View Full Version : Penniless parenting.
I loved the sounds of this one, particularly because of the close relationship we all have (and share) with one another related to saving, being thrifty, living simply and frugally, and being environmentally friendly and conscious.
What are some of your penniless parenting areas you seen to fruition in your home?
can you give an example of what you mean?
As my kids are transitioning into adult hood I look back and see many things I wish I could have done differently. The two things that DH and I agree we would keep the same is that we read to our kids - A LOT - and we ate dinner together seated at the table most nights of the week where we had conversation.
So, my favorite penniless parenting tips are libraries and family dinners. I suppose, technically, family dinners aren't penniless since you have to buy the food, but the dinners do not have to be haute cuisine.
I love nature. Birdwatching, tree and flower identification, etc. That can be so much fun for kids!
You can make your own play dough for pennies and that's alot of fun sculpting things too.
Going out after dark and watching the stars/comets is alot of fun.
Making a campfire and roasting marshmallows/hot dogs (for a few pennies). You don't even have to have food......just talk and laugh and tell stories.
My kids and I spent alot of time talking. I liked to talk to them about the various problems/interactions they had at school and what was the best way to handle them.
The kids loved writing plays and then performing them for DH and I. They were hysterical!
We had a cheap kids' musical instrument set and they loved playing those things and making up songs.
they would gather all their stuffed animals together and have make-believe parties. They would put on silly clothes and make their own hats.
Play charades.
DS loved making forts out of our old science boards and blankets.
The kids and I always had a sit-down breakfast before school and always had dinners together.
Gardenarian
8-29-11, 4:31pm
Most of the things dd is engaged in are free or extremely low cost (e.g. swimming at the town pool.)
The things that I have found that were worth spending money on for kids:
A really good holistic dentist (and for my kid, a good orthodontist too. With her genetic background, strong teeth are unlikely.)
Organic foods whenever possible.
Taking the income cut so that we were able to homeschool (dh and I both work part-time.)
Pets can be expensive, but kids learn so much from them, and dd's dog has been good for her in so many ways.
We have done little traveling in the past few years, but we do plan an international trip in 2012 or 2013. I think this is an important piece of her education.
Zoebird. Just as an example, I remember putting on backyard picnics for my kids. I'd lay out a large quilt or blanket and then prepare simple little things for them, like a tray of cold cuts along with chips and pop, and maybe something special like some baked goods to go along with everything. They loved that and it never failed to keep them happy and content.
Anne Lee. Family dinners are by far one of my very favourite penniless parenting things. I love the bonding time they foster, not to mention, dinner is never rushed. We all talk, laugh, and share stories. Sitting down together as an entire family is so important to me.
CathyA. Great list. You touch on so many I remember as a young child myself. Charades and dress-up/costume wearing were two of my favourites. I don't think there's a kid around that doesn't get lost in an imaginary world (and life) when it comes to make-believe. Simple thrift store purchases help bolster kids dress-up, because there's always something that can be found among all the riches that helps create the magic.
To add (additionally), old-fashioned basics such as breastfeeding, cloth diapering, etc, are also welcome contributors to the whole idea behind penniless parenting. Every little bit helps.
Gardenarian. Just noticed your entry after posting mine. Great list, too. In you mentioning homeschooling I thought of my own situation, and how I was always able (and fortunate enough) to stay-at-home with my kids. Not much in the way of babysitters (other than for special occasions). So true about spending additional monies in certain areas to make for a better, more solid family structure. I'm all for that and in fact, from everything I have observed related to such, it ends up being one of the best investments parents can make. The long-term side of it always seems to offset the overall initial expense, while the outcome proves to be worth its weight in gold.
This is a great thread Mrs M!
My mom was a preschool teacher so I learned how to have all kinds of fun for cheap.
-Crafts from recycled materials. The possibilities here are endless. Sock puppets from old socks, pop bottle or milk carton boats, milk jug skeletons for halloween, scrap sculptures, egg carton caterpillars, the much-loved Pet Rock Village with cardboard box houses, toilet paper roll slides and a popsicle stick church, a water magnifier made from a cup, a rubber band and some plastic wrap....I could go on for days. www.familyfun.go.com has great ideas. Currently we are using a Costco yogurt box for a cat bed for stuffed kittens.
