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Thread: I'm bummed..........and overwhelmed, and mad, and sad.........

  1. #1
    Senior Member CathyA's Avatar
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    I'm bummed..........and overwhelmed, and mad, and sad.........

    I'm having a bad day/week/month. There's becoming a bigger and bigger split between how I feel life should go and how this country (and world?) are going.

    I live out in the country, but live close enough to a couple of people who ruin my precious solitude.........or farmers who use too many chemicals......or people shooting off their guns, or riding their motocross cycles........I could go on and on.
    But.....there are times when I have to go to the city to do some things. Nobody follows the speed limit. There's trash everywhere. People are always using their cell phones....whether while driving or crossing the street in front of cars.

    In stores, there is so much crap, I just am blown over. And all the produce they throw out constantly.....that are in plastic containers that I'm sure is also thrown out. Very few people I see use cloth shopping bags.

    I went to Target to buy a few items and they are totally remodeling/enlarging the store to hold more crap. I have a bad knee, so I use the electric cart. It ran out of steam and I had to find another one. I had to move my stuff to the other one, while 2 employees were gabbing right next to me, seeing me, but not helping. People stand in the middle of isles with their carts, totally oblivious to anyone else needing to get by.

    I go to buy something and the price isn't marked. I drive the cart across the store to a "price check" machine, and it doesn't work. Then my DH calls me and says that someone sent in their tax returns with his social security number. He's overwhelmed at work, plus we're trying to renew our Home Equity loan (which we've had for many years, and don't use often, but have always paid it off in short time), but because of all the new laws, they call him every day with more stuff he needs to send in to them. So now he has to figure out how to handle his SS number being compromised.

    I could go on and on and on.

    Oh.........and on my way to and from town, there are many beautiful rural places that are now bull-dozed and beginning to be filled with big houses. I can see a little log cabin home that used to be in the woods, and now it's next to this big monster subdivision.

    Is there no end to this "growth and development"? Is no one EVER happy with what they've got? We seem like spoiled brats who buy something, get tired of it, throw it away, buy a new one. It just seems like we're headed in a downward spiral. The world seems NUTS to me.

    Yes, I can only control my immediate surroundings, but damn.......this is my country and my planet too......and it makes me sick to see what's happening to it.
    We were barely keeping the air and waters somewhat clean........and now we're removing those laws? How insane are we? I'm very sad.

  2. #2
    Senior Member KayLR's Avatar
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    I understand what you're saying, Cathy. I feel that way too, too much of the time.

    All I have to do is take a drive out to my once-bucolic childhood hometown. When I lived there through my teens, the population was between 650-800. I lived there several more chunks of time through my adulthood and my mom and daughter still live there. Starting about 5 years ago it began a growth spurt. It is now nearing 10 times that due to annexation, development and people moving out of the big cities to "live in the country."

    The families I grew up with owned many large farms, ag and dairy, and now that the baby boomers who still own them are getting up there in years are unloading them (because who wants to farm--not their kids), the developers are snapping them up and cramming as many mini-mansions on the acreage as fast as they can. The sick part is, they think they're moving to the quiet countryside, but it won't be that way for long. Following this will be more supermarkets, fast food joints and entertainment, etc., where the berry, bean and potato fields, orchards, and dairies used to be.

    Also, most of this land is in a flyway for waterfowl. There are 2 national refuges nearby. Think these developments will affect the bird population some? I do.

    When I drive out there, it nearly makes me sick to my stomach and drives me to tears. When I reflect on all the childhood memories I have there, it saddens me so much to see it obliterated. But I guess that's what many call progress.

    All we can do is keep trying to do what our inner voice tells us. Keep using your reusable bags, refuse to buy crap. Be an example to your children and grandchildren. As much as they do annoy me, I do see some hope among the Millennials. Maybe some day they'll right the ship.
    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already!

  3. #3
    Senior Member CathyA's Avatar
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    I, too, am almost to tears when I drive through some areas. It's unbelievable how much can go up in such a short time. I used to visit "The Herb Barn" out in the country not too far away. Just an old barn where the owner grew a lot of herbs and flowers. It's gone and there are huge areas of houses everywhere.
    My Honda service place moved to an area about 2 years ago that used to be a small town, and now I believe it's considered a city. It's so painful to get my car serviced there, but I do like them, so I continue to go there. It used to be countryside with a little white church on a corner. Now it's a subdivision and businesses. I wish I could have a bag over my head when I drive through there to have my car serviced......but that wouldn't go so well.
    I get pretty melancholy when I think of beautiful, simple places that are no more.

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    It could go back, but maybe not in your lifetime. More of New England (80%) is forested today than in the mid-1800's (30 to 40%). Populations can also crash due to epidemics as happened during The Black Plague, and could recur today if something like Ebola got out of hand.

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    Senior Member CathyA's Avatar
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    There's an interesting book titled "The World Without Us" by Alan Weisman where he guesses what would happen if we were all gone. Yes, nature would go on. I've never doubted that it would. It just hurts to see it so mistreated and unappreciated.

