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Thread: Fierce at 50, When You Are 20 Or 30

  1. #11
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    Good point, ANM. High heels aren't just uncomfortable, they are actually bad for you.

  2. #12
    Senior Member Tradd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bae View Post
    I made it through the state Fire Academy at the age of 50. I'm just getting started...
    I agree with Bae. Got certified to dive at age 47. I'm diving nearly every weekend. Have plans to gradually get more training to do deeper wrecks (as in the 150ft range).

    I'm just getting started.

  3. #13
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    I went back and reread the article because I thought maybe I had missed something--the category was something about style and privilege, which put me off from the start. It all seems to be aimed at how women look, and how younger women should behave a certain way because they are going to age, but then there is the category about traveling more, which makes no sense at all, in the context of life advice about wearing high heels and sunscreen.
    Ew, if that is how you spell that reaction.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    Each season in life has it's own unique gifts and challenges. I think the author was talking about enjoying the gifts of youth to their fullest because youth is fleeting. But if you don't like her list, just write your own!

    Even though I'm trying to take good care of my body and am enjoying this season in my life a great deal, I'm still aware of the challenge of a physically aging body. I'm happier today than I was at 25, but my body has deteriorated and will continue to deteriorate with every passing year. That's not me being depressed, or depressing, it's just me being aware.

    I'm enjoying different things than I did in my 20's and 30's, even early 40's. I'm glad I traveled a lot when I was younger. And danced. I danced a lot. And had a mini love affair with fashion. It was a lot of fun! All of it. Now I get to try out new things. I'm looking forward to discovering new pleasures in my 50's, 60's and 70's.

    And in my 70's, I hope to look back on this season of my life and feel happy and glad that I enjoyed its gifts to the fullest.

  5. #15
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    I went back and reread the article because I thought maybe I had missed something--the category was something about style and privilege, which put me off from the start. It all seems to be aimed at how women look, and how younger women should behave a certain way because they are going to age, but then there is the category about traveling more, which makes no sense at all, in the context of life advice about wearing high heels and sunscreen.
    Ew, if that is how you spell that reaction.
    +1 yea what I was saying kinda. Was of course thinking of privilege and how even travel is often a sign of privilege (have the money to spend one's vacations that way as someone mentioned, or if one does it cheaply it is possible it indicates even more privilege to be able to take off that way, I don't know ... not a sociologist but I suspect so). But most of the article wasn't really about that but about looks.


    Quote Originally Posted by Geila View Post
    Each season in life has it's own unique gifts and challenges. I think the author was talking about enjoying the gifts of youth to their fullest because youth is fleeting.
    but I think women are already made 100% neurotic about age in the culture as is, and not JUST when they turn 50 either. Turning 30 is hard for women (just read people turning that age online if you don't remember, I had to constantly remind myself after 30 that I was old and so should have a more frankly depressive attitude about life), 35, 40, 45 etc.. I figure there is not hardly a woman alive in this culture not aware that youth is fleeing and not just where it's entirely relevant either like to procreation. And this is likely a great negative to women, because it causes them to see life not just in terms of a full lifespan or even a full lifespan until disability and dementia kicks in at 85 or 90 or something (if it does), but in terms of only "when I am young and beautiful". Ask a woman at 35 where she sees herself in 5 years, in other words to have goals, to plan ahead etc. all those supposedly healthy things, and she might not be able to get past the fact "ugh I'll be 40!!!!" I have been asked that question and went into exactly that black out, can't even see beyond that to plan and hope.

    And had a mini love affair with fashion.
    odd advice for all women at 20 and 30 though considering some women were never into fashion to begin with and don't even see the appeal.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    I repeat, if you don't like someone else's list: WRITE YOUR OWN!!! And then post it here for everyone to enjoy.

    I've moved on from enjoying memories of seasons past and am now pondering THIS season's gifts. I want to make sure I enjoy them to the fullest.

    On privilege - I try to be aware of my privilege so that I can be grateful for it. And it doesn't have to be big privilege (wealth or whatever), it can be the privilege of having access to hot running water in the comfort of my own home. Having the privilege of a body that allows me to walk and dance (I still dance!) and take care of my needs and the needs of my family. The privilege to choose how to spend my days. So. Much. Privilege. And I'm grateful for it every day. And I feel pain and compassion for the millions of people around the world who lack even the most basic of needs and privileges. Like food and safety. And love. Respect.

    I don't mean to end this post on a sad note, but I do think it's important to have perspective.

  7. #17
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    I thought you wanted to talk about the article, Geila. It was her list, right? I think those of us who thought it was an odd article were commenting on it as an article, or at least I was. I was not trying to post my own life list, which would of course look different.

    I am glad you have so much and are grateful, that is a wonderful way to be.

  8. #18
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    oh I argue when I have strong thoughts and impressions on things, I mean no harm by it, it's all in the spirit of debate though I do have a position. How one lives their life if it truly does not harm others is *shrug* (so if collecting clothes is one's thing so be it - at most it's wasteful but so is most of modern western life unfortunately so it's hardly anything special there). However ... social pressures that push people in what I think are harmful ways is something to be elaborated, especially as they can be changed by awareness sometimes without even legislation which so many other problems require.

    My list would be something like enjoy your looks and dress cute if you want, but fundamentally value yourself on other attributes than youth and appearance, and yes they won't last and so therefore, learn, hope that you might through gathering knowledge and experience be blessed with wisdom someday when you are older, build friendships etc..

    There is perspective of privilege, which would be fine if the argument I was making was actually a whine about privilege (I know it might seem like that but it wasn't) and some people having more money to travel than others when even those who don't should be grateful they have running water and enough to eat and should be glad. That is well and fine. But I was more addressing that if people feel bad after reading an article like that because they didn't travel in their youth or something, that it isn't in everyone's *possibilities* to do so anyway, maybe they were working too hard just to make it, that the things they are told they *should* do often come from a perspective of the kind of privilege maybe the top 20-30% of even the U.S. has (just like sitcoms show people living a lifestyle that no one working the jobs they supposedly have can live), in a culture that really doesn't reward travel for most people etc. (it's more tolerated in OZ if you go on walkabout heh, in the U.S. employers might wonder what the @#$# you did then). But nothing is stopping someone earning good money in their 20s from traveling in their 2-3 weeks off a year if they want to, or not if they don't.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

  9. #19
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    My list would be very pragmatic, about things like get professional licensure in something, start your own business, try to avoid having a child until you can support yourself and your child in a lifestyle you would like, believe in yourself, avoid getting married if you can. Enjoy yourself! Oh, and save 20% of every penny you earn.

    That is the kind of advice 20-30 year old me needed. I was great at the makeup, sunscreen, clothing, diet, etc. Just couldn't get the hang of the important stuff, the stuff that I wish I knew now at 61!

  10. #20
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    Well, the article resonated with me and that's why I shared it. It was nice to remember all the fun of the earlier decades because all too often, we remember our mistakes and the challenges more than the fun stuff. But I can see that it did not resonate for most people here.

    I do think it would be interesting to see what people here would write to their younger selves from the vantage point of age and life experience. In that sense, I see this article as a chance to expand our mind, rather than contract it. I look for the positive wherever I can.

    And thank you for your kind words.

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