-Homemade playdough and regular old cookie cutters (can be used for real cookies when washed too)
-Play kitchen. I bought a nice wood one for $20 at a thrift store. I did buy some $10 IKEA pots and pans, but the food was all either homemade or just packages of real food that had been used up and cleaned out. I crocheted them some bacon, eggs, pancakes, tomato slices and lettuce slices and knit them some cheese and bread. Later that year I made a pink scarf and Cheyenne asked me "Mommy, are you knitting me some ham?" :) I got them a metal tea kettle at the thrift store for $2 and my mom got them some dishes. Anyway that thing gets daily use.
-Mini outdoor sandbox. I got a $10 rubbermaid under-the-bed box with a lid and filled it with play sand. The lid can go on when it isn't in use.
-Play silks. I bought a couple of silks at Dharma Trading company for, I think, $5 and dyed them with kool aid. Then, at a garage sale, I found a few lengths of sparkly but soft fabric in pink, blue and green. That stuff gets used for everything. Sometimes the green cloth is grass for the dollhouse or My Little Ponies, sometimes it is a mermaid tail and the playsilk is the mermaid top. Sometimes they are superhero capes, sometimes the blue one is the ocean. They have been bridal veils, blankets for babies and walls for a fort.
-Handmade headbands. I used scrap fabric from skirts I made the girls to make very simple, tie-on headbands. Not only are they used as headbands, but they are sometimes used as belts for the kids or leashes for stuffed animals or to tie things together or as bandages when they pretend someone is injured.
-Salt dough for Christmas ornaments or just for making sculptures.
-Homemade popsicles
-Rolling down hills. Hours of fun! Totally free!
-Related to rolling down hills, you can make coffee can ice cream in the winter by rolling it repeatedly down a snowy hill. Good for getting the squirrels out of children too.
-Related to coffee can ice cream, we sometimes make snow ice cream with freshly fallen snow and a can of sweetened condensed milk.
-Pancake art. Colour pancake batter different colours, put them in squeeze bottles and make whatever you want. These were pancakes we made to look like cheeseburgers.
http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y60/cheyennesmommy/hamburgerpancakes.jpg
There's always the beach.
http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y60/cheyennesmommy/aug2011029.jpg
-Bubbles
-Nature crafts. Fairy houses out of sticks, acorn jack-o-lanterns, seed paper greeting cards and stuff like that.
Another site that has good frugal ideas for kids is this one. http://www.frugalfamilyfunblog.com/
ah, i see. most of my life. :D
we take 2-3 meals together as a family, which is awesome. we are at the beach and hiking a lot. we build with blocks and color, and use a lot of found objects for that too (wood sticks, planks, etc, rocks, old bricks, shells, etc). we go to the playground often.
i'm looking into homeschooling; not sure how i feel about it (whether or not i have the ability to properly meet his social needs if i do it), and of course, there is an expense in it as well, which i'll have to budget.
anyway, there are more. i'll have to think about it. :D
Birthday parties at home instead of at some place that charges $10-20/kid. Real food, real fun in a real place.
Packing lunches along on long days. I have an insulated backpack that makes it easy to carry lunch for all of us when we go to the zoo, a museum, or on a long bike ride. Picnics are a lot more fun than most restaurants.
Taking water bottles with us everywhere.
Instant, temporary playhouse: tent in the backyard.
Using the local parks instead of buying a huge playset for the yard. Walking or biking to the parks.
Homemade kits for pretend play. Look around to find things to make a veterinarian kit, office worker kit, nature explorer kit, etc.
Stella. I love the picture of your kids at the beach, and the pancakes, oh my word! Now that's as kid as it gets! I admire the richness you possess in the creative department. You should have your own TV show. It could be called- An Hour With Stella! It would be such a hit. Nevertheless, a superb list! So many wonderful ideas.
Zoebird. Love your creativity using natural things! I'd venture to say that there are many kids today that don't get to enjoy that side of creative living, and that's sad. I remember (as a kid) how dad would take all us kids to a big open gravel-pit, and with a couple of large cardboard boxes in tow, we kids would slide for hours down the steep gravel slopes while riding inside the boxes. Simple things like that are unheard of today.
