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Thread: What is positive house guest protocol

  1. #71
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    It is a big change that is evolving and will take time and reinforcing to find the ultimate solution so hang in there.
    You're right, it is a big change and I'm sure it will be difficult to make permanent changes.

    Over the weekend, dh's friend Jerry came in to town for a work thing. Dh told him he would not be able to stay here and he booked a room through Airbnb for $70. Dh met him for dinner and they spent a few hours visiting (and probably psychoanalyzing me). The next day, Jerry had his work thing for a couple of hours and then drove home. In the past, Jerry would have stayed with us, he would have brought his girlfriend along, they would have extended the trip into 3-4 days, and we would have fed them the whole time. I would have been washing sheets, buying food, cleaning up after meals, making sure to stay home because of the dogs, etc.... The extra work and toll of being "on" and a good hostess for that length of time would have left me exhausted and resentful. As it was, Jerry's visit had zero impact on my life! Yay!

    I'm not sure how DH feels about the whole thing - he says he's fine with it but now I take his words with a grain of salt. But, this is definitely a step in the right direction.

  2. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by Geila View Post
    You're right, it is a big change and I'm sure it will be difficult to make permanent changes.

    Over the weekend, dh's friend Jerry came in to town for a work thing. Dh told him he would not be able to stay here and he booked a room through Airbnb for $70. Dh met him for dinner and they spent a few hours visiting (and probably psychoanalyzing me). The next day, Jerry had his work thing for a couple of hours and then drove home. In the past, Jerry would have stayed with us, he would have brought his girlfriend along, they would have extended the trip into 3-4 days, and we would have fed them the whole time. I would have been washing sheets, buying food, cleaning up after meals, making sure to stay home because of the dogs, etc.... The extra work and toll of being "on" and a good hostess for that length of time would have left me exhausted and resentful. As it was, Jerry's visit had zero impact on my life! Yay!

    I'm not sure how DH feels about the whole thing - he says he's fine with it but now I take his words with a grain of salt. But, this is definitely a step in the right direction.
    Door mat days are over!!! Yay!

  3. #73
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    Geila,
    I forgot, but maybe you mentioned this - do you live in a popular tourist type area? Just wondering if that's another reason for the constant stream of visitors.
    I imagine anyone in those areas is constantly getting called with requests to visit.

  4. #74
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lainey View Post
    Geila,
    I forgot, but maybe you mentioned this - do you live in a popular tourist type area?.
    Yes, we do. And it's becoming even more popular.

    Years ago dh had a job offer in San Diego and we were seriously considering it and every time we told someone, we got the same response, "Great! I love San Diego and now I'll have somewhere to stay for free!"

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