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CatsNK
1-31-11, 9:47am
Help! It looks like I'll finally be getting married - for the 1st time at 41.

I've never been one to dream about my wedding - I always thought I'd be at least 40 when I got married - I'm not the "fantasy wedding" kind of person at all.

BUT. Now that the time is here, I'm a bit freaked about all of the possibilities. I woke up today wondering how I could think about not spending a lot on my wedding since it's only once and it's my day, yadda, yadda...

We've been considering renting a large house at a resort in VT in the winter and bringing both of our families up for a weekend of skiing, sledding, & fun. It will set us back about $5K, not including the dress & photographer.

Now I'm thinking maybe St. Johns - just elope - avoids lots of potential problems w/family - but how to organize an island wedding from NY?!

Anyone else done a wedding away from home and how did it work out? Any thoughts about cheap destinations?

I'm really not interested in doing it in one of our backyards - we have considered and might again a local state park but I think I'd really prefer to be away - somewhere special.

citrine
1-31-11, 12:50pm
I definitely identify with you...never planned my wedding day either. I am in a serious relationship now, but still haven't thought about how it would be done. I guess the first thing you need to discern is if you want family and friends with you for the wedding. If not, I am sure you can contact the hotel where you will be staying and see if their event planner can help you with organizing the wedding via email/phone.

kally
1-31-11, 1:49pm
I like the idea of a weekend. A wedding with lots of fun attached. Congrats.

fidgiegirl
1-31-11, 7:00pm
My sister got married in Hawaii and used a planner or consultant or something like that. I'm not convinced they needed them (it was a husband/wife team). The planners booked the site and stuff like that, but I wonder if my DSis couldn't have done it herself. There were a few things that annoyed them, like they had a certain budget for flowers and the planners totally blew it. They had kick-butt flowers, but still, not cool. But my DSis is kind of a worrier, so having the reassurance that someone on site and with experience would be available to help was important to her.

I wasn't super dreamy about my wedding, but it was fun to think about it once we were engaged. We ended up renting a riverboat for the event! Since it was July 3 we motored to downtown St. Paul and watched the fireworks. It was close to home but still special.

I liked the book The Green Bride Guide for inspiration. I also looooooved the site Offbeat Bride (http://offbeatbride.com/) for ideas and simply for fun. She also has a book.

Congratulations!!

CatsNK
2-1-11, 9:40am
Thanks, fidgiegirl. I'll see if I can find the book at the library and check out the site. I feel the need for creative suggestions nowadays!

Hawaii sounds nice. It's too far from here but a similar type of thing on the US Virgin Islands or something similar would be terrific.

Mrs-M
2-20-11, 3:44pm
CatsNK. Wishing you a great big and happy congratulations!!! I feel so bad missing this thread, particularly because marriage is such a special time in ones life. (Me and reading- as in seeing/remembering things/words, not good).

Anyhow, wishing you all the best and don't place too much emphasis on where you go, or for how long, and definitely don't over-complicate the vacation getaway process by overthinking any of the details. Wing it and just have a great time together. Go with what you and your SO are happy going with! :)

P.S. A long time ago, well back in 2006 when I originally joined SLN I remember there was a member named catsarenotkids (or something like that). Are you the same member/person? Did you used to be member of SLN back then?

CatsNK
2-21-11, 12:29pm
Hi Mrs. M. Thank you for responding and for your wishes! I was catsnotkids previously on this board. 2006 sounds right. :)

As for wedding planning... we have so many (conflicting, of course) ideas between the two of us. I don't mean that we conflict with each other - more that we share ideas that are wildly different. Beach vs. snowy mountains. DF is now suggesting a bike trip. Who knows! I do know that we'll need to decide pretty soon as health insurance is going to become an issue...

Azure
2-21-11, 12:58pm
Congrats! How exciting. I'm sure it will be beautiful no matter what you do.

Mrs-M
2-22-11, 1:40pm
Good morning CatsNK! You were so much fun and helped spree on so many great conversations. So glad to see you back again. :)

IshbelRobertson
2-22-11, 2:14pm
One of my offspring has just announced that she intends to marry in May 2012 on a greek island! She is determined to feel sunshine on her wedding day, and that is almost impossible to guarantee in the UK (especially in Scotland). She says that she will ensure that people are guided towards the cheapest flights, villas, hotels etc and, that if they want to come, fine: if they don't - then fine, too!

BTW - congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

reader99
2-22-11, 3:58pm
Though 2XDH and I met and lived in FL, both of our families were mostly in NY, so we married there. Arrangements by phone weren't really any harder than arranging by phone locally.

Big difference was EXPENSE. OTOH, it meant that many people who couldn't or woulndn't have travelled to FL were there, and that was very important.

I bet St. Johns and similar places have LOTS of people wanting to marry there. Maybe the local chamber of commerce could direct you? Or, consider marrying on a cruise ship. In that case, lavish food and entertainment are already laid on, so all you need is fancy clothes, an officiant and photographer.

CatsNK
2-23-11, 9:27am
A Greek island. I LOVE it!!! Years ago I dreamed of honeymooning in Greece - I'd totally forgotten about that! Thank you for the reminder! A wedding in Greece would be even better.

Our families can be difficult - we'd be OK with having it far enough away that they couldn't all come... if you know what I mean.

I've done some Googling on St. Johns - there are services that help with this - providing officiant and photographer as a package. I'm too seasick to cruise, unfortunately, though.

Mrs-M
2-13-12, 10:01pm
CatsNK. Thinking of you and hoping all is well. Please drop by to say hello when you can. I've missed your company.

redfox
2-14-12, 12:19am
Congrats!
1. Have fun - it's YOUR party.
2. Don't stress over it - it's YOUR party.
3. Spend whatever you want, no more.
4. Invite whoever you want to party with... because IT'S YOUR PARTY!!!

Remember that whatever is done by the day you get married is what's done. And then you have the rest of your life to do all the other stuff you want to do. Keep it simple!
(We got married in a public park, kept the expense low & had a total blast. I was 49.)

Zoebird
2-14-12, 4:17am
Nm, post facto! :D