Rosemary. I love your style, too. You take so much pride in being the best you can be, and it reflects so brightly in the way you write and tell and do. Lovely post. I cherish packing an all out picnic lunch and heading off to the beach. Once there, I love the challenge of searching out the perfect shady, cool spot under a tree, setting up camp, and laying back and enjoying life while forgetting about all things trivial. Penniless activities and adventures are the best.
i also thought that i would clarify that we do 2-3 family meals per day. It's quite nice. :D
Seeing family meals through (together) each day is so nice. I feel such strength and closeness when we gather together as one big family. Such a warm feeling I get when it comes to the sharing and enjoying part.
Today, I was feeling really frustrated about my mothering.
DH and I had decided in July to have a little party for DS -- a pot luck at our local park. We would provide meatballs (gluten, egg, and dairy free), and then others were marked to bring veggies, fruit, and the cake (i can't bake to save my life. LOL). I thought it would be simple and fun for the kids, and as a rain option, it could be at our house.
But, work being what it was, I just never got the email out in time. By the time I did, no one could come. THen, I asked when would be a good time, and of course, no one could attend at the same times. it was thoroughly frustrating! So, i talked to DH and just said I was disappointed in myself for waiting so long.
Today, DH asked if i'd picked a date for DS's party and emailed everyone. I hadn't, but I got snippy with him about it.
Of all the moms I know, i'm the only working mother. I work full-time plus, maintain the home, and care for DS 6 hrs a day in the AM, and then a full day on friday. DH also works FT, and watches DS for 6 hrs a day, but doesn't have an all day like I do. Honestly, a lot of things like this "slip through" because I just can't be bothered to try and organize it. And without a car, getting to play dates is really tough UNLESS the other mother is willing to meet us "in town" somewhere. Some are, and some aren't.
So, DH says to me -- and this is what set me off -- I don't see how mattie (one of DS's friends) can have a party, and lenny (another friend) can have a party, and amelie can have a party, and sol can have a party, but hawk can't! He said it in this way that, to me, said "why didn't you get your **** together like these other moms?"
and I said -- I'm sure I could be a much better mom if -- like ALL Of those moms, I didn't work. All of those kids have activities: dance, music, art, soccer, swimming lessons, plus play dates and either kindy or play group. None of the mother's work. They care for their homes, they take their children to activities and play dates in the AMs, and in the afternoons, their kids still nap! They make dinner for their families, and have a restful evening at home. I'm sure they have all of their stresses, but most of them have only one child (some have two, but with a 6 yr age difference). And, nearly all of them have partners who are either well established in their careers (eg, own two homes) or on a trust fund (such that he can work for free as a deacon while he works on getting into seminary to become a minister). Many of these women also have day care when they want or need it (drop in day care is expensive!), and so on.
The fact is, they have plenty of time while the kid is in swimming lessons to figure out when to have a party, what to have, and get the text messages out to invite everyone. I can't even get my own work done in a timely fashion, and i'm happy to make sure that we are all fed and that the house is clean as well. the idea of planning a party and making it work is. . .overwhelming.
In addition, because of my work (both at home and at work), I simply cannot take DS to so many activities. Likewise, I can't afford them either. Art classes are $250 per 10 wk session. Swimming lessons are $100. Soccer is $100. The kindy is $250 (i do pay for this). I can really only afford one, and honestly, we can't really afford that -- and so I make payments which helps. I really want him to go to this kindy, because it's good for all of us (it's steiner, and since we are anthroposophical, it helps us get into the community).
I have been asked by the kindy to "help out." I asked what they want/need that I could do. They asked me to do laundry. I told them it wasn't possible. It's too much work and we don't have a large enough clothes line (we don't) to even manage our clothes, let alone 40 or so towels -- not to mention lugging them home on the bus. They asked me to craft. Not only do I not know how to craft, the crafting group (where I could learn) is on the other side of town (two buses -- or 1 hr and 15 min ride one way for 1 hr of crafting) and at odd times (evenings at 7 or mornings at 9 -- neither is feasible). I asked if there is anything that I could do from home or from work. They wanted me to help organize the fundraiser, but once I got the list of things that i could do to help -- which was effectively event planning -- i told them that it simply isn't possible with my work load. It just isn't. They are kind of put out because "you are on the payment plan" and so i should be "pitching in more." And they asked me to volunteer AT the kindy while DS is there -- but I work during those hours (teaching classes).
