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Thread: What are you reading 2018?

  1. #391
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Mr. Penumbra's 24-hour Bookstore, an audible book.

    Also, something about miracles* by Elizabeth Berg. I vaguely remember not liking Berg or the book I read by her, so not sure why I was in queue for this. Maybe my evil twin put this on hold.

    *Night of Miracles

    ETA: I had Berg confused with Elizabeth Gilbert. Sorry, Liz. Carry on.

  2. #392
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    I can see how you don't get gaslighting--You are probably ultra-certain of your own reality and not easily swayed. (At least that's how I see you). If your DH were gas lighting he would repeatedly tell you you that your irises and lilies could never compete with other people's. Maybe he'd be the kind of person jealous of your talent, so he would try to manipulate you into believing that you are a failure at raising irises and lilies so that you would be around to give him more attention. That's an example of gas lighting.

    Gaslighting isn't just lying, or just manipulating--it's coercion by getting people to doubt their own reality. Narcissists and charismatic personalities are very talented at achieving this.
    Yes, probably. People with healthy views of themselve, good self worth ideas, do not often succumb to the gaslighters I think. Still those of us who wish to live an honest life need to occasionally “check in” with oother members of society to check our worldview as factual, so if we have only gaslighters as contacts, I guess they would screw up our checkin process.

    If someone outside of the fancy tried to tell me that my iris and lilies wouldnt compete with those grown by other people I would think ”what the F do you know, buddy, you dont grow or show these things, your opinion has 0 validity.” Just like the opinions of my parents on the opposite side of the spectrum, they used to annoy me for being overly positive. My parents genuinely thought my work in several artistic areas was splendid! Yeah ok mom, thanks, but I know better.

    One of my cousins wrote a book about her abusive marriage and gaslighting was a large part of her relationship with that dickhead. But from the very beginnng it was a dance that she embraced. I suspect that had she had been in our circle of influence here in the Midwest rather than out thereon the East Coast, she would have had more reality checks to keep her from embracing the views of the controller/gaslighter.
    Last edited by iris lilies; 12-27-18 at 7:25pm.

  3. #393
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    I am thoroughly enjoying The Maisie Dobbs Series by Jacqueline Winspear. She's a psychologist and investigator in London. She was a nurse in France in 1915, the stories are in the 20s and 30s in London. They have some predictability, but the stories move quickly and immerse me in an unexplored area for me. I'm glad I discovered her so late so I can immerse myself in the 5 books of the series so far.

  4. #394
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    What is the ultimate goal of the gaslighter? To pump up hisown ego? To tamp down the enthsiasm for life of his victim? To manipulate the victim into taking actions he wants?

  5. #395
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    There are a few different motivations:

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/b...e-what-they-do

  6. #396
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    I loved the Masie Dobbs series as well. I requested that the local library purchase "Factfulness" by Hans Rosling. They did! I now have it to read. I really enjoyed his TED talks so looking forward to the book and the discussion with some friends.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  7. #397
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    What is the ultimate goal of the gaslighter? To pump up hisown ego? To tamp down the enthsiasm for life of his victim? To manipulate the victim into taking actions he wants?
    Really good YouTube by Inner Integration tells about narcissism and gaslighting.

  8. #398
    Senior Member Williamsmith's Avatar
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    I’m not sure how I’d not read this book before. A recent trip to the local Salvation Army yielded me two interesting finds:
    A Teac AG V3050 surround sound receiver for $7.99 and Rand Paul’s “Taking A Stand” circa 2015 for $2.70.

    Maybe some people are still of the notion I am a Trump supporter. Depends on what he is doing at the time. With respect to Rand Paul, I pretty much support him ...period. I’m for a smaller Federal government, a fourth amendment that isn’t trampled by the executive office and fiscal responsibility. The subtitle to Paul’s book is ironically and quite appropriately “ Moving Beyond Partisan Politics to Unite America.”

  9. #399
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    The Other Wes Moore about two Baltimoreans with the same name who take different paths in life. It is nonfiction.

  10. #400
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    I am currently reading The Witch Elm by Tana French. I still have a ways to go and will comment again when I'm done, but it does remind me a little bit of The Goldfinch, so IL, you may wish to check it out. It certainly isn't just like it of course, but I do see some similarities. I do tend to like Tana French.

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