http://www.simplelivingforum.net/ Financial Integrity / Simple Living discussion forums provided by the New Road Map Foundation. en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 22:30:24 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.simplelivingforum.net/images/misc/rss.png http://www.simplelivingforum.net/ http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8252-insensitive-supervisor&goto=newpost Fri, 24 May 2013 15:27:08 GMT argh, so my weekly meeting went okay yesterday and I did't think much of it at the time but this insensitive comment is really sticking with me. I think it sticks with me because this is my supervisor and it shows a bias toward the populations we work with (and me in some way).

I was saying that our program hasn't had a lot of niceness,but one of our very young boys was so cute. He decided to call me cookie, and so I now call him cupcake. When I walk into the room we exchange cookie and cupcake nicknames. Sweet huh, during a week of 2 suspensions and social services call it made me happy. So sup says he must be from a 2 parent family where he sees this behavior modeled for him from dad to mom. I told her the reality, his dad lives in Argentina now because he is terminally ill and mom has little to no family here. Many of our schools are in the 90% free and reduced lunch category, lots of struggling and single parent families. That assumption does affect the programming we offerr

I want to ask HR if there is sensitivity training but the last perrson who went to HR with a concern had it all basically get around the office quickly. Plus this person is MY boss instead of the other way around. Really that is part of what bugs me most of all. I feel in our weekly meetings that half the time I am educating her and not getting credit for that. Other than that, people just say stupid stuff. ]]> Zoe Girl http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8252-insensitive-supervisor http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8251-I-5-bridge-collapse-in-WA-state&goto=newpost Fri, 24 May 2013 04:01:14 GMT I have driven this literally thousands of times. Insanity. ... I have driven this literally thousands of times. Insanity.

http://blogs.seattletimes.com/today/...-skagit-river/ ]]> Transportation redfox http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8251-I-5-bridge-collapse-in-WA-state http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8250-Free-tutorial-on-making-doll-clothes-kimono&goto=newpost Fri, 24 May 2013 03:26:47 GMT Really cute and think you could adapt this pattern to make other clothing... ... Really cute and think you could adapt this pattern to make other clothing...


http://www.lovehobbycraft.com/learni...nutes-251.html ]]> Tussiemussies http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8250-Free-tutorial-on-making-doll-clothes-kimono http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8248-make-do-tomato-supports&goto=newpost Thu, 23 May 2013 15:25:49 GMT So I have in 7 tomato plants! Yeah, I had cages for 2 of them and the others I can't buy this week, just not more important than food and actually a counseling session that is essential. So my yard has a million sticks from this giant tree. I probably pick up more sticks than mow the yard. I set up one stick with each tomato plant for now, they are 4-5 inches high. I am wondering if others have advice? I can use more sticks easily and make a teepee style support with yarn. I hate to buy a bunch of metal cages when I have materials all over my yard already!

I did figure out the bean plant location in the back of the yard next to a chain link fence, that should be perfect for support. I wonder if I can mix those with some wildflowers to be pretty? There is a strip of really decent soil that used to have flowering plants. in a drought year I want to mostly water food plants. ]]> Zoe Girl http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8248-make-do-tomato-supports http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8247-How-do-you-react-to-life&goto=newpost Thu, 23 May 2013 13:09:31 GMT I think that there is a lot of merit in this thinking regardless of who actually coined the actual words. What do you think? Found on ... I think that there is a lot of merit in this thinking regardless of who actually coined the actual words. What do you think?

Found on
http://lifehacker.com/5873131/life-i...97426#comments

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:

"I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element.

It is my personal approach that creates the climate.

It is my daily mood that makes the weather.

I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous.

I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal.

In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or dehumanized.

If we treat people as they are, we make them worse.

If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming."

Caveat: Also attributed to Dr. Haim G. Ginott, with slightly different wording.

But the message is the same, and a VERY powerful one if you can adjust your mindset to live by it. (I certainly wish I could do better.) 1 ]]> razz http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8247-How-do-you-react-to-life http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8246-When-you-work-hard-and-don-t-see-any-results&goto=newpost Thu, 23 May 2013 00:15:48 GMT I am usually a happy person but today I kinda got side tracked. I've started a new job and had to use all paychecks to pay off debts and bills. I am glad to do that- however my job will be done for the summer. I am a school bus driver, I will have freedom along with the students, but no checks until Sept. I just feel all the hard work I always put into my daily life, I just don't see any big results, yet the effort is huge to get out of a rut. Today I thought-why bother? I am still in debt and a long way to go. I just wanted to have something to enjoy. Even though I am relieved to pay off certain big debts and money well spent in that department-I feel shortchanged because I wanted something enjoyable out of it( new floor in basement etc.). Next school year I will be paying off my cc's with every paycheck and maybe my car payments too. But that is a year away.....:(Until then. ]]> Dailies and Challenges sylvia http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8246-When-you-work-hard-and-don-t-see-any-results http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8245-Win-a-new-deck-from-Thompson-Water-Seal-15-000-00&goto=newpost Wed, 22 May 2013 21:21:39 GMT I was reading over Mrs.M.'s post and went to the link of Thomas Water Seal and saw they are having a deck sweepstake in the amount of $15,000.00. Thought some may want to enter but you do have to include your full address...


