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jennipurrr
3-19-13, 11:56am
A friend on FB shared this and I thought some here may appreciate it also.

http://www.rageagainsttheminivan.com/2013/03/lets-bring-holidays-down-notch.html

I totally agree with the sentiment...celebrating all these random holidays is overwhelming to me and I don't even have children. I can't even think abount managing their expectations in this commercial society.

decemberlov
3-19-13, 12:15pm
Amen to that!! Thanks for sharing.

Here's what we do in our home:

Valentine's Day - I design and print Valentines for my little one to take to school (free - since I work at a print shop!) & 1 lolly pop or pencil for each. My older daughter doesn't care about giving out Valentines.
Easter - I reuse the same bowl for each every year and fill it will spring stuff - new sidewalk chalk, a new jump rope maybe, new flip flops all things that will get used - no candy.
Christmas - We usually do just immediate family - this year we decided not to buy anything for anyone, no even the kids. We want to use our money to go on a family vacation (maybe a cruise) and create memories instead of more junk in the house.

And that's about it...oh and Thanksgiving but no one really expects you to buy anything - except maybe a pie ;)

mtnlaurel
3-19-13, 1:07pm
Totally appreciated it - thank you. I really like her blog.

It's funny because the Leprechauns did 'sneaky things' at my dd's preschool... knocked over some trash cans and other mischief, it made a real impression on her.
Latter that day we were running errands and the store we were in was in desperate need of straightening & restocking and my daughter said, "Look the Leprechauns have been here too!"
we started looking around and Leprechauns had been all over the place once we started looking for messes :)

We actually did a little more for St. Patrick than normal this year and it was fun.
I made corned beef & cabbage and it was delish!

I am a Good Times Junkie and can make an event out of just about anything with very little effort or $$.
But if something becomes Not Fun, I am NOT doing it.
(I can make obligations fun, but if it becomes too difficult then I really have to look at those "obligations" and weigh what will happen if I stop doing them)

I could so relate to her post (I thought she may have lived in my area I could so relate, but she's in SoCal) - and it's for real about candy with each valentine is the new norm.
We don't do that and it was noticed by my son this year. To which I say, Nope we don't do that.
I am sure that will get kiboshed though by the schools - my kid's schools are starting to really crack down on sweets....

Now I do make homemade, family recipe treats for all teachers/coaches at Christmas & end of school year --- but I enjoy that, so I do it.

I think it's the Pinterest-a-zation of motherhood/womanhood or something.... some strange Martha Stewart of the next generation type phenomenon.

I think her words on the perfect day ring true in our household...
"Today I gave all of my kids a bath. We read with each of them for the recommended 20 minutes. We reviewed our Math Facts. We practiced guitar. We sat together at the table and ate a meal that was NOT procured at a drive-thru. We played outside. Most days, I’m struggling to achieve all these things."

Some days all it takes is I Gave the Kids a Bath, to put a day in the Win category!

Rosemary
3-19-13, 3:42pm
I hear you. All the holiday excess, both on individual holidays and in terms of all the extra holidays, is too much for me. We have a pretty low-key household. We make our own valentines (with no candy or cheap gadgets attached), DD gets a couple of small items in an Easter basket (we don't do candy) and some coins in hidden eggs, we share Thanksgiving with other small families from our church, and Christmas is festive with lots of family. Her birthday is a big celebration (she gets to pick what kind of cake and a favorite dinner, and a small party or special activity with family), and we celebrate our parental birthdays with just homemade cards and a meal at a favorite restaurant. That's pretty much it.

The highlight for DD and me of every day is when we sit down to read together before her bedtime. We used to read aloud to each other but now we read silently together. This is what she will remember, this time to connect silently or in conversation, open time together.

redfox
3-19-13, 3:53pm
I loved this! A friend posted it on FB, and the over-functioning parent so reminded me of my stepkids' mom. She still sends presents to her adult kids for every freaking quasi-holiday. Oy vey. So driven by consumer culture, and I find it repulsive... I mean, how many stuffed bunnies, junk candy, etc. does one need? None.

Lainey
3-19-13, 9:49pm
I agree the frenzy is being whipped up by our commercial media, and then the business news reports on the monetary aspect of every holiday: "Easter sales were disappointing as candy and other merchandise did not move as expected ..." yadda yadda
Geez, now every holiday is scrutinized for its bottom line, and we get blamed for society's financial mess if we don't partake in the holiday madness.

sweetana3
3-20-13, 6:02am
I don't like the commercialism but sometimes it can be fun. For example, this is the first Easter Mom has been close enough to get together. We are having a dinner together at her apartment (her idea and Easter the excuse). I found a small children's pop up book on Splat the Cat does Easter for $2 for a card. She likes cute things she can share with others.

But no decoration, candy, other celebrations, etc. For my birthday, we are having breakfast out and I am checking out the quilting store that gives me a 30% discount on my birthday. May not buy anything but it is enough to make me feel special.

frugalone
11-18-13, 8:39pm
Amen!

