Why I didn't take the perfect job

[TxZen]

As y'all know, I am transitioning to a new career. I was toying with the possibility of working 30 hours a week, to get a little income stream and keep my skills up to date. I was offered a position with a home health company, 30 hours a week, Tues-Thurs, answering phone, filing, customer service perfect little job. I turned it down. I sat and thought about it and discussed it with my husband and decided I want to pursue jobs in my new chosen career field. Hubby said that this job would be menial to me, knowing my personality and knowing that I am really striving to make changes in my career. It's the first time I have turned down something because I thought about what I really wanted. Believe me, I am forever grateful for the opportunity but something about taking that job just didn't feel right. What has happened to me?

I will say it just feels off in my gut. I know that is no sole reason to base a decision but for me I truly could not face another office job in healthcare, after doing so for 20 years. The thought made my stomach turn. Please tell me I am not crazy.

[Zoe Girl]

Good choice, and I am glad you have the support of your husband. My mom tried to retire and go back to the front line type work of her career and it was a bad idea, plus no one wanted to hire someone who used to be the boss. It is hard to hold back in career you have experience in.

[TxZen]

Yep I thought about that too. I have been a Director for 16 years. It would be interesting. LOL

[SteveinMN]

Not crazy. You would have hated the job once the novelty wore off. Better to put your energy toward where you want to end up rather than into a point where you never intended to stay.

[ApatheticNoMore]

If I could get a 30 hour job that I could support myself on that I thought was sustainable (ie kept some skills up etc.), I'd give almost anything for that, I worked part time once, I KNOW it's what I want. I don't want fulfillment in work, I want fulfillment in life and for work not to eat it up. I want to spend my time volunteering to make the world better and socializing and learning and NOT spend all of it working and commuting. I don't know I suspect you are crazy Though I don't know how good or bad the job was.

[frugal-one]

You did the right thing. Do what YOU feel is right. Do not second guess yourself. Your hubby was wise in his advice also.

[TxZen]

Just a little crazy...

I went and re-channeled my anxious energy. I have been making up brown lunch bags with PBJ sandwiches, an apple and a small water. I took them to the homeless by the hospital.

I refuse to act on anxiety or worry anymore. I am learning to lean into life rather than try to worry about it.

[Dhiana]

Clearly it was NOT the perfect job for you at this time. Keep focused on looking for one in your newly chosen field!

[fidgiegirl]

I think gut is fine as a sole reason not to do something, or to do it. I have been working hard to listen to my gut. As I'm exploring this idea I just have to be careful, personally, that acting on my gut is not truly acting out of anxiety or fear. Not saying that's what you've done, just where I'm at with this concept right now.

I also think, to ANM's point, that it is sometimes hard for me personally to take this kind of an action because I'm thinking of people like ANM - people who would be grateful to have, in this case, the job in question. It took me a while to come to terms that I needed to leave my most recent former job largely because of this. But in the end I had to tell myself that I am not living anyone else's life, only my own, and that workplace was no longer right for me. I hope someone else finds it to be their dream job.

So glad you shared.

[TxZen]

Totally get it Kelli. I was able to recommend several other people for this job who it would be perfect for. Believe me when I say I am grateful that I have choices and I give thanks everyday for that.

The amount of anxiety I felt was overwhelming. I was about to get physically sick just thinking about doing that type of work again. I know it sounds dramatic but I am really listening to myself from here on out and life is too short not too.