Geila, I really enjoyed Less too.
Really enjoyed The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. Also, been reading a number of books on Gaslighting. The best so far is Gaslighting by Sarkis, Stephanie. It is something everyone should read IMO. It is shocking behavior. A person does not even know it is going on. Turns out my MIL was also a covert narcissist too. After being told about this, I see this behavior in a few other people I know.
These Truths, a sprawling history of the United States.
Still working my way through Empire of the Summer Moon - wow...what short, brutal lives our pioneer ancestors lived.
Also reading Heartland which explains some of the reasons we see so many broken people nowadays.
One of my pioneer ancestors died during the journey--of cholera, I think--and was buried near the Barlow Trail. At least she made it to Oregon...
I'm reading Into the Gray Zone, by Adrian Owen, an exploration of the space between life and death where comatose people dwell.
Confessions of a sociopath - 4 stars
Staring into the Sun - 5 stars
Yeah, thanks to whoever recommended Confessions of a Sociopath. I read it. This author’s brutal honesty is what makes this book unique. I don’t think there are any other writings by self identified sociopaths out there. The web forum she runs for sociopaths would be interesting reading if one wants more of this sort of thing.
It was interesting how she outlined her lack of fear and anxiety. She relates many stories of her life where she doesn’t have normal cautionary approach to activities. For instance, she lived in very cheap housing in very bad neighborhoods because she has no fear, and as a result she was able to get cheap accommodation. She drives quickly and forcefully taking risks often. She said she finally put away sharp kitchen knives because she cut herself too often, she simply was not careful.
In my 64 years of life, I cannot think of when I’ve been “gaslighted.” I don’t think I am clueless, and neither am I so sophisticated that these manipulators dont try me as a victim. I just have not had it happen, I guess.
I do know people who are liars, people who do not present the truth in all kinds of ways, and after figuring that out I stay away from them so maybe that’s my protection against “gaslighters. “
Different personalities can gaslight. I read about a situation that I had with my MIL years ago. I never liked her and now I know why. She was a covert narcissist that had gaslighting tendencies. An example... she kept asking us when we were going to have children? I finally had to tell her we weren't going to have any so she would leave me alone. THEN when we told her we were going to have a child she says to me "Don't ask me to babysit, I already raised my child!" WTF
I can see how you don't get gaslighting--You are probably ultra-certain of your own reality and not easily swayed. (At least that's how I see you). If your DH were gas lighting he would repeatedly tell you you that your irises and lilies could never compete with other people's. Maybe he'd be the kind of person jealous of your talent, so he would try to manipulate you into believing that you are a failure at raising irises and lilies so that you would be around to give him more attention. That's an example of gas lighting.
Gaslighting isn't just lying, or just manipulating--it's coercion by getting people to doubt their own reality. Narcissists and charismatic personalities are very talented at achieving this.
"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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