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View Full Version : Taking my time back: Time Clutter



puglogic
10-19-12, 3:59pm
As hard as I try to make every hour count during my day, I still find there aren't enough hours to get everything done sometimes, or worse, I get to the end of the day and don't feel like I really focused on the things that matter. I just breathed, ate, drank, worked, and slept, and not much else.

I am embarking on an effort to declutter my time, get rid of things that are just time sucks, or don't make me happy, or don't get me anywhere. I'm not starting from zero; I already have eliminated almost all TV-watching from my life, and any little I do (movies and such), I'm often doing something while it's on, like mending or typing for work. But I'm hoping to root out other areas where I can clear out old habits and take back at least a few hours a week.

Some things I've already thought about are economizing in the kitchen by making multiple meals at once in a crock pot or similar.....bundling my errands to save both time and gasoline......and then.....I sort of run out of ideas :(

Has anyone else ever tried to declutter their time, and end up with more spaciousness in their lives? What were the biggest areas where you made changes? OR, what's one teeny little tip that helps you, and you could pass along to someone else? Any and all ideas would be very, very welcome. Thanks!

ApatheticNoMore
10-19-12, 4:10pm
I've realized I can't shop after work on weekdays, I did it one day this week, then cooked and then it was 10pm before I knew it. More stocking up on the weekends I guess, an ocassional emergency run before work is ok.

I've realized I can't make more than one somewhat involved dish per day. Sure I might get ambitious and want to make an involved main dish and a fancy side. Or hey while I'm at it, lets make soup, or veggie broth, or salsa, or salad dressing. Um no, it does not work, one per day. A piece of meat and sauteed veggies can count as one dish, that's easy. I mostly need a shorter commute really to tell the truth.

I have other plans but don't stick to them, like always buy gas on the weekend, so I don't run out in the week etc..

fidgiegirl
10-19-12, 4:12pm
Last year when we bought the house I quit everything I was involved in. It was very freeing, and I had a good "excuse," so no one felt bad - not me, and not the people I was doing the activities with.

Also, I feel better when I stick to the "two minute rule" of Getting Things Done. If it can be done in less than 2 minutes, do it. I have been getting away from this and it results in messes, piles of dirty dishes, unfiled papers, clutter, and a mental to-do list a mile long. Have been wanting to get back to it.

I would highly encourage reading Getting Things Done. I noticed a much more in-control feeling when I was focused on following his guidelines. It took some time up front to understand, but once I had it, I really benefited. If you end up thinking it's something you'd like to work on, I'd happily re-read and do a book study with you here on the forums. Or if that's too much (considering you want to get AWAY from activities that require time ;) ) , that's cool, too. That said, ALL of GTD is overwhelming for me sometimes. I get the most bang out of the mind dump and the 2 minute rule, and when I've managed it, from inbox zero.

Rosemary
10-19-12, 4:49pm
I do something similar to fidgiegirl's 2 minute rule, except that I do all things that take 10 minutes or less, when I think of them. It's more hassle to write it down than just to do it.

I've simplified our meals greatly. When the ingredients are fresh and seasonal, elaborate preparations are not needed. My recent cooking hasn't been my new usual, due to my parents' visit, but I will soon be back to it, and my body is looking forward to it. I've mostly eliminated baking from my routine; occasionally I make some bread or a fruit dessert. When I cook, I usually cook more than for one meal and freeze the extra, or plan it for a busy day later in the week. I batch-cook DD's favorite soup for her packed lunches, and I spend an hour or two 2-3x/week in prepping vegetables.

I've removed myself from many email and postal mail lists.
I've stepped away from some volunteer activities and reduced the time that I'm spending on others.
I've made conscious decisions about which friends to spend time with.
I'm at peace with the level of cleanliness in our home. It is not a museum.

I know that I can only work on one project and still keep everything else (DD's activities, basic volunteer stuff, laundry, cleaning, finances, food) going at a functional level. In the summer, that's our yard/garden. In the winter I can use that time for knitting or other crafts, and I usually have one big winter project that I spend a couple of months on. But I can't do all those things at once. This summer, when I was spending 4-5 hours/day working in the yard, our meals were *very* simple.

puglogic
10-19-12, 4:55pm
Such good stuff already here. ANM, I have been fighting that same thing, trying to plan these marathon cooking/preparation things with the best intentions, and feeling like a rank loser when I all I get made is dinner and maybe a pan of muffins. Maybe I need to schedule a day for that, like Sunday, and get some help. Or friends to do it with, or something...

