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Thread: when 'taking care of yourself' is cranky?

  1. #1
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    when 'taking care of yourself' is cranky?

    i have no idea how to title this. So when there is stress, especially family stress, the advice is to take care of yourself. But ya know it isn't easy. So i took 2 half days off, mostly dealt with getting plumbing fixed and a flat tire, but i am super happy those are taken care of (the flat was 100% covered). but since i took that time i have a list of emails asking me for something, a lot late or on the edge of it. i had an inspection visit and i made a mistake that is pretty cringeworthy. i was so tired at work my new assistant asked if i was okay. then i snapped at my son for not being home for hours. So yeah, you just suck up that you were crabby and made mistakes and go on i think (okay the process right now is pretty brutal because i keep waking up at night thinking about my daughter or freaking about a work mistake or just wanting cake). i could work 10 hours the next 3 days and maybe be caught up with what i am being asked for, i just don't have a lot of focus right now. Basically like most things the fluffy idea of taking care of yourself is gonna just look crabby and angry and flakey and mistakes made.

    Btw my son was great after i snapped at him. He realized as we talked that no one had told me that DD was checked into the center. i have spent all day waiting, and alone in that tonight. i was supposed to get a call or text from her boyfriend. when my son called him and told him i was having a really hard time then he realized it was important. i got a passed along apology. then my son called his older sister who needed to pick something up from me, she works late and i work early. So he basically got her to come over immediately so i can go to sleep now. it is amazing how a little bit of human contact can start to soothe all this

  2. #2
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    I can relate.

    I'm going through some rough personal life issues and almost stayed home from my teaching job yesterday because I was so upset I was having trouble eating and sleeping. But I went into work anyway and during my first class lost my temper at a student who hadn't done the reading nor brought the book to class, suggesting maybe he didn't need to be there if he hadn't done the reading. He left, and as soon as he did, I thought, "That was out of line of me," especially since it soon became clear there were other students in the class who didn't have the book and hadn't done the reading.

    After class, I sat down to email the student I lost my cool at to say I was wrong, and there was a profanity-laced email from him. I called my boss, told her my mistake, and read the beginning of the email to her, and she rightly I think said I needed to forward it to the Dean of Students, which I did. I emailed the student an apology for my part but told him the language was totally inappropriate. He has since emailed me one more angry email with less profanity, saying he was having personal problems, and I replied again letting him know about the personal counseling on campus.

    Normally, I wouldn't respond to emails like that, but it kills me that I handled the situation in the classroom badly.

    My point is it would have been better for all if I'd taken care of myself at home so that my crankiness wouldn't have been unleashed out to the rest of the world. The student obviously has bigger issues that I'm not responsible for, but he's right that what I did was unfair.

    And though my boss was super-supportive and understanding, this is all happening while I'm on a probationary period at work, which makes it additionally stressful.

    Zoe Girl, I'm sorry you have so many demands on you at such a difficult time and hope I haven't hijacked your thread with my situation. Hang in there.

  3. #3
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    i am really glad you shared. it helps me to know that someone else feels horrified at their part in something even if the other person also responded badly. i had 2 big mistakes yesterday, okay one small one and one big one. i am totally cringing over the big one, not sure what to say since i was in the middle of it and didn't handle it well.

    the stress cycle is that i realize a mistake, i don't have that supportive boss, i get more stressed, i don't sleep, i then get more snappy and stressed, oh yeah.

    i really like having a conversation here! anyone else jump in

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