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Thread: What's with all these sexual allegations coming to light?

  1. #11
    Williamsmith
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    These cases are investigated thouroughly, tried aggressively and defended robustly. In court, it’s usually a knock down drag out fight to the finish. Relationships are torn asunder, families split, careers can be made or broken and sentences for the convicted are long. Prisoners are not kind to sexual offenders.

    Every case has its merits or demerits.

    Let’s just pose a scenario: Three female siblings attend the same school....one confides in her teacher-her father as been molesting her for years. And her younger siblings are being molested too. The other siblings are resistant to divulging their personal hell but reluctantly they do. Mom is adamant. This is not happening. She says the older girl is rebelling against their discipline at home and accuses the teacher of encouraging a false accusation. Or perhaps mom realizes if the father is convicted, the family has no income and no way to support itself.

    The older girl sticks to her story and a foster home is found for her. The younger ones recant and remain in the home. A pricey defense attorney has to be hired. Imagine the turmoil this is going to cause in the family for life.

    Now imagine someone like CathyA and someone like Razz are on the same jury. There is likely going to be long deliberations in the jury room. As a juror you want to have concrete evidence that would prove beyond all doubt that the father was guilty. But the standard is a “reasonable doubt”. Now you get to decide if the prosecution has met its burden and know that your decision is going to impact someone greatly no matter what it is. No fun. No fun at all.

  2. #12
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    I once had a therapist tell me she thinks I was sexually assaulted when i was a toddler. I have no recall. I elected not to undergo hypnosis or regression therapy. I do know that my oldest brother attempted assault with one of my older sisters. The other older sister got him the hell away and threatened his life. This was the early 60s. This sister also thinks that he got to me.

    If it happened? Well, he is dead. Suicide back in 1994. I had long forgotten about all of this. Now it's back.

    For women and men and children who KNOW it happened? I am so very very sorry and cannot imagine their daily lives dealing with the trauma. For those who know it has NEVER happened, yea you!

    I find offensive the statement "girls dressing provocatively". This makes assault the victims' fault. "She MADE me do it".

    And the saddest thing of all? There are women in this country who make a living having sex. It' readily available everywhere and I grew up in tiny country town America. This is a crime of violence NOT of sex.

    It is a CRIME

  3. #13
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    Not specifically this topic, but any topic: It's takes over the news if there are enough reports to fill the gotcha slot on the page. I stopped hitting the news sites for a full week( now I only scan and read headlines once a day if that ), when I returned to the pages of the rag news sites I noticed Fox had replaced the slot which had the "teacher had relations with student" and there seem to be more than imaginable, with Sexual Allegations of everyone. Yesterday was Cory Feldman accusing Charlie Sheen, I shut the Mac and said enough!

    I care, I do, I feel for all involved the men and the women who should be believed. The "supposed" predator who should be believed till proven guilty.

  4. #14
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    I'm sure many, many women (myself included) have been grabbed, groped, propositioned, and worse without saying anything about it--it's such a common thing. it's usually just your word against theirs--not many of these creeps do their dirty work publicly, after all--and for many, it is about livelihood. if you speak out, you're considered a troublemaker, and blacklisted. I heard some female comics talking this morning about Louis CK--that everyone knew about him--one had been a recipient of his "attentions." That's how these guys work--they count on the silence of those around them.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    Thanks WS for your perspective. I was a social worker for 4 years working with kids that had been abused. Yes it was horrible what sexual things parents did to their kids. Occasionally it would be determined that the accusation was false and the Mom put the kid up to it in a custody/divorce fight. Ugh! Yes many men and women have been abused but it is wrong to automatically believe all victims. If I was on a jury I would be looking at the evidence.

  6. #16
    Senior Member bae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CathyA View Post
    It bothers me that so many women who were supposedly sexually assaulted many years ago, didn't say anything sooner. They were probably afraid they would ruin their careers. But that's not an excuse, is it?
    "An excuse"??? For what?

    Victims of sexual assault or harassment don't owe any duty of care to the rest of society - their needs and concerns come first. Laying a guilt trip on them, or requiring them to justify their actions in not-reporting, is a horrible thing to do.

    I help process sexual assault victims here in our community. We pull about 2 dozen rape kits a year. This results in about 0 (zero, none, nada) prosecutions each year. In a community of ~15,000 people. So, the 2 dozen kits are to people who are already outliers, and have decided to take the intrusive and traumatic step of the interview and examination. There are a lot more victims who simply elect to move on with their lives, and never say a word.

    I have been assaulted myself in the past, by people in positions of trust or authority. I almost never breathed a word of it to anyone, the world was not a safe space to pursue such actions, and the emotional, energy, and time commitment required seemed counterproductive to my life. Today, in my position of privilege and power, I'd have them dealt with harshly, but that wasn't really an option for me then.

  7. #17
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    Bae, why aren't there ever any prosecutions?

  8. #18
    Senior Member bae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
    Bae, why aren't there ever any prosecutions?
    While I'm not the Prosecutor, I've spoken to him about the matter, and I've observed the two trials we've had in the past few years. Basically, our legal system's standard of proof of "beyond a reasonable doubt" is very difficult to meet, and if it's a case of two people - the victim and the assailant - disagreeing about what happened, and there isn't other useful evidence, convictions won't happen. Add to that problem the issue that the victim may not want to cooperate with a prosecution, likely because of the emotional, time, and social burdens, and it's nearly impossible for him to get a jury to find someone guilty, if they follow the jury instructions.

    http://www.seattlepi.com/local/sound...sed-976387.php

    Many of the people who work up their courage to go through the rape interview process seem to be put off enough by that experience that they don't wish to go further.

    The rapes/assaults we have here don't tend to be the scary-movie-stranger-rape, they tend to be date rape/miscommunication/consent violation sort of things, or involve people in positions of power with folks younger than themselves.

    The last case we prosecuted here turned into a horrorshow for the whole community. It would make a movie script. Highlights - peoples' lives ruined, detective investigating the case seduced by the victim, deputy manufactures/covers-up evidence, and also messes up another case, disaster all around:

    http://www.islandsweekly.com/news/or...al-misconduct/

    http://www.islandssounder.com/news/i...p-with-victim/

    http://www.islandssounder.com/news/d...-of-rape-case/

  9. #19
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    What a mess! Being in a bigger town many of our cases are strangers so I am sure that makes it easier to prosecute.

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by bae View Post
    "An excuse"??? For what?

    Victims of sexual assault or harassment don't owe any duty of care to the rest of society - their needs and concerns come first. Laying a guilt trip on them, or requiring them to justify their actions in not-reporting, is a horrible thing to do.

    I have been assaulted myself in the past, by people in positions of trust or authority. .
    Thank you, I like how clearly you stated that a victim does not owe anything to anybody. These are very difficult crimes to prove, unlike on Law and Order SVU. Not everyone feels better sharing their story.

    My current work situation is one where I hear and am encouraged to do the ideal thing, go to an authority, trust them to help me make change, and walk out without more harm. Yup, not really trusting that. So I am working with understanding the 'new normal', building support systems that are not dependent on the people in charge, and watching for an opportunity. I have been harassed, marginalized, treated like crap, heck I am female in my 50's! Many more have had it worse, but the last thing we need is to put another burden on them to do what we want them to when we have not lived their experience.

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