We are not poor. Honestly. I love my life. But, we are on a strict budget. I live minimally out of choice, of course, but also out of frugal need. We do not overspend (except, perhaps on good food -- which we make ourselves, we just like good ingredients!), and we watch every penny coming in and going out.
I just felt horrible today, because -- unlike nearly every mother I know -- i simply cannot give over the way others do. The other moms at the kindy meet at the crafting group once a week. Their kids go to kindy, as well as at least one -- if not more -- other activities. There is usually a play date or two as well. They make things for bake sales, they plan out fabulous little parties, and overall, they do all of the things that -- sometimes -- i wish I could.
I feel bad that my son's party passed us by. But I am not unhappy with how we celebrated his birthday. We took him to see African Cats, and had cake and ginger ale. He was over the moon for it, and when we sang happy birthday to him in the cafe, the people around us joined in. He was quite happy to play with the little girls there, and it certainly didn't cost us anything we hadn't budgeted!
I take him to the beach nearly every day, wherein we make "sculptures" as my son calls them. We collect rocks, shells, sticks, and seaweed, make piles of sand and decorate them together. DS also takes a lot of photographs with my camera (which, btw, are more beautiful than mine, i can tell you.). We also do a lot of drawing with side walk chalk. To me, this is a penniless art class, and we are spending time together.
I can't afford soccer, but we go on hikes a lot. there are lots of short little trails around our place, and DS usually chooses among his favorites. on our hiking day, we can go on the hike of his choice, but on daddy's hiking day, they go on an "adventure" -- DH plans the route, and out they go. He is definitely fit.
I can't afford swimming lessons, nor to even go to the pool right now, but when the water is warm, we'll start taking him swimming in the waters here. We got the info that the bay to the left of us is warmer than the bay to the right, so that will help. I think learning to swim in open water would be good for him. And he's rather fearless about it. :) So, I will be doing that with him fairly soon (when the weather changes). I don't think there's any reason why I couldn't teach him.
I also teach him to play the ukulele, using an online school -- which is something we both enjoy, and it doesn't cost us anything extra. I'm also learning the uke, so bonus for me. :) We already owned the ukulele, btw. :)
My husband did apologize for putting on the pressure. He knows that I work hard and have a lot of work to do, and he knows that while he spends most of his time with DS playing (reheating dinner and then the bed time routine being the only "chores"), I spend the majority of our time together (with DS) cooking and cleaning, with about half and hour to 45 minutes of "play time" (usually sand on the beach, chalk, or ukulele). The only day when i get "more" play time with DS is on Fridays, but that's also our gardening day (something that he also enjoys), and usually the day that I try to get a play date together for Hawk if I can.
I think I do ok. But these days, i feel "bad" that I can't really keep up with the SAHM with seemingly unlimited income -- particularly when they invite us to things that cost money (eg, join them at the zoo, or the pool, or the indoor play ground -- all of which cost $10 per kid and $15 per adult).
I feel bad for you Zoebird. I know what you're going through and how hard it is to be all you can be, but take comfort in knowing a majority of us regular ordinary moms are in the exact same place as you. We just do what we can- when we can, and we do the best we can, everything else that follows is out of our control.
This year has been a challenging one for us, as we had a couple of back-to-back hits at the start of the year and to date, we've been scratching away to get back on the up-and-up again and it's been an extraordinarily slow and painful climb.
But there's one thing I've learned about all this, that being, stay focused, and don't allow yourself to cave. The old saying- "tomorrow will be better" always seems to ring true for us (and me) after stints and brushes related to setbacks, disappointments, and stalls.
If there's one thing I've learned about parenting (specifically mothering), that is all the give and take involved. It's like a marriage of sorts, a little for me, a little for the other, and if there's anything leftover, that too is divvied and divided up also. But don't be hard on yourself whatever you do. From everything I've read about you and the way you parent, you're a fantastic mom! And, if occasionally we falter or fail in areas we'd like to excel, that just means we didn't get out of the starting gate quick enough, but life is full of races, and where one race passes you by, there's always another race in the works.
