Sharing the work between spouses.

[CathyA]

Wow Tybee.......you ARE lucky, and I'm happy for you!!

[catherine]

I have a husband much like IL's husband, I think. He can fix almost anything and has done things like jack up the barn and stabilize the foundation. He was just out forking the compost and now he's in playing a sonata on the piano. He makes the best coffee I have ever tasted in my life. He has worked some sh*tty jobs so we could have health insurance, including being an over the road truck driver, even though he has a masters degree in piano performance. He is an awesome listener and we have more fun together than I have ever had with another human being. We laugh a lot. He cooks breakfast.

I would say these are the reasons I love him but that's not true, I fell in love with him at first sight, which was very weird, but true.
Oh well. I'm just lucky, I guess.

What a nice tribute, Tybee!

[Gardnr]

Fair? I don't know what Fair is. We are equally satisfied with our division of duties.

I would suggest that you DO in fact work. Your job is to maintain home. If you're going to make it fair, your job should have equal hours to his job. If it takes more hours than that, then you split those remaining hours into task "units" to equalize the total workload of each of you.

You are a breadwinner defacto because you maintain home. If you didn't do that there would be an out-of-pocket cost to have it all done.

[BikingLady]

After so. so , many years of bliss The line of thought is If I can not do it, hire it done. He used to swing a mean hammer, now he swings the golf club.

[iris lilies]

I think of what I would do if DH died, and I probably wouldnt stay here a very long time. even though our house is not large, under 2,000 sq feet. Although from the 1880's it has been gutted and renovated, it still requires maintenance that I am just not interested in.

you can hire the big stuff done, but the little handyman stuff, that is hard to get someone to do.

[Chicken lady]

My dad used to say he was going to do the "handyman" stuff, but mostly he started projects or took things apart, and got to a sticking point or lost interest.

every year he took a solo vacation to Montana to fish with his best friend for a week. One year, my mom had had it. She called the construction company (small business) that built our house and said "John, could I hire your crew to come out for one day and fix all the stuff (dh) hasn't gotten to?" And the guy said "sure!" When dad got back from Montana, the French doors were up and the steps were safe, and the shelf was installed over the fireplace, and the torn linoleum was replaced... It took him two weeks, and then he noticed the French doors.

mom made a standing date with the construction crew.

[catherine]

My dad used to say he was going to do the "handyman" stuff, but mostly he started projects or took things apart, and got to a sticking point or lost interest.

every year he took a solo vacation to Montana to fish with his best friend for a week. One year, my mom had had it. She called the construction company (small business) that built our house and said "John, could I hire your crew to come out for one day and fix all the stuff (dh) hasn't gotten to?" And the guy said "sure!" When dad got back from Montana, the French doors were up and the steps were safe, and the shelf was installed over the fireplace, and the torn linoleum was replaced... It took him two weeks, and then he noticed the French doors.

mom made a standing date with the construction crew.

haha, great story, Chicken lady!

[CathyA]

Yeah, it would be great to have a "handy man" on retainer. hahaha

[Teacher Terry]

If I could not get my DH to do stuff around the house I would hire a handyman and that is what i would do if I were you Cathy. When my husband was working f.t. out of town there was a bunch of little things not done so I hired one to do them all.

[pinkytoe]

Hiring a handyman is easier than it sounds. We can't do it all with the house we just bought and trying to find anyone who wants to do smaller stuff is really hard. Or they say they are coming and never show up. In the end, we just do it ourselves just to get it done.