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    Senior Member Simplemind's Avatar
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    I'm right there with you. I had a wonderful childhood out in the boonies. We had 11 acres and were surrounded by other farms. We had all the farm animals and experiences with showing them through 4H. We played all day and came home when it was dark.
    My mom passed five years ago and my dad just wasn't maintaining, nor did he need all the property and responsibility. He always thought one of us would want everything but we are all in our 50's and have our own places. It killed me to sell that property. I thought long and hard about it but DH had a stroke in 2012 and we were not up to the farm life that we had once pondered. One house on the property has been torn down and a McMansion put up. Five acres were forested and I heard trees were coming down. I have not been back since the day I signed the papers. I get tears just writing this...... DH drives by on occasion to look but I asked that he not tell me what he sees. I want to remember it as it was. I wish I could have saved it.

  7. #7
    Senior Member CathyA's Avatar
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    I'm sorry about that Simplemind. It must be very painful.

    I was thinking about farmland today, and how many children of the farmers don't really want to be farmers. It's hard to not accept a developer's million dollar offer for that farmland, and I can't fault the old farmers for doing that. But it can sure change the whole area, to have houses/subdivisions go up all over that farmland.

    It drives me crazy, seeing so much destroyed, without any thought for anything accept the developer wanting to make money and people wanting their dream home, no matter what it destroys. What I find strange is how people move into huge subdivisions in the country, with hardly any yard, and then say they wanted to live out in the country. Seems like people like me in the country who aren't farmers don't have much say in what happens. They all seem like robots to me. I don't understand how people can't wonder where all this "development" is going to take us. I must be from another planet. Yes, nature will endure. But it does hurt to see it so mistreated. Such utter beauty and perfect balance........replaced with loud noise and crap.

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    Senior Member Simplemind's Avatar
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    I was so concerned about our neighbors who pretty much started their families in the valley when we did in the early 60's. I know you don't have too much say on what happens when you sell but we really did try to find the right people. One couple wanted the main house and a couple of acres for their mission of helping the homeless. They wanted their ministry to include putting "affordable" trailers on the back acres in the woods by the creek for the homeless. Over my dead body!! We sold the main house to a young family with two small boys who will love growing up in the woods and playing in the creek like we did. A contractor bought the pasture land, tore down the old (turn of the century/money sink hole) farm house and built a McMansion but was leaving the old barns and brought in horses for his two boys so that was nice. Hope all four boys make friends and ride like we did back in the day. Zoning did not permit for lots to be broken up so thankfully no additional homes can go in. Still............. change is so hard for me. I can't stand the thought of anybody living on it but us. I miss the kind neighbors we had. Everybody helped everybody. I wish my own kid had been able to grow up that way.

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    I think about this too. But perhaps it is because we are older and have lived long enough to see so many changes and compare and contrast what we have known and what is gone. I am still dealing with crazy homesickness for the city we left last fall but even as we did, it was changing at lightning speed. I doubt I would recognize it if and when we ever go back what with all the development. Ditto here in Colorado where we are now. Nothing is the same as I recall. Litter, homeless people, speeding drivers...I've decided though that I will pick up the trash in the beautiful little park near my house. I might even scold the parents who feed the ducks with their kids while they stand next to the sign that says "Don't feed the ducks"! Grrr...

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    Quote Originally Posted by CathyA View Post
    I'm having a bad day/week/month. There's becoming a bigger and bigger split between how I feel life should go and how this country (and world?) are going.

    I live out in the country, but live close enough to a couple of people who ruin my precious solitude.........or farmers who use too many chemicals......or people shooting off their guns, or riding their motocross cycles........I could go on and on.


    Yes, I can only control my immediate surroundings, but damn.......this is my country and my planet too......and it makes me sick to see what's happening to it.
    We were barely keeping the air and waters somewhat clean........and now we're removing those laws? How insane are we? I'm very sad.
    Have you signed up to go to Mars? Your not the only one on this planet, your values and beliefs are just that, yours. Change and life happens. The planet has a increased population from the time I was born. As a kid, I was told the baby boomers had the most number of people, which would mean that there would be less people to pay for social security and house prices should fall, not rise, as there were more vacant houses.
    Drunk driving went from a common occurrence to something severe, and people started getting busted, rather then being able to hide in a neighbors garage after running (local woman allowed her garage to be used, 20 years before I was born).
    People used to make firearms parts in schools, and rifles were in the backs of vehicles a lot of the year, and all through hunting season, while parked at school. Now that is a lock-down and arrest situation.
    Paint went from this thicker substance that held real well, to thinner stuff that didn't and now has improved as chemistry improved, while getting the lead out.
    Vehicle fuel went from ethanol, to unleaded gas, to charging more to add lead and leaded gas, to then charging more to skip the adding lead step, and now incorporating ethanol.
    Went from hand tools to power tools, mostly after WWII. Homes took less time to build, materials changed (plaster to sheetrock, insulation as fuel prices rise).
    On and on and on and on. Life and change happens. Some things improve, others may not, then others, we are just viewing through our value systems, the same way, they probably did going from blacksmiths, to mechanics, or at the start of rock and roll.
    Your thread reminds me of a late neighbors, late daughter, and her comment, "what we need is a good depression".

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