So, plan your next strategy, prepare where you can, and that's all you can do. Sometimes we win, sometimes we loose, but at the end of the day all that really matters is, we (us moms), are there for our loved ones. Just doing the best we can is what it's all about, and really, that's all that matters. (Do that, and as far as I'm concerned, you've won the race)!
Wishing you a happy Saturday!
it was nice to have a conversation with DH about these things, and really evaluate what I am doing and how that works out well for us (and of course, DS).
i mean, our coloring, side walk chalk, and sculpting on the beach happens very frequently (nearly daily). he paints at kindy (it's more mess than I can handle! LOL), and so also gets some arts. We also listen to a lot of music -- both live and recorded -- and we play music and learn the ukulele. We also ahve drums, rattles, and a harmonica -- and he is really good at all of those as well. He's a whizz a the harmonica, which is pretty awesome.
he can count, knows many colors, identifies spiders, flowers, and birds of many kinds. he helps me in the garden, and he helps me in the kitchen. He builds with blocks all the time, can do 12-piece puzzles on his own, and desperately wants to work on a 1000 piece one we found at the tip shop (it's an "old time car"). Since it costs a dollar, and i'm planning on going back to get a sweater for myself ($2), i figure we can give it a go! this is, apparently, relatively rare for 3 yr olds.
as i said before, we spend a lot of time hiking and walking around town. the kid can really go -- he's definitely gotten up to more Kms, I would say 7 or so? I know a lot of adults who won't walk that far. LOL and, it's free.
we go to the parks a lot -- plenty of fun playground equipment.
and, i finally realized that what the kindy *really* needs is someone to go in and organize the place. it is *seriously cluttered*. So, i volunteered to do that from 2:30 to 3:30 on mondays. I'm starting in the upstairs rooms, which are mostly "storage" and "offices" just to make them workable. a friend of mine (whose son will be starting in Feb) is a professional organizer, so I'm sure she'll be helping me come that time. I teach from 11-2, and then I can trot over and do an hour of volunteer work and take DS home at 3:30. We'll catch the 4:10 bus home, and be in good shape.
I am feeling better overall, and honestly, my work is *really* picking up. I'm currently teaching 2 private lessons a week as well as seeing another private client once per week, as well as teaching 9 classes and prepping up for the teacher training (currently have only 7 spaces left!), as well as looking at adding 2-4 more beginner classes to see what is what there. just trying to decide really.
Zoebird, first of all, hugs and deep breaths. Cut yourself some slack girlie.
I don't work and I dropped the ball on two birthday parties this year. James, who turned two, just got a cake at home and Bella, who turned six, got an outing and aquarium membership instead. Both were fine with it. Tell your husband to chill. He's three. He won't even remember a birthday party. It's certainly nothing to get bent out of shape over.
Again, he's three. It's extraordinarily easy and cheap to meet the academic needs of a three year old. They really don't need an art class and soccer and swimming lessons. In fact, a lot of early childhood experts believe that over-structured, overly academic activities are inferior to the kind of play you describe doing with your son.
My most cherished penniless parenting, one which kids never grow out of, is the drop-in convo (conversation). Now that my kids are out of the home, I miss those SO MUCH--the weekly/daily telephone convo just does not compare.
What I mean by that is, just those spontaneous conversations/laughs that pop up. I remember sitting on the foyer stair laughing with one son over something related to gardening, but for the life of me, all I can recall is thinking, how cool this is that we are breaking up laughing in hysterics together--I think he was only about 12 at the time. My kids have all inherited DHs innate, wonderful sense of humor, so they have been funny their whole lives--leading my DD to ask when me when she was about 7, "But Mom, if you never had any kids, how would you ever laugh?"
Drop-in convos can take place in hallways, in cars, anywhere. Drop-in convos I had with my own mother took place almost daily--I'd go in her room while she was sitting at her vanity putting on her "face" and I'd sit on her bed and talk with her. With my daughter, I'll offer to put her hair in a french braid and have a drop-in convo then.
When my son now comes home from VT, sometimes we meet each other--I'm on my way to my home office, he's on his way to the coffee maker, and we just start a drop-in convo, and before you know it, we're sitting down and 45 minutes has gone by.
