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Thread: Nothing wrong with looking! Not anymore...?

  1. #71
    Simpleton Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultralight View Post
    I have said far, far less offensive things on here and been threatened with removal.
    Yes, that was during your "troll the other members" phase. Once you were advised of consequences and remedies, the problem mostly went away.
    Surely you see the difference.
    "Things should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler." ~ Albert Einstein

  2. #72
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    Oh certanly, my financial criteria was all about "can they take care of themselves financially." But also blowing money made me nervous. I would have rather had a boyfriend making $15,000 and saving $2,000 than someme making $50,000 and savinf $2,000.
    We both 'waste" money in different ways, but I'm the profligate one in our relationship. I'm pretty good at not going overboard, though.

    Tybee--yes, kindness trumps status every time, for me.

  3. #73
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    I must have been naive, but I never even considered a man's income. I was attracted to men who had a passion for something (and still am). And many times it takes a lot of fortitude and ambition to make our passions happen which is also an attractive trait.

  4. #74
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan View Post
    Yes, that was during your "troll the other members" phase. Once you were advised of consequences and remedies, the problem mostly went away.
    Surely you see the difference.
    Not really. One censor's "trolling" is another man's thought-provoking question. )
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  5. #75
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    I never thought my beloved had a passion for anything, until I realized his passion is people.
    It never occurred to me that was a thing; the idea is foreign to me.

  6. #76
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pinkytoe View Post
    I must have been naive, but I never even considered a man's income. I was attracted to men who had a passion for something (and still am). And many times it takes a lot of fortitude and ambition to make our passions happen which is also an attractive trait.
    All of thatbis true, and well said.

    Its not that I focused on how much anyne made, but I will admit to prioitizing any potenial mate trait included being sensible about money. And as it turns out, I got someone who is extremely frugal, a good thing in the long run for me.

  7. #77
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    When you truly deeply love someone I don't see how you can not love everyone who is a part of them. I was the one who insisted, over my last boyfriend's concerns about the cost, in traveling to see his family, helped him out with child support payments when he was unemployed, and said if his adult daughter and her kids needed a place to stay we would just rent a UHaul and go pick her up. He himself was "dad" to 4 children of ex-girlfriends whose biological fathers were not in the picture even after his relationships with their mothers ended. With him it was always my son or daughter, no qualifiers, and I have also heard others talk about not using the term step, because that implies a lesser degree of kinship.

    I'm sure it is cheaper to not adopt a big tent approach to family, but it is so satisfying, the opposite of loneliness. At the present time I am working to maintain long distance relationships with my late ex-husband's siblings, aunts to my son.

    You can't take it with you. Just this morning I was reading Ecclesiastes 5 on that.

  8. #78
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    When you truly deeply love someone I don't see how you can not love everyone who is a part of them. I was the one who insisted, over my last boyfriend's concerns about the cost, in traveling to see his family, helped him out with child support payments when he was unemployed, and said if his adult daughter and her kids needed a place to stay we would just rent a UHaul and go pick her up. He himself was "dad" to 4 children of ex-girlfriends whose biological fathers were not in the picture even after his relationships with their mothers ended. With him it was always my son or daughter, no qualifiers, and I have also heard others talk about not using the term step, because that implies a lesser degree of kinship.

    I'm sure it is cheaper to not adopt a big tent approach to family, but it is so satisfying, the opposite of loneliness. At the present time I am working to maintain long distance relationships with my late ex-husband's siblings, aunts to my son.

    You can't take it with you. Just this morning I was reading Ecclesiastes 5 on that.
    Kudos to you for rescuing so many people.
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  9. #79
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    Plenty of people have helped me out or "rescued" me when I needed help. If you cast your bread upon waters, after many days it will come to you. What comes around goes around. Have a penny give a penny, need a penny take a penny. It's not just me, it's imbued in the best of our culture, as opposed to say geisha culture where a man is only interested in a woman for sex and clever conversation, and certainly won't get involved in the lives of children she had with other men.

  10. #80
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    Plenty of people have helped me out or "rescued" me when I needed help. If you cast your bread upon waters, after many days it will come to you. What comes around goes around. Have a penny give a penny, need a penny take a penny. It's not just me, it's imbued in the best of our culture, as opposed to say geisha culture where a man is only interested in a woman for sex and clever conversation, and certainly won't get involved in the lives of children she had with other men.
    I have cast bread upon water and fish came up and ate it.
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

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