Not me, but my boyfriend. He is going to be laid off from his IT job on January 15. He had an interview last Friday and found out today he did not get the position and I can tell it's really thrown him for a loop. He felt that he had done very well, studied up on a LOT of technical stuff; he looked great with a new suit-coat, tie, shoes and the works. He is a very affable guy who exhudes self-confidence but he just stopped by on the way home from work very sad with a hang-dog face, his confidence blown. I kind of thought all week he was putting too much stock into this first (of probably) many, interviews. I think he will be fighting the age-discrimination problem, as he is almost 59 years old.
Financially, his position scares me. He is a total spend-thrift, and I have benefited from his largess all year. He has no qualms about spending money and doesn't really save for a rainy day. Try as I might, a little of my frugality has rubbed off on him here and there, but he has a lifetime of terrible spending habits. He literally came from nothing and pretty much pulled himself up by the boot straps to get where he is today - he makes good money for New Mexico (around 60k), which is three times what I make but doesn't have much to show for it. Luckily he has very little debt, two paid-off cars but is just getting out from under a bankruptcy and foreclosure. He has about $40,000 in a cashed-in retirement fund which I fear he will blow through pretty fast if he doesn't get a job right away. Sure, he'll get unemployment but unless he reigns in the spending he is going to end up blowing through that emergency fund fast. He is also a Type 1 diabetic (among other ailments) and even with health insurance his medical needs are very, very expensive.
I am just trying to figure out how I can be supportive _ I already told him he is NOT buying my meals and drinks out anymore but he is the kind of guy that insists on paying for my stuff even when I give him money for my share. I think that is his part of feeling like a man taking care of his lady and unfortunately, after being so independent for so long, I have fallen into the trap of expecting his generosity cause on my own I would never be eating out this much and spending money on whatever.
It's hard for me to hold my tongue sometimes - I look to see where he could save money but not so sure if my advice will be taken offense to. If I were him, starting like a month ago when he found out about this layoff I would only eat out once per week, I'd cut the twice-monthly cleaning person out (he likes to help out the less fortunate in our tiny community by giving them little jobs), I'd cook all my own food (I do cook for him a lot in trade for being taken out to dinners). I'd get super-organized with shopping trips to Santa Fe for supplies to cut out unnecessary driving, I'd buy stuff in bulk at the big stores instead of running to the local (expensive) store for emergency provisions; I'd make frugality a game. He does NOT think like us though, so it will be interesting to see how he deals with it. He has been unemployed before though, so what do I know. I only know what I would do in this situation.
Right now he is at his house, allowing himself to feel sorry for himself (his words). I'm giving him his space tonight.