Ahh The Simple Name
11-19-13, 11:29am
Here's my reply: Simplify the Holidays Your Way http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/simplify-the-holidays-your-way/
excerpt:



http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Christmas-Tree-300x225.jpg (http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Christmas-Tree.jpg)Photo by cassie_bedfordgolf available under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial license
Gifts

No gifts at all! Yes, that's what you read! I have a brief story to support this argument. I have some friends, a couple named J. and C., who used to re-wrap the same gifts to each other every Christmas. Now they have chosen to only give to charities at Christmas. Why? They believe that most of us have way more than we need, and therefore it's better to give to those who really do need.
Buy gifts from SERRV (http://www.serrv.org/category/shop). This is a nonprofit organization with a mission to eradicate poverty wherever it resides by providing opportunity and support to artisans and farmers worldwide.

http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/SERRV-Gift.jpg (http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/SERRV-Gift.jpg)SERRV Catnip Basket


Buy Kutoa Health Bars. Watch this video:
http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-includes/js/tinymce/themes/advanced/img/trans.gif


Tweet this : Buy a bar, feed a child. http://wp.me/p3oX18-17R (https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=Tweet%20this%20%3A%20Buy%20a%20bar%2C%2 0feed%20a%20child.%20http%3A%2F%2Fwp.me%2Fp3oX18-17R%20KUTOA%20%E2%80%9Cto%20give%E2%80%9D%20in%20S wahili) KUTOA “to give” in Swahili


Make a donation to World Vision (http://www.worldvision.org/about-us/who-we-are). You can make a donation, and get a free handcrafted gift for your loved one: Handcrafted Gifts (http://donate.worldvision.org/OA_HTML/xxwv2ibeCCtpSctDspRte.jsp?section=10371). Alternatively, you can donate a gift in your loved one's name, as explained in this short video:http://www.ahhthesimplelife.com/wp-includes/js/tinymce/themes/advanced/img/trans.gif

Tweet this : Our vision for every child, life in all its fullness Our prayer for every heart, the will to make it so. http://wp.me/p3oX18-17R (https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=Our%20vision%20for%20every%20child%2C%2 0life%20in%20all%20its%20fullness%20Our%20prayer%2 0for%20every%20heart%2C%20the%20will%20to%20make%2 0it%20so.%20http%3A%2F%2Fwp.me%2Fp3oX18-17R%20%20World%20Vision) World Vision


The Huffington Post has many posts on gifts that give back. Start here: Gif (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tag/gifts-that-give-back)

ApatheticNoMore
11-19-13, 12:14pm
I'm thinking of doing a no shopping month, where I stock up on food and literally don't even buy any food or household products except for fresh produce. I've thought of it as a way to avoid holidays crowds and madness and the thought itself was so calming. I've probably done no discretionary spending month for thansksgiving to xmas for the last 2 or 3 years (protesting materialism). But this year if I really want something: I am allowed online shopping :). But nothing can make the maddening crowds appealing. And the thought of even avoiding the grocery for the most part is so peaceful (since even it is so crowded and crazy this time of year - plus the incessant holiday music!). I'll spend the time in nature instead :).

Zoebird
11-24-13, 8:40am
I'll be honest, we have been lucky to not have crazy holidays, but this year we are really celebrating. And we are making gifts.

Unlike prior years with a combination of insane busy-ness and flipped seasons, we have holidays. We do celebrate them, but it's always been casual. Now that DS is five, I decided to make a little more effort with it.

First, I created an advent-style event calendar. I used inexpensive (free!) envelopes and paper. DH and I created a daily calendar, with our various holidays and the activities around them.

As ever, we focus on experiences rather than gifts, though gift-giving is really important for the extended family, and so we are making gifts for people.

So, here are our holidays:

1. St Nicholas Day (6 Dec);
2. Bodhi Day (8 Dec);
3. Firebird Festival (14 Dec);
4. Jul/Yule (21/22 Dec);
5. Christmas (24/25 Dec);
6 New Years Eve/Day (31 Dec/1 Jan).

So, we have 6 holidays to celebrate. We follow a sort-of waldorf fashion: the main focus is on rituals. The kiddo loves rituals, and seeing them in-action at the waldorf school was always really cool. So, here we go.

Dec 1-5: making our holiday decorations and gift-crafts. Previous years involved going out and picking flowers and pohutukawa for our decorations -- as this was a nice summer activity. This year, I'm doing a "snowflake" theme and we're using wet-on-wet painting. We are doing wet-on-wet painting with a couple of new friends and family on Dec 1, and then we're going to cut them into snowflakes once they dry. I'll put these on string to make garland, and we're going to hang it around the different rooms of the house. I'm also using some of the paintings to make an image of the buddha under the bodhi tree, and also to make christmas tree ornaments.

We're making meditation jars as gifts -- it's a simple project and they are quite mesmerizing. :) My friend taught me how and I love the darn thing, and so does DS. It actually does engage him in meditation (swirl the jar, watch the glitter float around, and when the glitter settles, you are finished with meditation -- we have a 5 minute meditation jar for DS now).

