I don't think UL is screening by age but by lying. However screening by age is how the SOFTWARE WORKS period, it's a major criteria one puts in for searching and there aren't that many criteria usually (one can't demand only brunettes so easily as they can only 30-40 year olds), and when people are subject to the design of software ...Maybe instead of screening by age you need to take a closer look at those SJWs you dismissed.
Trees don't grow on money
There are shockingly few of those. And most of them outgrow it after college.Originally Posted by Yppej
If she was straight-up with me and said she was 47 then I would be like: "Game on!"
I have no problem dating a woman 10 years older than me. I would be happy to do so!
This was her response:
"I enjoyed talking with you too.
Well, I guess you found out before I tell you. The reason I lied about my age is I wanted people to see me and talk in person before they shut the chances to meet because of my age (to increase my chances to meet the right person, I guess?). My plan is after I meet somebody for the first time and if we decide to go further I will let him know then. And if he thinks I am too old for him I wouldn’t have a problem at all. Believe me it was hard for me, but I feel it might be not bad as long as I tell him before we meet for the second time.
I am sorry that you might feel I deceived you, and I understand it might ruin the whole thing. Well, guess at least we met.
Thanks for complementing my mind and it meant a lot to me and you seemed to me to have a great mind… if we don’t see each other again I wish you good luck."
I'd give her another chance ...
Maybe it ended up or the best.
I don't know if that gives me hope for if I ever decide to get out in the dating world again or not - most men I've seen when I WAS looking to date were interested in 10+ years younger. I'm actually old enough to be your mom, UL - if you had a teenage mom.
I vote for a 2nd chance IF you would have gone out with her again without the lie. Just as I thought--she just wanted a foot in the door because most 30-something guys would be scared off by her age. She checks a lot of boxes for you, she's even better because she's older. I'm not convinced this little fib was enough to trash her character--yet.
"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
www.silententry.wordpress.com
I think the fact that you have deemed her "dishonest" means that any relationship is doomed from the start. She is already apologizing to you--this is not a healthy start to a relationship between equals; let her go, as this is a very negative dynamic for both of you.
Remember the part where you said everybody in your dating pool is defective? You are extremely demanding. And I don't think it's necessarily that you hold others to a higher standard than you hold yourself, you just seem to find faults unacceptable. You should probably get one of the t- shirts that says "the more people I meet, the more I like my dog." Harlan isn't perfect, but that's ok with you, because Harlan is a dog. But people are also imperfect.
but seriously, I think you probably need to do some work on yourself before you go back to dating. And I don't mean push ups. You are either looking for a reason to sabotage every relationship, or you are so inflexible that you might as well give up.
what flaws would you find acceptable? And I don't mean "I can overlook this" I mean "this is ok." Because nobody deserves to be in a relationship with someone who is "forgiving" their shortcomings all the time.
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