Kelli, I've ordered GTD from the library (on the wait list...must be popular :) ) and will see what it's all about.

Rosemary, how did you decide what to step away from, and what to stay with? What were your criteria? I sometimes have a problem deciding that.

herbgeek
10-19-12, 5:06pm
Find time for meditation early in the day. Focus in your mind what is important to you, and make this a habit. When I don't do this, its way too easy to fritter away the day doing necessary but not urgent things instead of what is truly important.

Rosemary
10-19-12, 5:14pm
Puglogic, It's never easy to move away from activities and friends that you've spend a great deal of time with.
I sued to be a volunteer at our public library. I left that entirely because they have plenty of volunteers. I enjoyed it for a while and then was ready to move on. I've taken less involved roles than I used to have at our church and PTA, both for a change and to reduce my time commitment. In both cases it just felt like it was time to let other people step up to the plate. In every organization there seems to be a core group that does most of the work, and I've been in that core group too often.
Moving away from friends is more difficult, but several times over numerous years I've consciously decided to have less regular time with and/or communication with friends who were taking too much of my energy. Perhaps that is because a person is too needy, too negative, or simply not a good match with my personality. In each case it went smoothly and seemed a natural progression.


As for cooking ahead of time - I don't do the "month in a day" type cooking. The meals that are typically prepared that way don't work with how we eat. Here's the type of cooking ahead that I do:
* roast a chicken. eat for dinner. shred leftovers and freeze for easy taco nights. Can season before freezing if desired. Put the chicken carcass in the crockpot overnight with water, bay leaves, etc. Strain in the morning and use the broth to make soup. Return broth to the crockpot, add veggies and other ingredients. This makes at least 6 meals for our family from one chicken. If you don't like to buy whole chickens, you can do the same thing with parts. If you don't buy parts with bones, you can start by poaching the chicken and then using that for the soup.

* Make any kind of soup: make a double recipe and freeze half. It's not that much more work to chop double the veggies, and the rest of soup ingredients are easy.
* Get out the food processor and chop all the onions you'll need for the week. A lot less crying involved! Can also freeze chopped onions if desired.
* Cook a whole pound of dried beans, and freeze what you won't use that week.
* If cooking meat, cook double what you'll need and freeze the rest (or set aside for another busy day). I hate handling raw meat so it's a bonus for me to have to do it less often.
* At Thanksgiving I always roast an 18-20 pound turkey. It's the same mess as for a 10-pound turkey, and gives us leftovers that can be used in so many ways. Of course, I freeze them so that we're not eating turkey every night for 2 weeks.

So when you're cooking for multiple nights, it helps to not serve all the food family-style. I usually make up our plates in the kitchen and serve the veggies family-style, because that's what we should all eat the most. When I do serve meats family-style, I set aside the part that is for another meal first.

shadowmoss
10-19-12, 5:14pm
Funny, I just broke down and bought a copy of GTD and am working on getting ready to implement it. Mostly that means I'm doing a lot of the little stuff so that when I sit down to do the massive inbox project it isn't as massive. I'm up for a GTD roundtable. He also has an email newsletter that I have gotten for years. Just a small shot of encouragement along the way.

As for finding what needs to be trimmed, time-wise, maybe to a time log to see where your time goes. Just as with money, it's hard to budget if you don't know where it goes or where the leaks are.

Tammy
10-19-12, 5:29pm
I have decided that my 45-50 hour work weeks are all that I need. I don't volunteer for anything. Instead I give money. I have learned to not feel guilty about that. There will be time in retirement to give my time, when my money is less available. I also don't go to church, and don't join clubs or social groups. When I'm not working, my time is my own. I say no to everything else.

After 20 years as a pastors wife, I can't tell you how great this is. We don't owe our time to anyone. That's why its called volunteering. If there's any sense of obligation, you need to stop.

That proverbs 31 woman is used to guilt people, espwcially women, into giving up their precious free time. That mythical woman accomplished all that stuff over a lifetime. She didn't do all that stuff at the same time.

There are seasons in life. Many of them. Only do a few things, and do them well, in each season. And take care of yourself all along the way. Say no freely.

ApatheticNoMore
10-19-12, 5:30pm
ANM, I have been fighting that same thing, trying to plan these marathon cooking/preparation things with the best intentions, and feeling like a rank loser when I all I get made is dinner and maybe a pan of muffins. Maybe I need to schedule a day for that, like Sunday, and get some help. Or friends to do it with, or something...

