How to decide where to live

[iris lilies]

Don't underestimate the invigorating effect of moving to a new place and dealing with a new set of problems, and having a new set of discoveries. I have enjoyed that part of our peregrinations very much.

Maybe you could get a landscaping gig at the winery.

oh dude, two years ago
I sat there drinking wine and saw their pallid, boring granny iris and thought " these people need some real iris" so yeah, a little volunteer landscaping is on my agenda.

[catherine]

oh dude, two years ago
I sat there drinking wine and saw their pallid, boring granny iris and thought " these people need some real iris" so yeah, a little volunteer landscaping is on my agenda.

Sounds like a win-win to me!! Maybe they'll pay you in wine! That's an offer I'd take!

[Tybee]

IL, I looked up info on the Hermann Wine Trail and boy is that beautiful. It reminds me a lot of the Texas Hill Country. Good choice!

[pinkytoe]

the trifecta of inertia, comfort and nostalgia

We are in the middle of having left those three things behind so just a reminder that the "getting there" can be a lot harder than you ever imagined. Dreaming about it is one thing...I guess if you have the luxury of keeping your other house, that's a different thing. We bought an older house (can't afford two houses) and are going on four months of discombobulation, discomfort and wondering about the future plus spending a LOT of money to make it feel like home and in some cases, just bring it up to code. But...no regrets. The thought of never trying this big move and remaining comfortable was not something I wanted to do. In my darker moments though, I dream of just renting

[catherine]

We are in the middle of having left those three things behind so just a reminder that the "getting there" can be a lot harder than you ever imagined. Dreaming about it is one thing...I guess if you have the luxury of keeping your other house, that's a different thing. We bought an older house (can't afford two houses) and are going on four months of discombobulation, discomfort and wondering about the future plus spending a LOT of money to make it feel like home and in some cases, just bring it up to code. But...no regrets. The thought of never trying this big move and remaining comfortable was not something I wanted to do. In my darker moments though, I dream of just renting

So glad you have no regrets, because I know that you've shared some of the struggles here. I totally get it. I can't afford two homes either, but I'm also very reluctant to just put the "for sale" sign on the front lawn tomorrow, even if this weekend's visit to VT convinces us that we've found the right place to buy. I saw a house within our budget online in the town we want to live in, and it's a good price for a 4-season house but still in a lake town (not on the lake, and there was no mention of deeded lake access). I tell DH not to be sucked in by the decorating because that's superficial and it artificially inflates the value of the property--but this little house was just my style. In fact our cabinets were the same color, the appliances were the same, and they also had the same built-in banquettes that we have. It has a nice flat yard with lots of space for raised beds. It feels like a mini-me of my house in NJ. And it's 4 season. We could sell our house and put a good amount in retirement and own this house outright. We'll see what happens this weekend.

[JaneV2.0]

Catherine, I hope this turns out for you; it sounds perfect.
It is so rare that a house is a good match for me that it's almost painful not to be able to just go for it.

[iris lilies]

I am STRONGLY ambivilent about buying this Hermann house. One day I am all in for it, the next day I am relieved that we didnt take it on.

One thing that has come out of discussions is that DH articulated he doesnt find going south in the winter appealing. I think he is right, that would not really work for us unless it was a winter vacation for no more than 3 weeks. We are strongly homebodies, we need a home base that is deep and wide. We take our stimulation from settling in deep roots and noirishing them. That is why a picturesque community, with strong institutions and liveliness, is important because that stimulates our imaginations and incolvement beyond t just our own property.

Our "big garden," while only 3/4 of a mile away from where I live, is really a different world. The brothers shooting each other over there is taking a toll on my fondness for the place. I am sick of that atmosphere. It is bothering DH too, probably more than it bothers me. We would sell that place and give up the land I rent from the city in order to have a "big garden" in Hermann.

edited to add:
We are going to Europe for two weeks, so if this house in Hermann sells while we are gone, that is fine, the decision is made for me.

[JaneV2.0]

Not having to dodge bullets would be a strong motivator for me...

[catherine]

I agree with you about going south in the winter. Doesn't appeal to me, either.

So, how are you going to make your decision? How do you do it with no regrets?

[Tybee]

1. The Road Not Taken TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5 Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, 10 And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. 15 I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.