There's nothing like them--
I have to respond to Zoebird, because your post is a page out of my working mother playbook of the past. In fact, tears fell as I read it. I just want to make you feel better--I, too, felt like the neighborhood misfit mom, and at times I felt my kids suffered for it. ALL the other mothers in my neighborhood seemed to be on the same wavelength--heading up school committees, overseeing their kids in the million activities you talked about, keeping perfect homes, just being the typical organized, prototypical MOM.
On the other hand, I was a flock of loose parts, happy to survive another day with working and managing 4 kids and husband. Organization is NOT one of my skills at all. I live by momentary needs, so when I read that your email was sent out a little too late, been there done that, let me tell you! And I even screwed up my kids' GOING to parties sometimes--one time I dropped my son off at the WRONG PARTY--it was at a park, and I dropped him off with total strangers!!! How bad is that??
I also relate to the money thing. All the moms in my neighborhood are typical suburban moms--because of certain issues not relevant here, we never had any money. Never enough. Always scrounging to pay bills. One time I had $11 total to spend on my son's birthday. $11. And you know what? He LOVED all the little things I bought him. I cry thinking of his gratitude, letting me off the hook the way he did. We had a birthday cupcake, and he got to eat it. I didn't have time to make a cake, and I didn't have money to buy one.
The lesson is this--you ARE, by the little information I've gleaned about you from your posts, a marvelous human being and a wonderful mother. Don't let those other mom's be the litmus test for YOU. You dropped the ball on one little birthday--and it didn't even matter to your son. In the grand scheme of things, that is one little tiny drop in the ocean--
One day, you will look at your son and he'll be a wonderful, happy, loving person. You will probably say it was a fluke--because we moms don't give ourselves enough credit and the mistakes we've made loom larger in our minds than the successes. But it won't have been a fluke.
Read my post above--my special moments with my children have nothing to do with money or planning. Today I aspire to be like them. They're bright, funny, loving, caring, intelligent, and productive. They remember a few patches of rough road along the way, but they know we were all in the car together through those rough patches, headed on the same journey
What Stella said.
Plus: I just watched Babies, that adorably cute documentary about the first year of life for a child in the US, in Japan, in Namibia, and one in Mongolia. What struck me most was the intensity of parenting of the US and Japanese mothers, the toys, the classes, the contacts...and the fact that all four babies developed motor skills and language and social skills that looked pretty similar. We are far more biologically driven than socially driven in our earliest years. I am sure you know, Zoebird, that Hawk is getting lots from you and DH that no number of classes could replicate. And that's what those classes are meant to do, really, to make up for the fact that parents don't bring their kids along for daily activities (work, social, spiritual, musical)...at least in my mind. From the movie, I felt pretty bad about the pressure that our social expectations put on parents of young children. I am glad that you are feeling more balanced about what and how you are parenting your son.
Ahh, Catherine, such wisdom! Your post showed up after I posted.
My DH worries that he never has anything to talk about with his 14 year old daughter, who lives with us half the time. Yet last night, after we watched a movie together, she was very wiggly (probably due to the pepsi she drank with her movie) and so he suggested that they go out at eleven at night for a BIKE RIDE...to try out his new bike lights. So I headed to bed and the two of them giggled through lighting up the bikes and rode around for probably close to an hour, across the pedestrian bridge, on the bike path, a bit on the streets, and on home and to bed. That's a freebie that will stick in one young teen's memory banks forever. So maybe he can't come up with topics she'll bite on (he won't discuss nail polish and she won't discuss BOYS) but they do things together. Free things!
i think it is very true -- i know that a lot of the pressure is self imposed, and that one of hawk's favorite activities is riding the bus. seeing as he spends about 1.25 hrs a day doing it, he's quite the trooper. But, the fact is, he loves it. First, he sits on my lap the whole way, which is so nice for me, too! and on our ride we see the beach, go through a tunnel, pass the air port where we see planes take off or land (or prep for take off), go through several round abouts, and DS's favorite -- talking to strangers, particularly seniors. He loves to flirt and chat with anyone over 65. :D And truthfully, they love to chat with him too.