Dinner and a pan of muffins is pretty good. :) At this point I'm more like, if I want to make salsa from scratch (it's a cooked salsa), that's fine, but I do it on a day I have leftover veggie soup (from a previous day) for dinner or something. I'm really down to that level of easy. I've really given up. Then again besides eating it in the usual manner, I use salsa for things like a base for another type of soup (cooking chicken parts in homemade salsa and some water). I also have some pretty elaborate salad dressings not just vinegrettes but things like roast a red peper, yea if I do that those can also be on a day I'm not cooking. That "everlasting meal" book wasn't actually as terrible as one review on here, it did have a few good ideas: like meals should flow into each other, one meal becomes a base for another. Now they follow it to a level of frugality I just can't manage and keep body and soul together. Every onion peel is not going to be saved for soup (it's admirable and all that, but it's not realistic for me). However, I made rice and baba ghanouj one day, I add a meat preparation the next, that is flow. I also agree soups just might be the answer I was looking for, soup a couple days a week might make things doable (like stocking up, soup veggies will I hope KEEP until the end of the week, whereas not everything will).

I've also realised I need to take recycling in almost once a week on the weekend, it piles up, oh to have curbside recycling for apartments.

pinkytoe
10-19-12, 5:48pm
I know my biggest time suck is the internet - I am an information junkie so spend way too much precious life here. Also, I have spent the past few years volunteering for several nature programs and let our yard and gardens go in the meantime. This fall and coming spring will be mine once again to redesign, clean and plant my own yard.

fidgiegirl
10-19-12, 5:59pm
Saying no takes practice, but I am getting better at it. In fact, the dentist wanted me to reschedule my appointment for 7:00 a.m. this morning on a bonus day off from work, and I said no! :)

GTD has a decidedly corporate slant to it, but lessons to learn for all.

Back when I followed his blog more closely, Trent from The Simple Dollar is who got me into it. His summaries are pretty useful even without the book. Here's a list of all 14 entries. (http://www.thesimpledollar.com/category/personal-productivity-personal-development/)

And since LeechBlock is about to cut me off, I bid you adieu for tonight, my simple friends! :)

Lainey
10-19-12, 8:13pm
I also don't go to church ...

After 20 years as a pastors wife, I can't tell you how great this is. .

Tammy - did I misunderstand, is your husband no longer a pastor, or is he still a pastor and you just don't attend the church?

Mrs. Hermit
10-19-12, 8:41pm
I felt like my schedule was running me instead of the other way around. I signed up for KLOK (the free version). It is a time tracking software. It helps me see where all my time is going. Once I understood what was happening to my time, I could tweak things around better. I was able to commit to taking 2 graduate school courses this semester instead of just one because I saw enough time in the schedule to complete them.

Tammy
10-19-12, 10:11pm
He stopped pastoring about 12 years ago.

SteveinMN
10-19-12, 10:59pm
If there's any sense of obligation, you need to stop.
That's been my yardstick. If I cannot answer the question "Do I want to do this?" with an enthusiastic "Yes!", I try really hard to get out of whatever obligation it is. Doesn't always work -- the unenthusiastic yeses go to killing bugs, unplugging toilets, etc.. But it certainly has given me the direction I needed to stop certain activities, discontinue/minimize relationships with certain people, etc.

Fawn
10-19-12, 11:07pm
When I was working 60 hours per week plus single parenting, I eliminated everything that wasn't absolutely needed to maintain life. I cooked from scratch, froze stuff and made simple meals (learned from Spartana aka Lindi.) Dinner always took less than 30 minutes, although I did some prep on days off. Nothing wrong with baked chicken thighs and sectioned oranges for dinner. Bonus if there are home made cookies.

I do a smidge of volunteering for teen activites now that I only work 36 hours per week. I can cart a drum set to the performance one day a semester.

It is a rare day that I spend more than 30 minutes online, and that includes checking the kids grades, helping DD apply for college stuff, working on getting my book printed/marketed, reading MSNBC articles that my ex-husband has written.

I do not watch TV.

On a good day, I read library books for 6 hours and cook and clean for 2 hours and work in the yard/on the house for 2 more.

You just have to decide where you want to spend your day and make the change in habits that it requires.