Dec 6, we tell the story of St Nick and how he gave to the needy. We are making little paper sacks (with snowflake tag) with gingerbread cookies, tangerines, and candy canes. Then, we're giving these to our neighbors, and also to DS's young cousin. We're doing the "sneaky" method -- of just leaving it at the doorstep. Some folks knock on the door or ring the bell and run, but I find that scary, personally, so we're just leaving the packages by the door. Each has a little story of St Nick, too -- explaining the tradition of our family. Then, DS will receive a little food-gift (slightly different than the ones he made) in the morning.

Dec 7, we are attending a winter festival at the waldorf school, then that evening, setting up for Bodhi Day. We tell most of the story of the buddha's journey, leaving him at the bodhi tree to meditate for the last night before enlightenment.

Dec 8, we rise before dawn, look for venus to rise, put the 'star' on our buddha image that we put up, and then light the candles and go through that ritual. We have rice and warm milk as the morning meal (same as the buddha), then bodhi tree cookies and tea (heart shaped cookies). Those will be gingerbread, too.

Dec 9-12 we will be visiting the austrian-style market and getting some treats (traditional foods) and just enjoying the sights.

Dec 13-16 we are traveling to my parents to enjoy the firebird festival. this is a big deal in our family -- and I'm so glad to be able to go back again! The thing that is nice here is that we can do things simply -- basically two travel days and what fun those can be, and then two days of excitement -- 14th is the Firebird, 15th we're going to longwood gardens for their holiday lights and festivities.

Dec 17- 20 we prepare the gifts and decorations for my parent's visit (over Jul/Yule). This will involve putting up and decorating the christmas tree. So, there's going to be a hike looking for pine cones, which we'll then make into scented ornaments for the tree, plus also making citrus pomanders, and our paper snowflakes.

Dec 20- 23 my parents are going to be here for the Jul time, we're going to be doing a lot of normal christmas activities with them -- including lights at the phipps conservatory (gardens), and a few other things (I don't really know, and need to talk to my mom/sister). But, over Jul, we're going to talk about the solstice and have a sun cake.

Dec 24-26 will be nice and quiet -- we'll probably just go for another hike or enjoy quiet time. We are really enjoying hiking in Frick park. We're just discovering it. And, the Frick mansion will be decorated for a gilded age christmas, so that might be an enjoyable activity on 26 Dec.

Then 27-29 Dec, my ILs will be visiting for their christmas, and we have some activities planned there, too.

Then Dec 30-31 we will be preparing for the new year, including a "countdown at noon" for my nephew, son, and a few friends of theirs.

Then 1 January, we have our lucky year meal.

catherine
11-24-13, 9:34am
I thought it was a really cute post! I was just bummed that she felt the need to tack on an addendum to address people who were supposedly "offended"--hey, if the shoe fits, wear it. It was a cute tongue-in-cheek piece--get over it, people! And I loved her valentine :devil:


As a parent, it is stressful keeping up with everything. My kids are long out of school, but I have lots of memories of the stress that comes with having to keep up with holidays and field trips and birthday/cupcake day, and all that stuff, so I totally related.

This year, because of my financial situation, I am definitely going to suggest to the fam that we take it down a notch. I'm thinking suggesting either:
--Make a gift or give a handmade gift (like from Etsy)
--Limit spending to $30 a person
--Present a gift (my family loves to perform so there would be no shortage of volunteers there)

In my experience the handmade gifts my kids have given the family (because they were on a tight budget) were the absolute BEST. One year, my oldest son (who was about 20 at the time) had no money so he went out and got 5 lbs. of clay and made each of us a little thing with a little story/tag attached. Each thing was personalized--so my DS, who just got her first job, got a business card holder, I LOVE sushi, so I got a chopsticks holder, etc. The little tags were so funny and personal, and we each read them out loud and laughed our butts off. What could be better than that?

We're going to VT this year so that also cuts down on home decor stress. (Although I just got word that DS & pregnant DIL are going to move in with us for a few months, so that does motivate me to spiff up the house for them).

Anyhow, cute article..

sweetana3
11-24-13, 11:46am
The only reason we even acknowledge holidays is because Mom moved here and she enjoys decorating her apartment. We do no tree, no decorations (although I have 6 crates of homemade ones), no special meals. I do buy/make some simple presents for a few special people but only because I enjoy it. No traditional buying.

We love books for presents. I also made pillowcase sets for the young kids with fabric chosen for them. This might be a tradition.

frugalone
11-24-13, 12:17pm
This thread reminds me of something. When I was a kid, I went to a Catholic school run by nuns from a Slovak order. They told us that if we left our shoes out on Dec. 6, St. Nicholas would fill them with candy.

My mom told me years later that she was fit to be tied and mad at the nuns for telling us that. Because she felt she had to go along with it so we'd continue believing in Santa/St. Nick, and it was just another expense for her in a one-income, five-person household that she could ill afford!