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Thread: Practical strategies to cope with being alone?

  1. #271
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rosarugosa View Post
    Oh come on! You were holding that one back as a zinger - and it was certainly a good one!
    Yeah, he can do comedy. He has gotta turn this show into humor otherwise he will cry.

  2. #272
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    Meditation has helped a lot. It made me realize that I can be happy while being alone. In the quiet of reading a book, or journaling. But being alone all the time can be hard too. You can try local meetups in your area.

  3. #273
    Senior Member bae's Avatar
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    This past week has been pretty much my first week of being alone for real. It's a work in progress :-)

  4. #274
    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bae View Post
    This past week has been pretty much my first week of being alone for real. It's a work in progress :-)
    To appropriate a phrase from another status, "It gets better."
    If Americans expended even a fraction of the energy on civic engagement that we spend on consumer ideology, our democracy would be much healthier. Can you imagine people camping out to vote? -- Charles Roberts, Amherst, Mass., Nov. 25, 2006

  5. #275
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    I'm fortunate; I spent my formative years as an only child. I learned to love solitude roaming the fields and dunes as a junior naturalist. I require little companionship. Although I wouldn't mind a little more than I have now, I'm pretty happy entertaining myself. Right now I'm watching the neighborhood birds make drunken fools of themselves diving at Madrona berries in the sunlight.

  6. #276
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Last night I went to a long happy hour as two colleagues were quitting and moving on.

    The happy hour ended up going until past 1am.

    But... some people brought their spouses or significant others.

    And I made what I consider an observation of note.

    If you don't have a partner but you want one, people look at you a certain way.

    If you do want a partner and you do indeed have one, then people look at you like you are worthy of having a partner.
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  7. #277
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    I have a dang cold today. Which sucks...

    And it sucks more because I am sweating it out alone.
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  8. #278
    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultralight View Post
    If you don't have a partner but you want one, people look at you a certain way.

    If you do want a partner and you do indeed have one, then people look at you like you are worthy of having a partner.
    I've long observed that myself. I met more potential girlfriends when I was with a girlfriend than I did when I was solo. Best I can figure it, being seen with a girlfriend means you must be an okay partner; if you're not, you're (at best) an unknown quantity. Not a complete theory, I know, but it happened enough to me to draw a line among the dots.
    If Americans expended even a fraction of the energy on civic engagement that we spend on consumer ideology, our democracy would be much healthier. Can you imagine people camping out to vote? -- Charles Roberts, Amherst, Mass., Nov. 25, 2006

  9. #279
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    I suspect it's just how people can react to what they perceive as failure at things they think should be perfectly achievable if one wants them. I mean if one fails at the impossible dream (to make it into pro-sports or to break into acting or something), people get that, as those goals were kind of beyond them to begin with, but at the commonplace .. If one really and truly doesn't want something it's not failure exactly (might in some cases be strange but that is a lesser stigma to just be seen as a weirdo than to be seen as a failure).
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

  10. #280
    Senior Member herbgeek's Avatar
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    Steve- another possibility: when you have a partner, you are being more yourself, relaxed and others can see that. When I've seen people alone (particularly in venues where there is alcohol), sometimes people can exude a more hungry/looking vibe which can also appear as needy. You get a better response to relaxed vs.needy.

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