Some tips from the SL forums sumarized:
1) it doesn't take a lot of time to eat healthy, but if you like to cook, you can spend a lot of time doing that.
2) it doesn't take a lot of time to connect in a meaningful way with friends/family, but some of us need that.
3) hobbies come and go. What you want to do when you are 20 changes when you are 30 and 40. No shame in moving to something else.
4) it doesn't require a lot of stuff to be happy, but some people have a lot of fun with their stuff.

If you are having a hard time eliminating stuff from your life, declare a fast/move to another state where no one knows you/or otherwise shockingly change your life. Leave out everything except food and rest until you get bored. Then add in one thing more. Until you get bored...etc. until you get to balance.

When I was 20 I wanted to save the world. When I was 30 I wanted to give the world emotionally whole children. Now, I am 53, and I would like to find emotional wholeness for myself....to give to the world. You all and the kids are on your own. :)

puglogic
10-20-12, 10:05am
This is all such great advice. It seems like the biggest bang for my buck, timewise, would be to step back from some social obligations, keep the TV off, and find a way to economize in the kitchen that I am willing/able to follow-through on. I realize that I have to go in right now and spend at least an hour doing up breakfast, emptying the dishwasher, washing the pots and pans by hand (does anybody put these through the dishwasher? seems like a waste of space but oh I am tempted sometimes). It would be great to have more of a system there. Or a slave boy :D

I need to get over the feeling of "self improvement fatigue" that I have around this too. It seems like I've learned/implemented so many things, and done so many tweaks to myself over the past decade or two in order to be happier, healthier, stronger, that I sometimes get burned out, and think "If I have to do one more self-improvement thing I'm going to scream." Is this weird?

creaker
10-20-12, 10:51am
When the time comes (although the time hasn't been set yet), to actually go to work to work, as opposed to working from home, it's going to be hard. I've kept 1000's of hours as mine that have not been spent commuting, dealing with office clothes, etc. And I've gotten very used to it.

Anyone ever try keeping a time diary? Like one would keep to track what they eat, or what they spend? I think it would be interesting. Recently I've been reading much more, and I've started a MITx class online - and I would have sworn to you I did not have time to do either. But they're getting done, so the time is coming from somewhere, but I could not tell you from where.

SteveinMN
10-20-12, 12:45pm
I realize that I have to go in right now and spend at least an hour doing up breakfast, emptying the dishwasher, washing the pots and pans by hand (does anybody put these through the dishwasher? seems like a waste of space but oh I am tempted sometimes). It would be great to have more of a system there. Or a slave boy :D
I'm the slave boy in this household :welcome: Actually, I don't feel that way at all (see below).

As for pots and pans, our big stock pot won't physically fit in the dishwasher. Other pots/pans have coatings that make automatic dishwashing a not-smart thing to do. And all the pots take up a lot of space. I'd rather clean one big pot in the sink than wash six dishes which otherwise would have fit in the dishwasher. I am careful to make sure that pots soak when they need to -- sometimes filling with water as soon as they're empty. That saves lots of scrubbing and soaping later.


It seems like I've learned/implemented so many things, and done so many tweaks to myself over the past decade or two in order to be happier, healthier, stronger, that I sometimes get burned out, and think "If I have to do one more self-improvement thing I'm going to scream." Is this weird?
I don't think it's weird at all. I long ago tired of the churn generated by mastering perhaps 80% of something new and then jetting off to The Next Big Thing. There is no shame in taking time to perfect a technique (or two or three) or even thinking of sitting out for a time as a kind of sabbatical from continual learning.

That's one reason I don't mind being the "slave boy" in the house. There's no rocket science in anything I do in the house, though I am taking the time to re-examine how we do errands and what tasks it makes sense to pursue, now that the time-money equation has been upended. For example, I've become a little more catholic (small c) in where food ingredients come from. If I need to buy something outside of a regular grocery run, I'd prefer to buy it from our food co-op. But I won't fire up the car and drive 4 miles round-trip for one or two items. I'll walk three blocks to the local supermarket. I can use the exercise, they can use the business, my car does not need one more short-hop drive, and one non-organic manufactured food product is not going to kill us. I never would have gotten to this point if I was always striving for the next goal.

fidgiegirl
10-20-12, 5:04pm
If there's any sense of obligation, you need to stop.

Yes! Thank you Tammy and Steve, this is so important . . . . I as well have used this one as a factor. It was sad for me because I realized that several things I was doing were not out of want but out of "well, no one else will . . . " And once I let those go, life got a lot better.