It is not healthy to depend upon others to take care of you. Unless your parents are rich you are a burden on them. Voc REhab is a fed program run by the states to help people with disabilities return to work. However, you have to want to work. If you don't want to work seek mental health treatment for your problem. Again unless your parents are wealthy & you are not hurting their chances to retire what you are doing is not right.
Yes, and callings and dreams can involve making money and be self-sufficient.Originally Posted by thunderseed
I think there should be a balance, with anything. It's not healthy to be completely reliant on anyone and it's not healthy to be an independent hermit and never accept help from anyone either. And I think it also depends on the situation. Family is supposed to take care of eachother. Hopefully you would take care of your children, grandparent's or relatives if they needed help too. If not, I think you have your priorities messed up, especially if money is more important than the people you love. I don't live in the states.... I want to work, I just don't want to work for money. Right now my parent's are able to give me a few hundred bucks a week, it was their idea not mine, but if the day comes that they can't or won't, I am preparing for it... which I've already said. I would much rather live with nothing and be happy doing what I do (and I have so I know I can do it just fine) than have all these things and be miserable. I know they don't want to give me money forever. And also, my parent's are already retired. They are by no means wealthy but they have enough money to help both me and my sister (my sister is living in victoria and is trying to start up a business but it's not going well) and they can also afford to go on many vacations all the time as well as the fact that they own many houses and even a peice of land.
And come to think of it I don't see why it's so unheard of to let someone else take care of you, since a lot of people do it and they aren't unhealthy people, they are compatible with their partners. For example if you are submissive, find someone dominant.
My mom does it. She doesn't work and relied on my dad to do the working all her life, and honestly I don't see what's wrong with that, raising kids is a tough job on its own. It's not like both partners have to get jobs. Hopefully you would support your partner at least, or at least share your things with them, although I know some people that don't do either and are really territorial over their own things even when they live with their spouse, it's weird.
Even in retirement my dad still goes out and farms for free, because he loved his job. Some people are meant to have paying jobs, others are meant for humanitarian work ... We don't all have to be the same and follow the same rules for living our lives.
No.... realllllly?
personally I think if you want to work you need mental health treatment.If you don't want to work seek mental health treatment for your problem.
Almost everyone hates working. It's not unique to do so, it's everybody. Almost everyone would quit their job if they won the lottery. The way people always talk that if the lottery jackpot was their ticket they wouldn't show up on Monday, illustrates enough about what everyone really thinks about their job. Just like very few people really like to go to the dentist, to do their taxes, colonoscopies, getting surgery, bad traffic, going on a diet. Noone likes those things. People dread the Monday, looks forward to Friday. About maybe 10-20% of the population can have enjoyable jobs. The rest of people have to have jobs that basically suck. Now one can make the best of the suck such as it is, maybe one takes breaks and enjoys the breaks, drinks a tea they like at work, brings a nice lunch, or finds the least boring boring thing to work on (if the job allows that much choice), socializes with coworkers to relieve some boredom etc.. But it gonna kinda suck even so. Really I could tolerate the suck much better if it wasn't so many hours of it ..... it's endless.
Trees don't grow on money
Haha true yet there are some people who really enjoy the suckiest jobs in the world. I don't know how they do it. To each his own, I guess. I swear if anyone's unhappy with their job, there's always time to make a career change, there's even elder college now.
Anyway does anyone have any more organization tips for me? It's the only reason I joined here, want to learn some ideas on how to be more minimal, less messy and live more simply.
It wasn't exceptional today. I failed on a few things actually. I took out a journal to write a list, then went grocery shopping and had a plan to make some new recipes sometime today since I got a new cookbook and was pretty excited to try some new things... I was pretty bummed out to see that my groceries costed 100 dollars today and there's really not a lot of things there, I want to try and see if I can make it last a whole week but I'm not sure if that's possible.