I realize that a car might be easier, and get us to places faster, or whatever. But in reality, i love the humanity of the bus. Today, DS flirted with a man who was raised in an orphanage in germany until he was 9, when he was sent to NZ. Apparently, when homes in europe got overcrowded, they sent them to australia and NZ, because there weren't "enough" kids to keep homes open, but enough money and homes for these children. He was never adopted, and he spoke about what it was to grow up an orphan.
I know DS didn't catch much of the conversation, but he learned a german song from the man -- which he loves -- and he also asked me as we walked to the office before kindy: "How is that man not having a mother?" He did get that the man never had parents. And I said sometimes mothers cannot care for their children, so they give them to other people to care for them. He asked "do the mother's miss their babies?" and I said "yes, they probably do, as much as the babies miss their mothers." And he said "I am lucky. And i have BACON!" (which was part of today's lunch).
It really is the simple things, truly.
Butterfly identification.
Also making a list each year of the birds, butterflies, and wildflowers you see, when you first see them and where you see them. Interesting to compare timing and diversity from year to year.
Card games.
Games that need few props such as hopscotch, hand clapping games, dancing between 2 bamboo sticks, frisbee golf.
Blanket over a folding table for an indoor playhouse/cave.
Wonderful reading! Thank you so much everyone. Great, great posts!!! Will revisit this thread again. (Having a bit of a tough time readjusting my days to the school schedule). I go through it every year.
hawk is into identifying spiders. . .by their webs. he's so crazy observant. He noted two different types of webs in one plant (it was a large plant), and then he saw that the spiders were different. and so he's started going "spider with this web" and "spider with that web" to describe them. And he uses the maori word: pongaweriweri (pon-gah-wear-ee-wear--ee). it's cute.
we celebrated crazy-horse day on monday. it's a special holiday for us. our beloved rabbit, october j, came into our lives on 5 Sept 1997 and died on 5 Sept 2007. he was always poetic. After his death, we realized this unusual circumstance AND discovered that it is also the birthday of His Horse Is Crazy (or Crazy Horse), and so we celebrate that day as a special life/death/life day.
We are weird, i know. we celebrated by having a nice big breakfast, talking about october j, reading the children's book about crazy horse that I have, and then going abut our usual business.
Getting back to the simple heart and soul of living (and parenting) is what's missing in so many family units today. Somehow, plainness and simplicity have been either lost, or cast off to the side and replaced with ostentatious glitter, and that doesn't (at all) represent a strong and stable future for the young and learning, and it definitely doesn't do a thing in relation to adding any sense of solidness to a family structure.
My mom once told me, shortly after the birth of my first baby, "it's not what you spend on your child that they will remember and carry with them, it's the one on one time you give them that they will remember and cherish". So celebrate just as you are (and as you will), for it is those simple celebrations that will resound in your sons life, over and over again. Revisiting him again and again, reminding him of how fortunate he was to have such great and loving parents who were able to look past all things superficial, and provide him with everything beneficial.
I love this thread!
Our financial situation is not great right now and this thread is inspirational and reminds me that my kids would rather have me at home spending time with them then at daycare waiting for me to pick them up!
We LOVE our local library.
Pillow and Blanket Forts
Vegetable Garden and Compost Pile (my 4 yo DD spent half a day finding and picking bugs out of our compost pile - take that you hypersanitized "experts"!:moon:)
Bike rides
family dinners at home
picnics and nature walks
breastfeeding
unschooling (a.k.a.-life learning)
snuggles and naps together
What a neat thread!
A sandbox is a simple thing to make and wonderful for kids.
On a hot day, fill the bathtub with about an inch or two of water for a refreshing splash for little people but stay with them.
Make paper boats or take twigs and drop them over the water from a foot bridge or culvert to see how long they take to come out the other side. Fill a tub with water and let kids make the boats for floating.
Paper airplanes are easy to make and play with in the house or yard.
Granola19 and Razz, awesome additions! Blanket forts and sand boxes are (bar none) the two greatest things on earth when it comes to kids and play. Love the creativeness of your posts!
