Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 25

Thread: "What the dying elderly told me"

  1. #1
    Senior Member pony mom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    NW NJ
    Posts
    1,159

    "What the dying elderly told me"

    Nothing we don't already know, but a video made by someone who spent a lot of time around people near the end of their lives, and what was really important to all of them:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1PLO3dk400

  2. #2
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Location
    Columbus, OH
    Posts
    8,718
    This video makes me think about how I have misspent so much of my life.
    I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  3. #3
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    4,917
    Interesting video. Anyone who has had a near-death experience will also have a somewhat similar sense of what the video is emphasizing - take hold of life and savour all the experiences, give of the heart, go outside your comfort zone in doing so and treasure each day valuing each person you meet.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    3,387
    I have had this view of life since my mid 30s when I lost both parents and my little brother to terminal illnesses over two years - observing their decline and sorrows about lives not lived and grievances held.

  5. #5
    Moderator Float On's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    By a lake in MO
    Posts
    4,472
    I've been visiting an elderly man from our church. He's in the hospital for the 3rd time this year. He lives for visits from people from the church, he likes to hold hands while talking and appreciates a prayer and kiss on his forehead.
    Float On: My "Happy Place" is on my little kayak in the coves of Table Rock Lake.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    408
    Will try to watch the entire clip, could not really as I am with my 88 year old father weekly. He has never once said anything that would be of advice such as the parts I have heard and read so much about during the time mom was in the end of life in the nursing home. There was so much to read there. Dad has never said "I wish" or "I miss" or any such messages. I wish just once he would say anything such as : I miss my wife, I miss swimming, I miss touching, I miss doing XY or Z. I so thought nearing the end Mom would reach out and give me some advice or thoughts...nothing. Actually she was so angry and rightly so of being moved to the home that she told Dad she wished she had never married him. Never had they fought and that was the way it ended for them.

    What I have learned from Dad was the things I thought were just grumbling like Christmas Crap as he said that mom put up, was really how he always felt. How he said toss the cremated remains of my Aunt in the trash, well when we buried mom's remains he felt the same they are just ashes why take the time, that how I thought in the nearing of the years he would be sweeter and more accepting of others differences (think Archie Bunker) nope has never happened.

    I realized that those great deep thoughts or advices or memories did not happen like in the books. They were and are both loved by me, but in the end not much changed in how they acted or spoke.

  7. #7
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    12,934
    Biking lady, what you said is important because it illustrates how not all humans become beacons of wisdom at their advanced age.

    I am finding myself to be in the position of “elder“ in this neighborhood as I sit on the neighborhood board of directors. That is weird. I try to temper my opinion, say it once, and then shut TF up. They all will do what they are gonna do and it is all predictible.
    Last edited by iris lilies; 1-2-18 at 6:44pm.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    408
    Mom who was a nurse in the nursing home where she ended up used to say Some get sweeter ( men) and some get meaner (women). I think some stay as they always have been for better or worse.

    2018 is the year of me not offering help or knowledge from my ripe old age

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    5,359
    My Dad wanted to die because he had been sick and suffering for a long time. My Mom felt like she had a good, long life even though she would have preferred to keep living at 89. My good friend died very angry at 67 that he could not live to take care of his wife and that she had to go to a nursing home. He was very nasty the last 6 months of his life to everyone and that is really sad.

  10. #10
    Senior Member bae's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Offshore
    Posts
    7,197
    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    Interesting video. Anyone who has had a near-death experience will also have a somewhat similar sense of what the video is emphasizing - take hold of life and savour all the experiences, give of the heart, go outside your comfort zone in doing so and treasure each day valuing each person you meet.
    I nearly died ~14 years ago. I was in the 48F cold ocean water for about an hour, after a small sailboat I was on sunk between some of the islands here. Too far from any shore to swim and live. I was wearing shorts, a t-shirt, and a PFD, thank goodness.

    Reaffirmed my desire to live each day fully, once someone had fished me out and warmed me up.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •