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frugalone
10-28-11, 1:30pm
Please keep your fingers crossed for me, or say some prayers, or whatever!

I had an interview today, and it is the first interview I had in a long time where I didn't feel depressed when I walked out of the organization. It's for a marketing assistant in the hospital where my DSis works. I know I can do the work; the woman who would be my boss seems friendly and cooperative; and I saw smiling faces on the employees.

The only downside so far is I would have to drive on the same highway I hated driving on my last job. It can be hellish during rush hour. It's a two-lane that was built in the 1960s and was never meant to support the amount of traffic it sees now.

So far, so good. I should be hearing from them re: second interview early next week.

Thanks! :)

herbgeek
10-28-11, 2:04pm
Keeping my fingers crossed for you!

loosechickens
10-28-11, 4:54pm
sure will send all good wishes out to the Universe for you......you bet.

razz
10-28-11, 7:23pm
Supportive vibes coming your way!!!

lhamo
10-28-11, 7:26pm
Good luck! HOpe this comes through for you.

lhamo

frugalone
10-28-11, 11:32pm
Thank you so much!

domestic goddess
10-29-11, 3:44am
Good wishes and prayers coming your way.

Marianne
10-29-11, 8:48am
Hang in there and keep us posted!

jania
10-29-11, 11:14am
Best wishes as the interviewing process progresses. Good thoughts are sent your way.

ApatheticNoMore
10-29-11, 1:17pm
Good luck. An interview is a large part of the way there.

Lainey
10-29-11, 10:48pm
Go get 'em!

frugalone
10-30-11, 4:23pm
Thank you, everyone! I hope I will get a call tomorrow or Tuesday.

Float On
10-30-11, 4:34pm
Thinking good thoughts for you!

daisy
10-31-11, 5:44pm
Good luck to you!

EarthSky
10-31-11, 8:33pm
Good luck!!

lizii
11-1-11, 5:48am
Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

frugalone
11-2-11, 12:51am
Well, I have not heard anything yet. Trying not to get discouraged.

frugalone
11-4-11, 3:41pm
It's been a week since the interview, so I called the woman in charge and left a very nice voice mail asking if I was still being considered and confirming my interest. We'll see what happens next, I suppose.

Zoebird
11-4-11, 11:49pm
Hopefully, it's good news.

I remember when I called immigration to hear about our visas. I'd called and was told "don't worry, you'll hear from us within the week." then I didn't hear from them, so I waited another week, and then called them. I discovered then that my immigration officer was on holiday. I asked when she would get back. They told me, and I said I would call back then.

I noted the date and called her back. I learned that she had been let go, and that she'd completely mishandled my case. So, I'd been forwarded to a new officer, who hadn't yet gotten ahold of me because SHE went on holiday when the other woman got/back and was let go! So I asked when she would be back from holiday, and was given the date.

I called -- and this was 5 months after submitting my forms!!! -- and she said that she hadn't even looked at our case yet, but would get back to me in a week.

Thankfully, she did, and told me we needed X, Y, and Z to complete the documents. I sent her those things post haste, and then she said it would be "at least three months."

good lord. luckily, the people from whom we were buying the business started acting up, and immigration gave us a special dispensation at the last minute so that we could buy the business. And, the rest is herstory.

I hope that the HR person is on holiday. :D

gimmethesimplelife
11-5-11, 2:03am
Sending out good wishes to you!!!! Hoping to hear of the end of your unemployment.....Rob

frugalone
11-5-11, 8:56pm
Wow--that's crazy! Reminds me of a Canadian pen pal whose husband emigrated from Scotland. They've been married a couple of years now and apparently his attempts to become a citizen are moving at a snail's pace.

Unfortunately, it's not the HR lady I am waiting to hear from--it's the lady I actually interviews with. She didn't mention anything about a holiday, but you never know: people get sick, emergency projects pop up, etc. Trying to keep my chin up.



Hopefully, it's good news.

I remember when I called immigration to hear about our visas. I'd called and was told "don't worry, you'll hear from us within the week." then I didn't hear from them, so I waited another week, and then called them. I discovered then that my immigration officer was on holiday. I asked when she would get back. They told me, and I said I would call back then.

I noted the date and called her back. I learned that she had been let go, and that she'd completely mishandled my case. So, I'd been forwarded to a new officer, who hadn't yet gotten ahold of me because SHE went on holiday when the other woman got/back and was let go! So I asked when she would be back from holiday, and was given the date.

I called -- and this was 5 months after submitting my forms!!! -- and she said that she hadn't even looked at our case yet, but would get back to me in a week.

Thankfully, she did, and told me we needed X, Y, and Z to complete the documents. I sent her those things post haste, and then she said it would be "at least three months."

good lord. luckily, the people from whom we were buying the business started acting up, and immigration gave us a special dispensation at the last minute so that we could buy the business. And, the rest is herstory.

I hope that the HR person is on holiday. :D

ApatheticNoMore
11-5-11, 11:25pm
Companies delay and delay making hiring decisions, it just seems to be the way things are (the "we really like you and are still quite interested, but we are still going through the rest of the ten million candidates we have for the first round of interviews first" excuse etc.).

frugalone
11-8-11, 2:55am
I had to laugh at the "ten million candidates" thing.

However, another day has passed, and I've heard nothing. I am going to assume I didn't get the job. Every other job for which I've been hired, they got right back in touch with me. Maybe things are different today, but I just have a funny feeling.

I just wish I knew WHY. I seemed like a perfect candidate. There are of course a lot of reasons: nepotism, someone younger that they can pay less, etc. etc.

Zoebird
11-8-11, 4:56am
typically, they hire someone they know. so, it was probably someone 'in network' -- do not worry, you are still perfect.

and hopefully, you'll be back to work soon.

i'm sorry that you (likely) didn't get this job.

flowerseverywhere
11-8-11, 5:33am
I'm sorry. I hope that something comes up soon.

iris lily
11-8-11, 9:15am
I don't understand the "someone younger" comment. When we hire, age has nothing to do with the salary we offer. There is a limited range, and if you are 20 or 40, you get that range.

jania
11-8-11, 9:48am
ladyinblack, I know it can be frustrating to wait. Give it an appropriate time then call and find out. If you were not chosen it is not out of line to thank the person for their time and politely ask what skills they could suggest you work on so the next time you will be successful. And I know it's hard but try, try, try not to take it personally. Best wishes...

frugalone
11-8-11, 3:56pm
Well, folks, the show's over.

I got the rejection letter just now.

I will probably e-mail the interviewer to thank her and ask her if there's any feedback she could give me on my performance. I've done this before; sometimes it works, sometimes you hear nada.

Thank you all for your good wishes. I am going to crawl back into my hole now and lick my wounds.

ApatheticNoMore
11-8-11, 5:10pm
Aw. Most of the jobs I've gotten by the way they took a long time to get back to me. I think I don't sizzle and shine and blow them over, but then they still need an employee and ... :) (also just background checks when they are doing it can take forever, I don't even want to know how extensive they must be, we're certainly not talking government clearance jobs or anything). Just for future reference.

I wanted to see you post and say you got the job here, but unfortunately not to be. :(

Lainey
11-8-11, 8:39pm
Well, folks, the show's over.

I got the rejection letter just now.

I will probably e-mail the interviewer to thank her and ask her if there's any feedback she could give me on my performance. I've done this before; sometimes it works, sometimes you hear nada.

Thank you all for your good wishes. I am going to crawl back into my hole now and lick my wounds.

It's their loss.

Zoebird
11-8-11, 11:13pm
try not to take it personally. in this market, lots of people apply for a single position, and as I said, they usually go with someone "in network."

hopefully, another opportunity will come by quickly!

frugalone
11-9-11, 12:40am
Thank you, everyone, for all your good wishes and comments.

pony mom
11-9-11, 12:40am
Sorry to hear you didn't get the job. I sometimes think that jobs have to be posted even though they have someone lined up for it already.

I didn't get my library assistant job that I really wanted but I'm hopeful that something will come along at the right time. So few jobs open and so many applicants--be confident that the right position will be available to you.

cdttmm
11-9-11, 9:01am
Well, folks, the show's over.

I got the rejection letter just now.

I will probably e-mail the interviewer to thank her and ask her if there's any feedback she could give me on my performance. I've done this before; sometimes it works, sometimes you hear nada.

Thank you all for your good wishes. I am going to crawl back into my hole now and lick my wounds.

I would recommend that you absolutely follow up with the interviewer to thank her and ask for feedback. Sometimes a hiring decision is made and within a matter of days, weeks, or months the person hired has quit or was fired. Depending on the company's hiring practices, they may simply go back to the pool of already interviewed applicants and offer the job to whomever was their second choice as opposed to starting the process from square one. (If you've been that one applicant who followed up even after not being offered the job, then you will likely be remembered as their second choice.) This has happened to me twice so I'm speaking from personal experience!

Miss Cellane
11-9-11, 10:15am
I don't understand the "someone younger" comment. When we hire, age has nothing to do with the salary we offer. There is a limited range, and if you are 20 or 40, you get that range.

In many companies, younger employees are seen to have less experience, and therefore get paid less. Older employees with more experience tend to want salaries commensurate with that experience--so they tend to (or companies think they tend to) want salaries at the top of the range. The more people you can hire at the bottom of the range, the more money you save.

I was once witness to a company laying off all their Level 6 employees in a certain job category, then hiring a bunch of fresh-out-of-college kids for the same job, but at Level 1. The company took a hit in terms of the speed and accuracy and problem-solving abilities of their employees, but they saved a ton of money. Depends on what the priority is for the company. I didn't work for that company--they were one of our vendors. We ended up switching to another vendor, because what used to take a day or two to get done perfectly was starting to take two or three weeks and have a ton of errors.

lhamo
11-10-11, 12:17am
So sorry you didn't get the jobs, ladyinblack and pony mom. I definitely recommend following up politely with the hiring manager to let them know you are interested in future opportunities. I have been the hiring manager a few times, and sometimes my vote didn't win. Or maybe there were two really great candidates, but we could only take one. I always kept the good candidates in mind for future positions, and sometimes even referred other organizations I knew were looking to them. You never know who will become an important part of your network. Making a good impression on someone during the interview process can pay off in ways other than being hired for that specfic job.

lhamo

ApatheticNoMore
11-10-11, 12:35am
In many companies, younger employees are seen to have less experience, and therefore get paid less. Older employees with more experience tend to want salaries commensurate with that experience--so they tend to (or companies think they tend to) want salaries at the top of the range. The more people you can hire at the bottom of the range, the more money you save.

I have a suspicion health care costs also come in. If you are an employer covering say 80% of the health care preimums of your employees your cost will be a lot less with a lower AVERAGE age (and yes that's true no matter how healthy the middle age person you hire is - because insurance pricing always takes age into account and only sometimes takes health into account). So if an employer was a perfect economic automaton just making hiring decisions based on this information, it would tend to lead to only hiring older people when it was absolutely necessary. Actually it is none so absolute of course, and people still hire older workers, but it does bear some resemblence to what is happening.

Anne Lee
11-10-11, 10:11am
So sorry. You have good advice above. Please take extra special care of yourself.

frugalone
11-10-11, 2:32pm
I'm still feeling pretty awful about this. It's not just the rejection (certainly I've been rejected before) but now it really looks like I'm gonna have to cash in my 401(k). I've been in major avoidance mode all week, avoiding my volunteer gig, just staying in and doing my homework for my class tonight. I guess I will e-mail the interviewer today and see what happens.

I never thought of the health care cost thing. Oh man...another card stacked against me.

Gardenarian
11-10-11, 5:59pm
I'm so sorry to hear the news. Do follow up on the interview; I got my current job because I was in 2nd place for the position I applied for, and when they had a sudden opening a couple of weeks later I got the call.
Take care of yourself. ((((hugs)))))

frugalone
11-10-11, 9:47pm
I'm so sorry, too, for your loss. I have tried to get a job as a library assistant several times, but I think I just lack the experience or something. And I always tell them I want to go to library school, too! Oh well...Good luck to you, too.


Sorry to hear you didn't get the job. I sometimes think that jobs have to be posted even though they have someone lined up for it already.

I didn't get my library assistant job that I really wanted but I'm hopeful that something will come along at the right time. So few jobs open and so many applicants--be confident that the right position will be available to you.

gimmethesimplelife
11-10-11, 11:59pm
Well, folks, the show's over.

I got the rejection letter just now.

I will probably e-mail the interviewer to thank her and ask her if there's any feedback she could give me on my performance. I've done this before; sometimes it works, sometimes you hear nada.

Thank you all for your good wishes. I am going to crawl back into my hole now and lick my wounds.I can't top the good advice you have been given here, just giving you another vote for taking good care of yourself, sleep the best you can and eat as well as you can, it helps, it really does is my experience.....Don't lose your health to these issues I guess is what I am saying. Rob

frugalone
11-17-11, 3:04pm
I did e-mail the interviewer, asking for some feedback and expressing my interest that we stay in touch. so far, she has not replied to me and it's been a week.

Had an interview for a temporary job with FEMA on Tuesday. Got the rejection letter today. So hard to keep going. Esp. when I saw in my bank account that I have enough to pay some bills this month, the rent for December, and then I guess it's Goodbye, 403(b) time.

flowerseverywhere
11-17-11, 6:44pm
I did e-mail the interviewer, asking for some feedback and expressing my interest that we stay in touch. so far, she has not replied to me and it's been a week.

Had an interview for a temporary job with FEMA on Tuesday. Got the rejection letter today. So hard to keep going. Esp. when I saw in my bank account that I have enough to pay some bills this month, the rent for December, and then I guess it's Goodbye, 403(b) time.

I am hoping things turn around for you and quickly. Sorry you are having such a hard time.

frugalone
11-18-11, 5:44pm
Thank you, all of you.

Spartana
11-18-11, 7:01pm
L in B : I don't know if you are in an area with lots of stores but every one that I have seen has ads looking for temp employees for the holidays - cashiers, sales, stockers. I have heard that many of the big box stores will be opening MUCH earlier this year for Black Friday (Friday after Thanksgiving) - many opening at midnight and Walmart is (saddly IMHO) opening at 10 pm on Thanksgiving day. Even sadder is that some stores ( and many fast food places) will be open all day Thanksgiving - 6 am to midnight - basicly never closing! Also it looks like the holiday hours for all stores that I saw (was at a mall today - massively packed!) will be open very early each morning and late (midnight) each night - some even open 24 hours a day - all the way to Christmas Eve. And then will have similair hours starting the day after Christmas. While that makes me all "bah-Humbuggy" that we are such a consumer driven nation, it is a great opportunity to earn some money (lots of OT too) in this economy.

JaneV2.0
11-19-11, 7:15pm
Most of the library assistants where I worked started out as pages, working part time.

Zoebird
11-20-11, 3:38pm
seasonal work is a good idea to at least get some cash to head into january!

frugalone
11-20-11, 10:22pm
Yeah, but what happens after that, I wonder?

flowerseverywhere
11-20-11, 10:40pm
Yeah, but what happens after that, I wonder?
you continue your job search but you have allowed yourself some time to not have to tap savings. Sometimes temp jobs turn into permanent ones if you are lucky. Do any of us want to work retail? No. Lots of crabby stressed customers, crappy hours but when everything is falling apart sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

Personally I see our chain restaurants always full of cars so I think if I really had to get a job to keep afloat that is where I would go, as a hostess or a server for breakfast or lunch. Hard work but I would do it if I had to. Other stores that see business year around are those that sell appliances, as they break and need to be replaced, or a specialty store that supplies hobbies, like a fabric store.

Zoebird
11-21-11, 12:04am
basically, true.

it might become permanent work -- one of my friends started in seasonal work, which turned into part time, which turned into full time, which turned into management. she's actually quite happy managing the store.

frugalone
11-21-11, 4:56am
Of course I am not knocking what anyone says. However, we cannot survive on minimum wage, not for very long. I won't be able to pay my bills. And believe me, I don't have any credit card debt, student loans, car loans, or a big cable TV bill. So I'm not sure how long this would actually work out.

Frankly, I find it very hard to believe I'm going to ever find a good job again. After 20 weeks of applying to two or more places a week, and getting something like 3 interviews from it, it's just hard to hold out hope much longer.

I just had hoped it wasn't going to come to this--that something would have come up in the meantime.

I'm very despondent.

lizii
11-21-11, 5:31am
How about taking care of seniors? Many seniors are lonely, can no longer drive, have no one near them to take them for simple pleasures such as going for a drive, shopping, go to a doctor, etc. If you have a car, this would be a great way to earn money.

We have a service here called Driving Miss Daisy, owned by a very kind, middle-aged woman, who saw a need and started her business by buying a couple of cheap but reliable cars--PT Flyers. I use this service to see my doctor, have my income tax forms filled out at our local seniors' centre once a year, all for $36.00/trip including taxes!

As for groceries, my oldest son takes me shopping every weekend. He also does my banking--paying bills, buying a bottle of wine occasionally, mailing my letters, cards, etc.

I also have a care aide every day to make my dinner...this is another free service to me as a retired senior who has an income under $36,000 per year! I even have a break for being a senior living alone to pay for my rent, etc...

loosechickens
11-21-11, 4:00pm
Despondent hurts......and paralyzes you, also, from being able to see alternatives, even unpleasant ones. Sometimes, coming to an understanding of the new reality at a gut level helps us make choices that would have been unthinkable during the period we had sufficient income.

People DO survive on minimum wage. They don't live the way we would want to live, they may rent a single room in someone's house with a hotplate and no refrigerator, keeping their eggs and milk on the windowsill in winter. They may have to welcome a roomer or roommate into their homes when they'd prefer to live alone. I had a friend once, with a one bedroom apartment, who took a roomate who got the bedroom while she slept on a pullout sofa in the living room and couldn't go to bed until the roomate left the room.

It stinks. But whatever you can do to bring in even the most meager of money will help. If nothing else than helping you be less of a drag on any retirement savings you might have had, making them last longer. As will cutting every possible expense to the bone, even if it means a change of diet, having to use a food pantry, etc.

The quicker you can come to a mental space of seeing this as a life test of your ingenuity, ability to be flexible, a challenge to your abilities to cope that you can rise to, etc., the better you will do. The looking backward, allowing despondent thoughts into your mind, and somehow expecting that things can and will return to "normal", the harder it is for you. It's hard, but facing reality squarely, rolling up your sleeves and being determined to conquer this, seeing yourself as a warrior who WILL figure it out, WILL discover ways to make the money stretch, use less, and keep your spirits up, will be the best way not only to survive this, but to come out on the other side at some point feeling stronger, more capable and triumphant.

We, in this country, may well be facing a new reality, and the more able we are to roll with the punches and adapt, the better we'll be. You may have to do work that is distasteful, menial or really low paying, but you will survive this.

Many, many cyberhugs coming your way ladyinblack, because I know it's hard, but you will figure this out, and not allowing yourself to become paralyzed and depressed, but somehow summoning the courage to see it as a challenge and one that you will meet will help a lot.

flowerseverywhere
11-21-11, 4:22pm
Yes, there are so many of us who could be in your shoes, so I do feel very bad for you. It must be very hard to know in your heart you are a good person and want to work but just cannot get in the door.

It can be very demeaning and demoralizing. I have a relative who now works intake with county welfare clients, and is subject to all kinds of abuse from the clients. At first they wanted to quit, but had gone through six months of no work so took the job. To have someone call you lazy who is at home collecting benefits and does not want to fill out their paperwork while you make in the mid thirties is very difficult to do. but as the weeks have gone by an adjustment was made and they are doing well. They grasp on to those who are kind and appreciative, and block out those who are not.

If only we could go back and see what was coming, many of us would have changed a lot. Unfortunately there are so many people who have made out like bandits while leaving so many in the lurch. Recently the company DH used to work for tried to cut pensions for several hundred who were within two years of retirement, while the CEO got over a 9 million dollar bonus. The amount they tried to take away was a fraction of that. It was so ridiculous that they would even have the nerve to do so. But that is the reality of what is going on all around us. Years ago I remember working for a company who really cared about their employees. Now what I see all around me are companies saying if you don't like it, there is the door, there are many who would love this job and collecting huge bonuses while their employees know that they could be downsized in a minute. Just a whole attitude change of I'll get mine, the hell with you. So since I don't think we are going to change that, we can only change our own attitude.

So I really wish you well, and I hope someday that you post about a good job you landed, but for now I hope you can keep moving forward and doing everything you can to stay afloat. It won't be easy but if there was anything I could say to make you feel better or to help you I would. I am glad you posted all your difficulties, and I hope that the support you are getting is helpful, even if in a small way.

Zoebird
11-21-11, 9:39pm
I agree with what everyone here is saying about the feeling of hopelessness and frustration that you feel.

I also hear you in regards to living on minimum wage. But, if there is an alternative between bringing in a bit of cash now, while still continuing to look for work, I would take it -- personally speaking. In fact, in the past, I have taken it.

We take any kind of work we can get, to be honest. If we can balance it with our son's care needs (without resorting to childcare), then we take it. Every little bit helps us. We are living just at minimum wage right now, and we are able to *barely* make our monthly expenses. No, it isn't easy.

But working makes us feel good, too, and hopeful, and that we will keep going, and things will get better. And we don't have to dip into our savings or retirement anymore. It helps, it really does.

frugalone
11-25-11, 6:59pm
flowerseverywhere, "mid thirties"--I'll be lucky if I ever make anything near that again, I fear.

I worked hard to get through school, 7 years as an adult student, literally shedding tears over every class and term paper. Finally got a job that paid something decent, after making just about minimum wage most of my life in crummy jobs. Finally was able to save money, have a pension, etc. Then I lost my job--the only good paying job I have ever had, that paid enough for us to live on.

I'm going to stop posting here, because there is nothing anyone can say anymore. And I'm sure you are all sick and tired of my self-pitying, sniveling rants.

I really feel like my life is over and nothing good is ever going to happen again.

EDIT: Again, I want to thank all of you for listening to me. And for your help and advice.

Valley
11-25-11, 9:28pm
Please don't feel that your life is over...your life as you have known it while you were employed is over...but there is still a new and hopefully good life for you...just not right now. Please don't give up hope. I was widowed very young, and I was very despondent for awhile, but my life has changed and evolved in ways that I never could have imagined. My life is good again... very different, but still very good! I will be thinking about you and many others struggling to find employment. God bless you!

ApatheticNoMore
11-25-11, 10:11pm
Take care of yourself, come back whenever you want to.

flowerseverywhere
11-25-11, 11:16pm
flowerseverywhere, "mid thirties"--I'll be lucky if I ever make anything near that again, I fear.

I worked hard to get through school, 7 years as an adult student, literally shedding tears over every class and term paper. Finally got a job that paid something decent, after making just about minimum wage most of my life in crummy jobs. Finally was able to save money, have a pension, etc. Then I lost my job--the only good paying job I have ever had, that paid enough for us to live on.

I'm going to stop posting here, because there is nothing anyone can say anymore. And I'm sure you are all sick and tired of my self-pitying, sniveling rants.

I really feel like my life is over and nothing good is ever going to happen again.

EDIT: Again, I want to thank all of you for listening to me. And for your help and advice.

Well I for one am not tired of reading your posts. There is not one person here that has not had bad times, experienced losses or just plain didn't have their stars align and have things work out they really wanted. You have worked so hard I sincerely hope the future holds good things for you.

loosechickens
11-26-11, 12:38am
absolutely, ladyinblack.......never feel like people are tired of hearing your troubles......troubles shared are troubles halved, and you are going through some really tough times right now, and NEED that chance to vent. Not to worry.

when we're right in the middle of hard times, whether it is job loss, stock market crashes taking retirement savings with it, health issues, death of family members, etc., it seems as though the bad times will never end. But one thing is sure.....everything changes. And even bad stuff has a way of working itself out, and often into a brighter future, just when things look the blackest and the most hopeless.

You haven't done anything wrong, and I hope you continue to post, share your feelings, and we'll all be pulling for you, and hoping that things turn around for you soon. I know it sounds like an old saw that things look blackest before the dawn, but it is often true, so please, don't give up hope. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and do your best not to give in to hopelessness, because that makes your problems even harder to deal with.

Zoebird
11-26-11, 2:47am
i agree, there's nothing wrong with the way you feel.

a lot of people, btw, are sharing your experience. one of my friends is in a similar situation, but she has gotten a job in retail to defray some of her costs. she is frustrated, because she worked hard to get to where she was, was really good at her job, and had made a comfortable life for herself.

and then, was let go due to economic issues with the company, and ultimately could only find a retail position. she is very frustrated and upset about 'her lot' right now. i don't blame her.

Zoe Girl
11-27-11, 1:22am
Oh dear, well you are not alone and I don't have any advice. i realize that it is hard, I just figured out that without child support I would be at the federal poverty line. And thank goodness I have the child support. I also worked for years through school and a masters, and am lucky to have what I have even though it is NOT enough. I guess I could stop fixing my daughters teeth that cracked but is that really an option?

So it has been a rough holiday week, I don't know about you. Seeing people in comfortable homes with enough money and realizing their kids will get christmas presents was almost too much. And then the inevitable comment 'oh but why don't you get a teaching job, you didn't want to?', um no, 5 years of searching and I was done. At least at our 2nd thanksgiving no one asked.

I understand the feeling that you are done, it is what my son't counselor would call 'soft suicidal', and now we cannot afford that either. But you are not alone and we are not tired of hearing from you.

frugalone
11-29-11, 9:31pm
Thank you, so much.

I am applying for things I think I could tolerate without freaking out on somebody. "Know Thyself," and I know I have a short fuse and would probably not do too well with cranky customers.
This HAS been a rough week, Zoe Girl. Everywhere I look there's ads for Xmas gifts, food, you name it. I had arguments/tiffs with two friends in the past three days (one a friend I have known since we were 14) and the other an online pen pal. I'm just not "myself" these days.

"Soft suicidal"--have never heard that term before.

I will keep going...

frugalone
12-24-11, 5:14pm
Update: I applied to Sallie Mae and had a two-hour interview with them. It was for processing student loan deferments. Basically a "cube farm," but hey, it had perks and paid $10 an hour.

Got an e-mail two days later saying "thanks but no thanks." Then, if you can believe this, they actually sent me an automated e-mail asking for "feedback" on their interview process. I felt like typing two words, and they ain't "good luck", but I restrained myself.

Why do I feel like the employer holds all the reins/cards/etc.? And I get to just sit here and take the abuse? "Please, sir, may I have some more?"

Forgive my bitterness, but not a damn thing has improved since I last posted on this board.

reader99
12-24-11, 10:50pm
Update: I applied to Sallie Mae and had a two-hour interview with them. It was for processing student loan deferments. Basically a "cube farm," but hey, it had perks and paid $10 an hour.

Got an e-mail two days later saying "thanks but no thanks." Then, if you can believe this, they actually sent me an automated e-mail asking for "feedback" on their interview process. I felt like typing two words, and they ain't "good luck", but I restrained myself.

Why do I feel like the employer holds all the reins/cards/etc.? And I get to just sit here and take the abuse? "Please, sir, may I have some more?"

Forgive my bitterness, but not a damn thing has improved since I last posted on this board.

The employer does hold all the cards. I still apply for jobs I'm qualified for, but I no longer go into it thinking I might actually get the job.

I just found out that the new Board of my condo assoc is going to crack down on the owners who haven't been paying their condo fees. Within 2 months there will be 30 low-priced foreclosure units available in this building, soaking up all the demand and undercutting my price by as much as 50%. I have to take the next half-reasonable offer I get, or be stuck here until my IRA runs out and I'm foreclosed in my turn. My plan is to buy a 2 or 3 bedroom foreclosure or short sale and get roommates to generate some cash flow.

