After years of working at it (if "work" is the right word, at a loss for another), I now mostly observe my thoughts from the balcony. Only rarely do they disturb or control me, any more than watching a play disturbs me. For the most part, my life is a series of "nows" that get along reasonably well with their past and future kin.

Occasionally, life is messy and my thoughts are like obnoxious children I wish weren't mine, and would toss off the island if I could.

But not often.

Tonglen meditation helps in those times.