Were you ever in debt? How did you pay everyone back?

[catherine]

I've had a few cycles of indebtedness. I'm wondering what karma am I working off here?? I know I am responsible for the debt, and I accept that. But I truly am, at my core, a simple liver. I always have been.. I was happy being a companion for my greataunt as a teen when my friends were getting jobs so they could buy cool clothes (I made my own). I cried when my mother bought a second TV. All of my furniture is second hand (except for a first-hand couch that my MIL bought us for our 25th wedding anniversary 12 years ago).

So I constantly ask, what's a nice girl like me doing in a place like this?

I managed to pay off $120,000 worth of debt a couple of years ago.. with the help of Dave Ramsey. And then we inherited a house in the midst of the housing crisis. For that reason (and a few others), I have regenerated that debt. Yes, I would have done things differently if I could, like letting that darned house go to foreclosure.

Truly, I need to sell my own house, but I get resistance from DH. I may veto his decision at some point. My life is worth more than a house.

So, I am still in debt, and as always, I'm scrambling to find my way out. Thanks for the inspiration.

[rodeosweetheart]

We were in debt because we were living beyond our means, buying a house where we took on two mortgages. Sold that house, went back to our paid for house, lived there another two years, had about 30000 of remaining medical debt and consumer debt. Sold the paid for house, moved to a foreclosure with no plumbing, heat, animal excrement on the walls and floors (that was, admittedly, a lowpoint--bathing in a 5 gallon drum bucket after a day of scraping, in 90 degree heat) paid for travel to son's wedding and dh's surgery copay with cash, worked 5 jobs between us (still do), did all work on house ourselves, lived without central heat and air for 2 years, and worked our way back up to having savings.

I hate debt and do not ever want to go there again; would make it a deal breaker in teh relationship--debt to me is as damaging as alcohol to the alcoholic. Dave Ramsey and Debtor's anonymous taught me that truth about myself. I have a lot of denial around money and a strong desire to spend money in what i perceive to be taking care of others and "doing the right thing."

I have to be on watch for that, personally.

[catherine]

-debt to me is as damaging as alcohol to the alcoholic. Dave Ramsey and Debtor's anonymous taught me that truth about myself. I have a lot of denial around money and a strong desire to spend money in what i perceive to be taking care of others and "doing the right thing."

I have to be on watch for that, personally.

Wow. I so relate to that, rodeosweetheart.

[awakenedsoul]

I agree, too. Louise Hay refers to debt as an addiction. I never understood that until I got out. I've been out of debt for about four years, and I feel like I got my self back. Before, all I need was worry and scurry about money...

[ToomuchStuff]

I understand the debt being like alcohol (temptation), but to me, debt would be a symptom, not a disease. I think in part, it is how one is exposed to money and raised.
I have NEVER understood using debt to live l lifestyle beyond ones means, or how one gains huge credit limits that allow them to do so. Debt is a tool, like income is a tool, to me, at least.
Lesson's I learned that may have affected this were:
Food or stuff (as a kid, I could use my lunch money for lunch, or save it up for stuff/movie/etc. Was almost my only income until 16. Other income would have been birthday/Christmas money, or the money I on occasion got paid for mowing grandma's lawn; that got used to by things needed to fix stuff over there)
At 18, was responsible for myself (was interested in the case of the daughter suing parents for school, because I have never understood how a judge orders divorced parents to pay (at least part) of continuing education, and no other parents are responsible for that). I think this one is the one that would make kids realize they don't start out where their parents currently are.
Exposure to various income levels. (still exposed to this one, highest earning friend (not knowing everyone's income), makes what I make in a year, in around 10 days)

[larknm]

I got out of debt, besides mortgage, by folloing Your Money or Your Life, these boards, and Trent Hamm.

[Teacher Terry]

I never had debt until about 7 years ago when my hubby & I got the not so brilliant idea to buy rental property. Well prices & rents plummeted and then not wanting to admit defeat we spent all our savings trying to save the situation and then went into CC debt trying to maintain. Eventually we had to shortsale all 3 properties. Fortunately at the time we had good jobs so we cut everything possible out of our budget and just paid off all the debt. It took about 3 years. We then saved enough $ to pay cash for a small price because the real estate hit bottom at about that time. Then my hubby got laid-off & unable to find another job. We were stupid & I never intend to do anything risky again. We are just lucky we came out of it ok.

[Selah]

I got into major credit card/car loan debt. I stopped spending, joined these forums, read every single book (from the library or by reading it at a book store) on personal finance I could find, did the debt snowball, and did a bazillion other things to minimize my spending and maximize my income. Finally did it, then was stuck with a house that was $66K upside down. FINALLY arranged a short sale which the bank agreed to. DH finished paying off his child support at about the same time, and now we're almost completely debt free except for our car loan, which only has about two more years to go. Whee! I NEVER want to go back to those days of constantly having to worry about my debt and be carrying that burden around!

[Rogar]

Other a car loans and a home loan, both of which were paid off early, I've not had much debt and have never had a credit card other than a debit card drawing from my bank account.

I lived at home during my first couple of years of college and when I went away to finish a degree my expenses were roughly a 50/50 split between great parents and part time jobs. I had roommates during a few post college years and then rented for several years to save money a for a large home down payment. When I bought my home I actually had to get letters from the utility companies and landlord saying I paid bills on time, because I had zero credit references.

I attribute much of my debt free life to simple and frugal living, but I can easily see where debt or significant debt could be virtually unavoidable for folks who marry and have a family early in their careers.

[awakenedsoul]

Thanks for all these stories. Seems like the common theme is what a relief it is to be debt free. I remember when I was paying off my SBA loans, I still had a car payment and a credit card. $250.00 a month was going towards interest!!! Once I sat down and figured it out, I realized why I was running through my cash before the end of the month.