large piece of it for something else? A former coworker used a thrift store leather coat to cover an ottoman. Cover a pillow? A leathercrafter can make something else out of it for you, like a small purse or wallet.

Use the best bits for something new and get rid of the rest.

ctg492
7-27-16, 6:15am
King Blankets, I can not toss them. They are expensive but so hard to clean and with dogs I wash way to often. I end up with a pile. Last year I took a few to goodwill. Yesterday I looked at a brown quilted blanket and sighed. Then It hit me, I spent an hour making dog blankets out of it!

Yes that little bowl I mentioned the grand pup uses. You are correct went to a good cause and now I see it every day I go take the little dog out while son is at work. I never saw that bowl that much in my life!

ToomuchStuff
7-29-16, 12:31am
This thread has me thinking about something I have debated about getting rid of. A piece of the Berlin wall.
This came up in the last couple of weeks, because someone I know, started on about how they were in Germany, and went to Brandonburg AFB in Germany, and then to the "world bowl" that the Chiefs were in. I laughed and said I remembered it from another perspective, because the a friend/member of the organization brought several of use back, pieces of the wall when the team went to go chip off some.

Part of me thinks keep it, while part makes me think next of kin will not have a clue and wonder why do I have a piece of concrete.

Teacher Terry
7-29-16, 12:38am
people buy anything. Maybe you can sell the piece of the wall on ebay:))

SiouzQ.
7-29-16, 8:56am
I could see how if you were an east German who actually was there when the wall fell and chipped it away with your own hands that you would want to keep a memento of such an important event. For others, it would just be a piece of historical curiosity, and they would find value in owning a piece of history, even if they weren't there themselves.

All this reminded of one memento that I keep that NO ONE else would ever understand, but for some reason I have placed a lot of value on - it is a rock. Not just any rock, but a piece of red ore-type rock that my daughter picked up at a Copper Harbor, MI Beach when she was around 11 years old and put into the middle console of our Ford Escort Wagon. I have put it in the middle console of every single car I have owned after that, because it is her rock. By now has taken on a huge significance over the years. I have no idea why, but I have placed a tremendous amount of emotional value upon a simple rock. It is a neat rock though, I like how it absorbs the heat and fits into the palm of my hand so nicely. When I hold it I think of the day she put it there when I am out on my long drives. To anyone else, they would see it and toss it away, but I can't do that! It's HER rock!

beckyliz
7-29-16, 6:12pm
I put special rocks like that in a fairy garden I set up this year.

ToomuchStuff
7-31-16, 1:55am
I put special rocks like that in a fairy garden I set up this year.


Not a bad idea. I should probably just put or bury it in the yard somewhere. Heck, Truman has been on the property, so it would be fitting. And maybe someone would dig it up some day, like I dug up some childhood toys, or an old pistol that was axed, after it went off in the house, years back.

jp1
7-31-16, 10:17pm
Yes that little bowl I mentioned the grand pup uses. You are correct went to a good cause and now I see it every day I go take the little dog out while son is at work. I never saw that bowl that much in my life!

I'm so glad that you've made peace with that. Of course my view of pet bowls might be a bit skewed by personal experience. Our cats eat out of handmade pottery bowls that my sister-in-law made for them. Customized with a C in one (for Christian) and an E in the other (for Everett). Every time I dump a scoop of kibble in them I think of DSIL and think how sweet it was of her to make them. The cats, on the other hand, couldn't care less about the quality of the bowls. Much more important to them is the quantity of kibble. They'd probably be fine if I just dumped a big pile of it on the floor...