http://www.thompsonswaterseal.com/promotions/ ]]> Open Forum Tussiemussies http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8245-Win-a-new-deck-from-Thompson-Water-Seal-15-000-00 http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8244-FAST-5-2-Recipe-resources&goto=newpost Wed, 22 May 2013 16:02:58 GMT I have a friend coming to stay for a week who is eating on the FAST 5:2 eating plan. She will want to eat as healthily as possible on both the 5... I have a friend coming to stay for a week who is eating on the FAST 5:2 eating plan. She will want to eat as healthily as possible on both the 5 and the 2 days. What are the best resources for learning how to cook like this for her? ]]> Amaranth http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8244-FAST-5-2-Recipe-resources http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8243-I-am-starting-to-count-the-days!&goto=newpost Wed, 22 May 2013 15:13:11 GMT Twenty-five days until my road trip out west!!!!!!!!! I have decided to end up in near Taos, Bandolier National Monument, Jemez Springs and Santa Fe... Twenty-five days until my road trip out west!!!!!!!!! I have decided to end up in near Taos, Bandolier National Monument, Jemez Springs and Santa Fe area. I only have two weeks to drive there and back from Michigan, so I will have to be realistic in my expectations. I have been to these areas in the past; it usually takes me three long days of driving to get there but since my *new* car is so much more comfortable, the driving part out won't be as hard on me, I hope.

I am getting my camping gear in order, and the car is being checked out today for her maiden Siouxz.Q voyage.

I'm still trying to figure out which route to take - should I head west via I-80 to Des Moines (I used to live in Iowa City so it is a trip I have made many, many times) and hop on I-35 south to Kansas City and Wichita, then SW on State Highway 54 to eastern Colorado or should I head south to Indiananapolis from Michigan and hook up to I-70 through St. Louis and Kansas City, etc...I really don't like driving through Kansas (don't mean to offend anyone who lives there, but it is very boring to me)! The alternative is to head to Lincoln, NB on I-80 and use State Highway 34 to get to eastern Colorado and then drop south for a nice drive through the mountains to the Santa Fe area. I'll have to check out my notes from previous trips - I generally take more scenic and interesting routes on the way to someplace for the adventure factor, and then drive like he** to get home on the way back. I usually use I-40 east from New Mexico to Oklahoma City and then I-44 to I-70 start heading north to return home.

Anyway, it's all part of the adventure of it and I may change my mind many times in the coming weeks! ]]> SiouzQ. http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8243-I-am-starting-to-count-the-days! http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8242-Hannibal-anyone&goto=newpost Wed, 22 May 2013 03:34:44 GMT When I heard about the show Hannibal, I was really interested because it's a Bryan Fuller show (Pushing Daisies, Dead Like Me). It's got me hooked. I find the Hannibal character so fascinating and played so well by Mads Mikkelson (sp?). I'm always studying his face and eyes, looking for his reaction to different things.

It is a bit gory, but watching him prepare gourmet meals of human organs for friends is addictive in a strange way.

Anyone else? ]]> Reviews pony mom http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8242-Hannibal-anyone http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8241-Airbnb-ruled-illegal-in-NYC&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 23:28:23 GMT "Airbnb, arguably the world’s most popular crowdsourced hospitality site, was ruled illegal in New York City today. It’s a tough break for the site, recently valued at $2.5 billion, that makes it cheaper for tourists to visit cities and stay in apartments located out of typically dull business districts."

Read the whole article here:
Airbnb ruled illegal in NYC

I'm planning on putting my cabin on Airbnb - I hope there are no changes in California! (I would be willing to pay tax - though it would probably become a bureaucratic mess.) ]]> Housing Gardenarian http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8241-Airbnb-ruled-illegal-in-NYC http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8240-Walking-a-tightrope-with-our-FB-fans-when-can-I-block&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 19:34:17 GMT I work in a public-facing job, where part of the job is keeping in touch with the fans of the radio station I work for. Mostly it's been fun to post things to our page and get nice comments and respond back. Communicating with people in a positive way is one of the refreshing things about this job. Sometimes I feel like I get along with our fans better than I do with my own co-workers.

Anyway, occasionally this will turn sour when I'll start to be hounded by some weird dude (it's usually a guy) for months on end, either on Facebook or via email. One man told me (interspersed with installments of his life story over many messages) that our radio show was the only thing keeping him alive. After four or five further communications where he emphasized his depression and suicidal thoughts, I looked up what to tell people in these situations. I told the guy to 1) tell someone he actually knows that he's having the thoughts, and 2) contact a therapist or call a center where the staff are trained to deal with suicide-related issues. This guy had also become critical and hostile to me, so I signed and off and let him know that I would no longer be responding to his messages. I blocked him on Outlook, and haven't heard from him since. I do have lingering feelings of guilt which are pretty much unexplainable, other than that I somehow feel I failed the guy or let him down. (Which is just what he wanted me to think, probably...)

Variations of this kind of message harassment have continued, and I know that part of it is just being in a public-facing job. But I'm wondering whether I could do better at handling people who won't stop messaging me with demands, criticisms, complaints, etc.