When I got back I saw that I never put the journal and pen back, it was still laying on the table. So I put it back finally... On the plus side I put all the groceries away properly. But I never got around to making any new recipes tonight, I just ate some leftovers and lost the desire to cook. And I didn't clean up my plate yet and don't feel like doing it. It's not going so well.... I'm trying everything everyone suggested and I still don't feel like cleaning and cooking, I just hate those two things, I suppose I can just clean it in the morning when I have breakfast.
I wish I could learn how to enjoy cooking and cleaning, maybe it's just not possible and I have to keep forcing myself to do it.
Thunderseed--I *never* feel like doing certain household tasks. Food shopping--I hate it. It is a tremendous amount of work feeding yourself. You have to make a meal plan, read the sales circulars, make a shopping list, shop (which is a huge pain in the neck), lug it all home, and put it away. And after all that, you still don't have much food you can eat! Now you have to prep, cook, and clean up! And I'm not all that thrilled doing laundry, either.
Some tasks I just do. Whether I feel like doing them or not. I make my bed in the morning because while I don't necessarily enjoy making the bed, I do appreciate how much nicer my bedroom looks with the bed made. Days I leave the bed unmade, I find I avoid using the room because it just looks messy.
I have also streamlined the bed-making process as much as possible. Fitted sheet, flat sheet, a blanket in winter, and a thick, puffy comforter that hides any wrinkles if I don't pull up the blanket and sheet perfectly. Then I plop my two pillows at the head of the bed and I am done.
I don't enjoy washing dishes, but I make myself wash them every night, because I really like it in the morning when the sink is empty and I don't have to deal with dishes first thing.
Putting stuff away right after I use it means that it is where it is supposed to be next time I need it--and I don't have to hunt through piles of stuff for half an hour to find it.
So it's not so much that I enjoy the housework, but that I enjoy the results of doing the housework. So I focus on that, not the boring chores. The more you do these types of chores, the more of a habit they will become, and you will do them without thinking about them. That's when they become easier. But it takes a while to reach that point.
I suppose you could give up on the chores that don't really matter (making the bed would be a prime example). Do you or anyone else who might see it care about it? And at least focus on the chores that do matter first: yes cleaning the dishes would be one of them. I've heard they make things like dishwashers these days, but I wouldn't know (I don't have one). Although doing them by hand is probably least ecological impact (might use more water, but it doesn't involve manufacturing a dishwasher ....). And at least do the chores in order or importance for keeping the house sanitary.
Trees don't grow on money
Not being employed still requires work too, because there are always things that need doing whether you are paid to do them or not. It's part of having self-respect. Deciding NOT to do regular household tasks leads to chaos. Living in an unorganized and confusing state is unstable and dissatisfying - a total negative way of life.
It's just as easy to develop a "good" habit as it is to develop a "bad" habit. It's not about NOT liking or LIKING to do something. It is what it is - part of growing up and being responsible. I had to remind my son from the time he was 4-years old (which is when you make your bed yourself at our house, you start at 2-years making it with help) until he was 9-years old to make his bed. I didn't require much - pull up the blankets and quilt or bedspread and toss the pillow on the top. When he realized it took him less than a minute out of his day to accomplish this task, he realized how dumb he had been about trying to get out of making his bed, and he has continued to make sure his bed is made daily. He also realized how much nicer it is to go to bed when the bed is made, and how he disliked staying all night with his friends who lived in a "mess".
The same goes for doing dishes. We do after-meal clean-up in less than 10-minutes, even when we do all the dishes by hand. We only run our dishwasher once a week.
I've know people who perpetually purchase more clothes just because they can't find the time to do laundry, which only exacerbates the problem by adding more clothes. The family who taught my son violin lessons had no less that 12-inches of dirty laundry heaped on their laundry room floor. I took care of two young boys one summer, and they had two folding banquet-size tables heaped with clothes that needed ironing because they were too busy to remove clothes from the dryer in a timely manner. I told them I would do the ironing for 25-cents a piece, and got "rich" for a 15-year old just doing their ironing.
Life happens, you can make it good or dismal.
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