Rosa, we made similar suggestions to my parents for years, urging them to make a bedroom out of the back parlor and expand the downstairs bathroom. They reacted much as your mil.
They are now in assisted living due to Dad's falls and mom's dementia. They did get to live at home for 5 more years than made any sense for them, and that is what they wanted. We did not have a family member living with them; they did not want that.
I guess my advice, not that you asked for it, lol, is that sometimes parents will do what they will do and nothing reasonable you say will help stave off a bad situation. On the other hand, they lived as they wanted for much longer than they should have, so I suppose in the long run their stubbornness was rewarded somewhat.
Your mil might be much better off in assisted living, given the dynamics of the family and the nature of the house. Maybe you could take her to look at some nice places, and she might surprise you. Or maybe not.
I just am learning it is a true al anon situation--you did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it. You can just do the best you can and roll with whatever happens.
A personal experience: towards the end of her life we had my Mom evaluated by the state Medicaid office for eligibility for the nursing home. By then her series of small strokes had clouded her brain (although dementia was not formally diagnosed) and she was telling the nurse/intake worker who visited her at home things like "we didn't give her any food." Fortunately I was there and pointed out the dirty dishes in the sink from the breakfast that my Mom had just eaten.
Point is, I can see where caregivers might be accused of things based on the word of an already mentally compromised family member, so getting an objective evaluation from a medical doctor on the record can be important to have early on.
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