Right now I'm receiving daily messages on Facebook from a guy named Mars. He's a listener and a contributor, which he constantly stresses. His holy grail is apparently the chance to go to happy hour with me and my husband. I've let him know that I'm in a busy time in my life, and I won't be able to do this. He responds with, "That's okay, let me know when you're available." Every day he sails in with, "Love your voice, it's so sultry." Pretty creepy. As my responses have gotten shorter, he has gotten annoyed - has now upped his strategy to criticism. "My friend thinks you sound breathy." I told him that after fifteen years in broadcasting I didn't give a crap what his friend thinks, and realized that I had done something unprofessional and got sucked into something I should have extricated myself from long ago.

This morning the guy messages me and says, "I think I saw your husband walking on 4th and Wall." This freaked me the hell out, because I've NEVER met this guy. My hubby is on Facebook and works for another radio station, so large swathes of his life are an open book. But this just sqwicked me out. What is he, driving by where we work all the time to get glimpses of us? And why?

So - I want to block this guy. I've blocked a couple people in the past, and nobody firebombed my house. I'm at the point where I want to do this, but I'm worried. And I don't even know why. I guess I'm afraid of retaliation.

When I stopped responding to a previous frequent emailer a few months ago, the guy freaked out and sent a five-page letter to the owner of the station, complaining about my behavior. The letter just proved the guy was a whackjob, and nobody told me I should be nicer to these freaks or anything like that. But I'm worried about blowback at work when I stand up for myself, or make a move like blocking someone. People always know when you do this, because they can't message you on FB anymore.

(sigh) I know I just have to block this guy. But as a person whose every move is measured by my employers in terms of our brand, I've been reluctant to do this. I guess I could just use some encouragement around this. Feeling a bit weak and discouraged lately, not at all capable of fighting the good fight right now... ]]> kitten http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8240-Walking-a-tightrope-with-our-FB-fans-when-can-I-block http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8239-tiered-priorities&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 18:30:09 GMT Right now I am waaay over my head at work. We have been given so many things to do over the year that i cannot keep it straight, I am preparing to... Right now I am waaay over my head at work. We have been given so many things to do over the year that i cannot keep it straight, I am preparing to run a summer camp at our school which is extra pay and I do need this money however I am ready to tell my supervisor I don't want the job after all. I will work at the local amusement park instead! So my deep thought today was about 'tiered priorities' concept and presenting that to my boss to explain some the issue we are all having as a team meeting deadlines and managing competing work interests.

I figure someone out there has an idea of what I am talking about and maybe has a reference that relates. The situation in our department is that we have a process with deadlines to improve each of our childcare sites, the district wants personal goals for many of us and to show progress, our grant based site have 4-5 surveys, summer camp needs major planning, and our department has had 10 criticial incidents (child left on playground and staff does not notice) so we are focusing on child safety big time.

RIght now each one has been presented with extreme urgency and the consequences to us can be high. I want to talk to my supervisor about telling us how they really add up in importance. Of course no one wants to drop an improvement plan however safety and making sure the tasks related to continued funding are a bigger priority. I want to talk about how 'good enough' summer plans are reasonable, I have been working really hard on those and missed some emails about first aid and CPR classes that are mandatory and staff will be turned away for being late even if it is their work schedule.

Okay enough thought, back to work ]]> Zoe Girl http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8239-tiered-priorities http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8238-BK-are-you-as-sick-of-this-as-I-am&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 16:48:49 GMT I just found out that the settlement is still on the table until June 16th by the collection agency. I just need in writing that my ex will not sue... I just found out that the settlement is still on the table until June 16th by the collection agency. I just need in writing that my ex will not sue me. I called his lawyer today to see if I can get that, or if he is planning on suing me. I think this could be a good deal, it is worth something to feel I was not manipulated or bullied into BK when I had worked out a deal that I felt good about.

Over the assets, I understand on advice of an attorney what they can account for in the overal deal. I don't really have anything that is able to be hidden, not that I would. The worksheet is thorough, like asking about money owed to me or if I am expecting certain assets in the near future. I don't have a business so nothing is complicated.

You guys are totally awesome, I will take you all out for virtual ice cream when this is handled and I have financially recovered!! ]]> Personal Finance Zoe Girl http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8238-BK-are-you-as-sick-of-this-as-I-am http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8237-A-Shoutout-to-Facebook&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 13:21:28 GMT I have a large population of family members living in all parts of Oklahoma City. After the storms yesterday all of them, and all of us from... I have a large population of family members living in all parts of Oklahoma City. After the storms yesterday all of them, and all of us from elsewhere, were able to post on Facebook and within a few hours all the family was accounted for. Love it or hate it Facebook did provide a way for us to do that in a few hours where years ago it would probably have taken days. Disclaimer, we didn't have any kind of family phone tree set up which would have made phones considerably more efficient. Anyway, it was good to know they are safe and mind boggling to see the pictures of the damage. ]]> Open Forum Gregg http://www.simplelivingforum.net/showthread.php?8237-A-Shoutout-to-Facebook