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Thread: The bottom fell out (part II).

  1. #11
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    Yeah, I wasn't sure about that comment, either. I don't get that from the OPs post. If you mean that online dating is "artificially putting yourself out there," it's very common practice these days. From what I can gather, t's not as easy to bump into your life partner as it used to be--plus the internet is just a tool.

    Case in point, my DS broke up with a girlfriend a year or so ago, and he spent months and months trying to meet someone to no avail, even though he lives in a vibrant city and meets people all the time. We kept telling him to sign up for an online dating service and he refused over and over--he's very much a romantic and wanted to meet his next girlfriend in a way that would be written for a Jennifer Lawrence/Bradley Cooper movie.

    Life doesn't happen that way. He FINALLY gave in and signed up for the online service, had two or three dates that weren't the right fit, but he just celebrated 3 months of dating a woman he is madly in love with, and the feeling's mutual. They fit together like a hand in glove.

    There's nothing wrong with finding a partner online. You are not being "artificial"--my son is the most authentic person I know, and it's working for him.



    And I don't think OP said that he was planning on doing all those other things like hot air ballooning just to meet someone--I get the impression he wanted to do them anyway, was just hoping for someone to do them with.

    OP, I agree with the others who say just do exactly what you said--go out there and live your life, and life may surprise you.
    Very glad to hear it worked out for your son!
    的 came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  2. #12
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    My impression from the original post was that Ultralite has been meeting these women on "dates" that involve things like going out to dinner - which he does not enjoy. My assumption being that if these "dates" we're opportunities to do things he enjoys anyway but with a variety of women, he would not be sick of the whole thing or resent the outlay of his "money, time, energy."

    but perhaps I misunderstood and they have been meeting at the dog park to play with Harlan and he is just tired of the endless turnover.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chicken lady View Post
    My impression from the original post was that Ultralite has been meeting these women on "dates" that involve things like going out to dinner - which he does not enjoy. My assumption being that if these "dates" we're opportunities to do things he enjoys anyway but with a variety of women, he would not be sick of the whole thing or resent the outlay of his "money, time, energy."

    but perhaps I misunderstood and they have been meeting at the dog park to play with Harlan and he is just tired of the endless turnover.
    I am indeed tired of the endless turnover. haha
    的 came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  4. #14
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Our singles group, back in the day, was really a good group. We had planned activities where an average of 10 people attended. Sometimes we had as many as 20 people. We went camping, we ate at restaurants, we went to bars for dancing and drinking. The drinking wasnt a priority. A singles group is a good way to meet people, casually, and not the intensive one-on-one encounter that is a traditional date.

    Are there still singles groups? I would think there is a place for them even in the world of a online dating. We had the manual version of online dating back in the day, DH called it "newspaper dating" where singles replied to ads in newspapers. I had several short term relationships that were fun through that service and DH has a few dates that way.

    And Harlan! Your pal to get women. Last night as I walked through our neighborhood I saw three young women walking their dogs and I thought of you, UL. Dog activities, an excellent way t meet people.

  5. #15
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    Are there still singles groups?
    I noticed there are quite a few singles groups in the local meetup listings. My niece, also in late 30s, has been online dating for quite a while now. She finally met someone with whom she has clicked (at least I hope).

  6. #16
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    How can school not be a good way to meet women when they heavily outnumber men on college campuses?

  7. #17
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post

    CL is giving good advice. Be true to yourself and lead an authentic life. Maybe someone will come along, perhaps not, but your life will be better for it.
    The dreaded "just be yourself" advice! LOL

    Being myself (which I actually like being) is part of what isolates me.
    的 came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    How can school not be a good way to meet women when they heavily outnumber men on college campuses?
    Well, I am 37, so most women are like 21 years old on campus. But the women in my age bracket:
    1. Have kids
    2. Have the baby-rabies
    3. Have mental health problems (very common in the social work program I am in; I know because the self-disclose all their mental health problems, and lifestyle problems for that matter).
    的 came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  9. #19
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    Professional development seminars, conferences, or networking groups then? Social work has a lot of women.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    Social work has a lot of women.
    Very true!
    But they come in two camps:
    1. Provincial traditionalists who are engaged, married, and have the baby-rabies.
    2. SJWs.
    的 came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

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