Gardenarian
9-10-11, 12:33am
Zoebird - I just have to say that I am the only homeschooling mom I know that has an actual job (there are probably others on this forum tho), and I never stopped working when I had dd (took a few weeks off after her birth.) It is a completely different world when you are working, and I think in many ways it gives a kid a more rounded upbringing (well, I would say that, wouldn't I?) But I would feel pretty sad if I tried to compare myself to the homeschool moms who are teaching their kids French, Latin, AND Russian; who go to whole movement workshops with them; who have formed little chamber orchestras for their kids. This is all amazing stuff, but I am more interested in creating a happy life for everyone, and I couldn't live with that kind of pressure.
My dd learned to entertain herself early on, and is still happy playing with mud, trees, sand, rocks. There was never a TV, and I am just not going to be making clay at home and teaching her how to bake and all that. We do spend a lot of time together - way more than most parents and kids - but we have a different kind of relationship, based on mutual respect and high expectations on my part, with guidance rather than discipline. Thank goodness she loves learning and reading and creating, and I'm pretty proud that she likes it for its own sake, and not because I'm pushing her so she can get into an Ivy League college someday.
The worst birthday my dd ever had was when I invited a bunch of girls over for a slumber party. I have felt guilty too about not doing enough in that area but it might not be such a bad thing to keep expectations low. It sounds like your celebration was just right - he was happy, you were happy - where's the problem?
And it fit your budget, and you didn't end up with a pile of toys that will need tending and putting away. Sounds great to me.
Okay, stepping off the soapbox now.
i'm trying to figure out, too, how to meet DS's social needs. most of the activities are in the AM, which is when I keep house, make food, and do work for the office while DS self-entertains (educates). Then, in the afternoons, he's with his father, and that's when they go out to the park, exploring, etc. it would be much easier if the HSing activities were in the afternoons!
And what parent can forget the joy and elation young kids revel in, when supplied with a few large cardboard boxes they can climb in and out of, along with cardboard tubes from wrapping paper ends, so they can sword fight!
There is a great book I have given to two families. 700+ science experiments you can do with things at home. I figure it will spark creativity, knowledge, and family participation without plastic junk. One father told me later he was fascinated by all the ideas in the book.
Neat-o, Sweetana3. Thanks for mentioning it. Sounds like a winner. :)
This is very inspiring to read and I hope to be able to use some of this wisdom when I eventually have my own family. Thank you all!
I'm glad to see this thread revived!
Mrs. M your post reminded me that we just made a cafe out of cardboard boxes. I have a picture somewhere I might post if I get to it. They made an oven out of a large cardboard box and a "drink dispenser" from a smaller box with knobs drawn on it. They put stuff in the drink dispenser and it would give you coffee, juice or tea. Like the native Los Angelenos the big girls are, it was a combination sushi bar and coffee shop. :) They served their little brothers and dolls pretend drinks with twisty straws and felt play food.
The drink dispenser has recently been repurposed as a barn for toy animals.
Another thing we did last week was to roll all of the junk mail ads into tubes and make a marble run with them.
Today we are painting soup cans and decorating them with springs, beads, etc. to make robot pencil cups.
My boys have developed their own fun activity I call "Toddler Smackdown Time" where pretty much daily they wrestle each other until it stops being fun anymore.
It really is amazing how easily entertained little ones can be. Travis (10 months) spent almost an hour this morning experimenting with what toys would or would not fit inside his sister's boot.
When the boys were younger one thing that passed lots of time was racing their hotwheels cars. The way we did it was - I got a piece of vinyl siding and draped it off a table or a recliner or something. Hold the top down with something heavy and let em rip. Depending on the incline we might have to put one of the kids chairs under to keep it a little sturdier. The boys also used to put different things under the straight away to make more bumps. They really had a blast with this.
There are other ways to do it too. You can get hotwheels track at yard sales real cheap. Nail them to a board and go.
Azure, hot wheels cars are great! Older kids are usually more than happy to give them away for free, at least that's how we've gotten ours, and you can make ramps and tracks out of any number of free materials.
Another one the kids are doing this afternoon is sledding. We finally got actual snow!
Mira. Will always be there for you! :)
Stella. Me too! The cardboard cafe sounds charming. Oh, the magic that kids bring to a home...
Azure. Some things never go out of style, dinky cars being one of them!
Such a bummer Re: our tobogganing season. So short-lived, and not many days where the kids got to go.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.