Zoe Girl
12-25-11, 10:01pm
Oh dear, I am so sorry to everyone. I got another letter from the mortgage company that foreclosed my house. I tried a short sale but they foreclosed in 6 months. The home affordable option was just too much to try in the middle of 2 jobs, 7 days a week. I can't believe that after all the years I rounded up the payments on my 1st and 2nd mortgage as a single mom they are still going to come after me 1 1/2 years later? I lost everything I had 'saved' in that house. So I am not sure how to stop it but I will give it a try.

So I am still trying on the job front, I try not to get discouraged however as I go back into it for a better paying position it is hard to put aside all the rejection from the last 5 years. I know others have been dealing with this a few years and in teaching it has been even longer.

So I feel for us all!

frugalone
12-25-11, 10:12pm
reader99, I am so sorry. That just isn't fair! I don't know much about condos (though my mom has a time share in Fla.) but any property ownership sounds like it can be a pain in the rump. I hope your plan works out.

Zoe Girl, I've worked the two-job deal when I was much younger and had more energy--and it wasn't easy then! I am sorry about your home. I guess I am lucky that I rent--even though that could go "poof" if the landlord decides to move one of his kids in here or something.

Sounds like nobody is getting a "break" these days.

Amaranth
12-26-11, 3:42pm
Update: I applied to Sallie Mae and had a two-hour interview with them. It was for processing student loan deferments. Basically a "cube farm," but hey, it had perks and paid $10 an hour.

Got an e-mail two days later saying "thanks but no thanks." Then, if you can believe this, they actually sent me an automated e-mail asking for "feedback" on their interview process. I felt like typing two words, and they ain't "good luck", but I restrained myself.

Why do I feel like the employer holds all the reins/cards/etc.? And I get to just sit here and take the abuse? "Please, sir, may I have some more?"

Forgive my bitterness, but not a damn thing has improved since I last posted on this board.

I have run across job interviewing processes where the "turn down" was fake but part of the process and the "feedback" was the next step in the interview process. I have also run across situations where the turn down and feedback were real, but when all the planned hires didn't work out(got better offers, failed background checks, etc), they used people's responses to the feedback to select the next hires.

So if you didn't answer the feedback yet, consider answering it as if it was the next phase of the interview process.

ApatheticNoMore
12-27-11, 2:25am
I have run across job interviewing processes where the "turn down" was fake but part of the process and the "feedback" was the next step in the interview process.

Oh my, who would even want to work with a company with that level of game playing going on? I mean it just speaks volumes. At this point it's not even "employers holding all the cards" but more like employers batting you around like a cat playing with a dead mouse.


I have also run across situations where the turn down and feedback were real, but when all the planned hires didn't work out(got better offers, failed background checks, etc), they used people's responses to the feedback to select the next hires.

Well at least that is semi-legit.

pinkytoe
12-27-11, 10:58am
A few years back, (dh at age 52) was laid off and the following days were the darkest of our lives. Flash forward to today and things are OK again. He is working beneath his experience level but at least those days are behind us. It is true that eventually everything changes and I hope that your situation turns around too. I think if I were in that place, I would look for some part time volunteer work while lookiing just to get my mind off of it. Helping others can be good medicine.

frugalone
12-28-11, 12:50am
Thanks, pinkytoe. I may do that.

saguaro
12-28-11, 11:36am
Like pinkytoe's DH, my own DH was laid off from his job; the job he held for 15 years and expected to retire from. He was 53. He was the most down I had ever seen him. He was out of work for over 2 years before landing a job in April and just shy of 56. He spent his time going to school and doing some part time freelance work.

Support your way. These things don't go on forever, though it seems that way. It does change, it really does.

frugalone
12-28-11, 4:57pm
Saguaro, thank you for encouraging me. I just started an Etsy shop in November, hoping to realize some of my dreams of being an artist. I have thought about becoming a librarian for years; perhaps 2012 is the year to volunteer at the local library.

I'm glad your husband found a job. Yours too, pinkytoe. Best of luck!

frugalone
1-21-12, 4:55am
Another chapter in the ongoing saga: I applied for a position at my alma mater, as a graduate dept. assistant/secretary. Got a letter today saying the position is not being filled--must have been some budget cuts there. Sigh.