Apartment...

[Ultralight]

I have always been convinced that many life partnerships are as much about finances as they are about love.

I am a difficult man to love. Most women I have dated have called me "exhausting" -- including my most recent GF with whom I went to Splitsville about a month or so ago.

I have been told: "Being in a relationship with you is like joining a cult."

I kind of laugh and cry about this.

But... the issue is that I simply cannot afford to live alone. So I may have to modify my behavior/thinking in several ways, which is about as easy as me pushing a mountain across a continent.

[lessisbest]

I guess it's time to find additional work to supplement your income - what a unique concept. Hubby worked 4 part-time jobs while he was taking 22-credit hours getting a degree in architecture, and in the summer worked one fulltime and 2 part time jobs, and I worked 2 jobs (one fulltime and one part-time) and we also had one child to support. And that's also why we didn't have a huge amount of student load debt - we worked.

I would also find a new home for your dog, since it is an unnecessary expense. I know that seems harsh, but it's the same reason we don't own pets. If I want a pet I can go next door and take their two (much neglected) dogs for a walk, have them over for a romp in the yard, and like grandchildren, take them back after having all the fun and none of the expense.

I would also go over that budget again and see if there are any other money "leaks" that need filling. Any free time should be spent trying to figure out how you can increase your income, or make improvements to get a higher-paying job. Without knowing every aspect of your life, these are generalities off the top of my head.

[Ultralight]

I guess it's time to find additional work to supplement your income - what a unique concept. Hubby worked 4 part-time jobs while he was taking 22-credit hours getting a degree in architecture, and in the summer worked one fulltime and 2 part time jobs, and I worked 2 jobs (one fulltime and one part-time) and we also had one child to support. And that's also why we didn't have a huge amount of student load debt - we worked.

1. Why didn't you give your child up for adoption? Kids cost way more than dogs.

2. All that time working...? No thanks. I'd rather eat rice and beans and have some free time. If I live to be old I don't want to look back and be like: "I gave my whole life to a job I did not even like. I could have tightened my belt and perhaps spent time with friends, my dog, or doing things I love -- like fishing."

I would also find a new home for your dog, since it is an unnecessary expense. I know that seems harsh, but it's the same reason we don't own pets. If I want a pet I can go next door and take their two (much neglected) dogs for a walk, have them over for a romp in the yard, and like grandchildren, take them back after having all the fun and none of the expense.

1. I am keeping my dog.

2. Happy Friday to you too!

I would also go over that budget again and see if there are any other money "leaks" that need filling. Any free time should be spent trying to figure out how you can increase your income, or make improvements to get a higher-paying job. Without knowing every aspect of your life, these are generalities off the top of my head.

[JaneV2.0]

I used to drive through upscale neighborhoods and think something like "with an income-producing partner, I could have a much nicer house." But it really never seemed worth it. Now I want a smaller house and I've really never been about basing my relationships on economics, and I'm glad about that.

Maybe you'll get lucky some day and find a wannabe cultist who doesn't mind being there to supply sex and rent money. Sounds kind of grim.

I wouldn't even consider getting rid of your dog. If life is all about money, IMO, it's not worth living.

[Teacher Terry]

Whenever people say get rid of your dog my head feels like it is going to explode. I knew you wouldn't even consider it UL. I would live in my RV before I would give up my 4 dogs. I would give up every single material possession I have before my pets would go. Things are just things and they are living, loving beings. Pets are for life just like kids except they don't live as long) I have worked in dog rescue for years and it is that kind of thinking that does not make people take pet ownership seriously. How about renting a studio so it would be cheaper? If life was just about $ it would not be worth living.

[Ultralight]

Whenever people say get rid of your dog my head feels like it is going to explode. I knew you wouldn't even consider it UL. I would live in my RV before I would give up my 4 dogs. I would give up every single material possession I have before my pets would go. Things are just things and they are living, loving beings. Pets are for life just like kids except they don't live as long) I have worked in dog rescue for years and it is that kind of thinking that does not make people take pet ownership seriously. How about renting a studio so it would be cheaper? If life was just about $ it would not be worth living.

My guess is that lessisbest was just being mean-spirited. Something could be going wrong in their life right now and they just want to lash out. Harlan and I just happened to be in the path of that lashing.

But I am with you, I'd toss every physical thing I own before I'd give up my dog. I'd only give up my dog if I could not take care of him well.

The studio is not that much cheaper...

[Teacher Terry]

The number 1 reason people give up their dogs is because they are moving or don't want to pay for a surgery they need. Not can't pay but don't want too. Our HS have had 14 yo dogs that just need a simple surgery. Thankfully we are no kill and will fix the dog and adopt it out. I have taken in old, sick dogs that their owner didn't want and 2x's drove across the country to get the dogs. Many people believe that pets are disposal. Although, we have had to recognize our limits and cannot no longer do this so. If we die it wouldn't be fair to saddle our kids with all these pets. I am surprised that rents are so high in your part of the country. Ugh!

[Ultralight]

The number 1 reason people give up their dogs is because they are moving or don't want to pay for a surgery they need. Not can't pay but don't want too. Our HS have had 14 yo dogs that just need a simple surgery. Thankfully we are no kill and will fix the dog and adopt it out. I have taken in old, sick dogs that their owner didn't want and 2x's drove across the country to get the dogs. Many people believe that pets are disposal. Although, we have had to recognize our limits and cannot no longer do this so. If we die it wouldn't be fair to saddle our kids with all these pets. I am surprised that rents are so high in your part of the country. Ugh!

Rents are low in the rough areas of the city, which are also like 40 minute commutes to my work. I work in a ritzy suburb.

So I am just mitigating the circumstances the best I can -- getting the cheapest, best place that is closest to work. I won't have to drive to work, I can walk or cycle. That is a big perk.

But about dogs... I read somewhere that at least 33% of dogs die in a shelter or in the street. I don't know how true it is, but if it is even half that then we're still talking tragedy.

When my parents die I have no idea what will become of their two dogs or their unknown numbers of cats. And at any point they could get more dogs and -- more likely -- more cats.

[Teacher Terry]

We intend to get down to 1 or 2 dogs and then my kids can deal with that. Millions of dogs/cats are pts every year. Our local HS travels around the country teaching others how to be a no kill shelter that never fills up so to speak. There are techniques they use to keep the pets moving out, partnering with other groups, lots of volunteers and foster homes, etc. I have a good friend that does dog rescue and her hubby could not take care of all of them if she dies but she has homes for each of them with her friends. I think it is only responsible to plan for the future.

[ApatheticNoMore]

Roommates? Ok roommates suck, hey I don't have roommates, because I don't like them. But I'd like to think I'd (and truthfully I probably would) choose roomates over choosing a romantic relationship for financial reasons (as if I have any ability to choose a relationship for financial reasons anyway, I pretty much always in better financial shape than just about everyone I date - and it's not like I'm rich).

A situation that might work is finding someone to rent a room off of in a house in as well.

The studio is not that much cheaper...

i hear you on this, they seldom are, that's some myth non-renters think because they don't know. But even a little cheaper is a little cheaper I guess. Could even buying be cheaper where you are? it certainly isn't here, but in some parts of the country I sometimes hear it is, and maybe you could rent out a room or something. Buying really only works if you plan to stay put though, if you switch jobs a lot it doesn't work well.