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Thread: What is your Purpose?

  1. #31
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    If my house is a tomb (and it probably will be the death of me ), I want it to be like an Egyptian's--with all my favorite things around me. I probably won't kill off any servants or cats to accompany me, however.

    Catherine, why does your Vermont getaway have to be 700 square feet again? It seems like you could choose a place sized to accommodate both you and your chosen treasures.

  2. #32
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    It is really a case of living in the 'now' rather than the past, isn't it? Whenever the objects of the past take over our consciousness, time and energy of today's 'now', we are actually robbing ourselves. Why?
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  3. #33
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneV2.0 View Post

    Catherine, why does your Vermont getaway have to be 700 square feet again? It seems like you could choose a place sized to accommodate both you and your chosen treasures.
    I guess I'm using 700 sq ft loosely, but I'm basing it on that really cute house we saw last weekend that was a 9 out of 10. It would have been a 10 if it were 300 sq ft larger. To get you guys up to date, we actually made an offer, but the owners were in a desperate financial situation, had just found renters for the year, which would have given them the cash flow they need. They are going to live with her mother for a while. They have agreed to reach out to us if they put the house on the market next spring.

    When I lived in Ocean Grove for a few months, that house was about 600-700 square feet and I loved it. The question is.. could DH and I co-exist in such a small space?

    But, boy that house was a cutie!
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  4. #34
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    I guess I'm using 700 sq ft loosely, but I'm basing it on that really cute house we saw last weekend that was a 9 out of 10. It would have been a 10 if it were 300 sq ft larger. To get you guys up to date, we actually made an offer, but the owners were in a desperate financial situation, had just found renters for the year, which would have given them the cash flow they need. They are going to live with her mother for a while. They have agreed to reach out to us if they put the house on the market next spring.

    When I lived in Ocean Grove for a few months, that house was about 600-700 square feet and I loved it. The question is.. could DH and I co-exist in such a small space?

    But, boy that house was a cutie!
    Well, dang! Maybe an even better one will come along?

  5. #35
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    Geila, thanks for the kind words. I am learning so much by reading everyone's posts.

    Catherine, after my divorce I lived happily in 869 sq ft. Once I got together with my DH not so much. We now have 1400 sq ft with 1 car garage and very large shed. If I lived near you I would love to help you de-clutter. I have helped some of my friends in the past and doing it together was fun. When I was younger I saved everything. I have changed a lot in that regard. Amazon has a book called "How to downsize the family home." I ordered it but it has not come yet.

  6. #36
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
    Geila, thanks for the kind words. I am learning so much by reading everyone's posts.

    Catherine, after my divorce I lived happily in 869 sq ft. Once I got together with my DH not so much. We now have 1400 sq ft with 1 car garage and very large shed. If I lived near you I would love to help you de-clutter. I have helped some of my friends in the past and doing it together was fun. When I was younger I saved everything. I have changed a lot in that regard. Amazon has a book called "How to downsize the family home." I ordered it but it has not come yet.
    I was speaking to a good friend the other day. She's definitely more of a city lover, and she's moving back to Manhattan next year. She told me that one of the reasons she moved from a 950 sq ft apartment was because it wasn't enough space for her and her SO. So I really am reconsidering how low I really want to go with this. But DH really wants waterfront lake property, and it's hard to find for a low price unless you are willing to buy small.

    Adjacent to the house we really liked there is another house for sale--a real cabin. It's very tiny, maybe that 300 sq ft I'm looking for. I've thought it would be really kind of fun to buy both--and have the little cabin as my office/"she-cave". And the two houses together would only be 3/4s what I would probably get from the sale of my house in NJ. BUT it would double up on the land we would have to maintain as well as doubling up on taxes, so it probably wouldn't be very smart.

    We'll just keep exploring our options.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  7. #37
    Senior Member Geila's Avatar
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    Catherine and nswef - I'm glad you enjoyed the article.

    Recently, we have converted our two extra bedrooms into his and hers offices. Mine also has a sewing table and dh's has a twin bed for naps. We've been enjoying making better use of our space but I've been thinking that this is how it starts. We've always said that 1400 sqft is too big for us. Ideally, we would like 850-1000 sq ft. But now that we have all this space for our private use, it's really nice!

    But I wonder if we looked at space similarly to how we look at material things if our outlook would change.

    Between us and MIL (not biological, maybe I should use CL's term of heart MIL), we own appx 2 million in real estate equity. Our inlaws have a big house and a 10 acre country place (which they rarely use nowadays) and we have our house. Can you imagine if we combined households how rich we would be? Four people could easily live in one house. But we don't, instead we maintain three separate residences, we pay taxes and utilities for 3 households... etc. Our consumption and luxury of space comes at a pretty high price.

    The other day I was thinking about this and if given the choice, would we be willing to cohabit in order to be financially set for life? Dh would never have to commute another day in his life. Or work 14 day stretches or 12 hour days. (He's salaried).

    Given the recent issue with me and visitors, I don't know. Athough I know from past experience that there can be some very positive cohabiting relationships. I had roommates for years to help with the mortgage and established some wonderful friendships along the way.

    Anywho.... just random musings. No particular point to make.

  8. #38
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    I would not want to live with anyone but DH at this age. My office is also the guest room and DH's an office. It is nice for each of us to have our own space.

  9. #39
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    I would not want to live with family either but many do make it work very well. A friend recently moved into her parents home because her mom needed support to help her dad who needed extra care. They modified her parents home to make the families cohabit with space. They sold their house to their daughter and her family who wanted that location. Friend left her horses at the old place and now rides with her daughter regularly. Win win win.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  10. #40
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    As far as the original question goes, as an atheist, I don't think we come with a built-in purpose. I do believe that finding a purpose for ourselves will generally make for a more fulfilling life though.
    On the co-housing question, I actually love the idea of co-housing, but only with the appropriate housing to support it (and with the right people, of course). I'm thinking of a time-share resort where we vacationed once. Each of our two connecting units had a bedroom, bath, living room, and small kitchen. They were joined by a small hallway with doors from each unit that could be opened or closed.

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