Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 33

Thread: Who do you call

  1. #21
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,591
    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    Oh agreed, I have assumed that when ZG uses “support” here that is a general term for the more specific requests she has made to her supervisor. Several times she mentioned needing clarification of the payment process by parents. If someone just asked me for “ support” that literal thing, I would dismiss them as a lot of trouble.

    mrschris has an interesting and possibly true point. Very weak supervisors are uncomfortable not having answers, and if that causes them self embarrassment, they may just eliminate the source of the embarrassment.
    That is interesting IL, How would you want someone to ask about things like the payment process for parents? I have never done it before and I need to learn. It seemed more tangible and effective than other types of things like emotional support. I am not asking a supervisor to listen to me rant or provide emotional type support, but either train me or send me to someone who can on parent payments that is something I really need.

    Other things I have asked for as support are to miss or makeup a meeting so that I could interview a candidate when I was short staffed, a supervisor to read over a document and give feedback, and opportunities to work on my personal goals such as training staff. I really have no idea what others mean by support, I get the impression that many supervisors see support as advice. In our department they offer to watch us work or look over our task lists to tell us how to do things better.

  2. #22
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    2,272
    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe Girl View Post
    That is interesting IL, How would you want someone to ask about things like the payment process for parents? I have never done it before and I need to learn. It seemed more tangible and effective than other types of things like emotional support. I am not asking a supervisor to listen to me rant or provide emotional type support, but either train me or send me to someone who can on parent payments that is something I really need.

    Other things I have asked for as support are to miss or makeup a meeting so that I could interview a candidate when I was short staffed, a supervisor to read over a document and give feedback, and opportunities to work on my personal goals such as training staff. I really have no idea what others mean by support, I get the impression that many supervisors see support as advice. In our department they offer to watch us work or look over our task lists to tell us how to do things better.
    How about instead of "support" you use the language, "I need you to sign off on the x (requisition, voucher, grant request, etc.) that we agreed to in the meeting of 12/13" (you would be keeping notes of all impt. convos with him and typing them up and sending to him and stating, "this is what we agreed to today")

  3. #23
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,591
    I just got an email stating again that he TOLD me that I could not put in additional programming that was paid. But he told me HOW to charge parents on the 20th of December. transitioning to parent paid programming has been our goals for YEARS.

    I am either going to be okay or I am totally f**ing screwed here.

  4. #24
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    12,961
    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe Girl View Post
    That is interesting IL, How would you want someone to ask about things like the payment process for parents? I have never done it before and I need to learn. It seemed more tangible and effective than other types of things like emotional support. I am not asking a supervisor to listen to me rant or provide emotional type support, but either train me or send me to someone who can on parent payments that is something I really need.

    Other things I have asked for as support are to miss or makeup a meeting so that I could interview a candidate when I was short staffed, a supervisor to read over a document and give feedback, and opportunities to work on my personal goals such as training staff. I really have no idea what others mean by support, I get the impression that many supervisors see support as advice. In our department they offer to watch us work or look over our task lists to tell us how to do things better.
    I want you to ask “what is the payment process for parents?”

    I dont want you to say “I need support” on issue X.

    So maybe you already do this. In the second paragraph where you ask a supervisor to read over a document and make comments and also ask for specific training, that is fine because those are specific actions you are requesting, and they are reasonable and achieveable. But the first one “support” for missing or makeup a meeting—what does that mean? Should I as your supervisor gently coo reassuring words at you? Or, are you askng for a review of what took place at a meeting you had to miss? Hard to know.

    If the word “support” is never issued by my subordinates I would be happy.
    Last edited by iris lilies; 1-8-18 at 8:52pm.

  5. #25
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    4,922
    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe Girl View Post
    I just got an email stating again that he TOLD me that I could not put in additional programming that was paid. But he told me HOW to charge parents on the 20th of December. transitioning to parent paid programming has been our goals for YEARS.

    I am either going to be okay or I am totally f**ing screwed here.
    Simply state the facts as you see them via email. Parent paid programming has been the goal of your organization for years; on Dec 20, he advised you how to charge parents when doing so. State that at no point do you recall being advised in writing against doing so. Stick to facts, rinse and repeat as necessary. Have confidence in yourself!
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  6. #26
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,591
    Thank you razz, sat through meditation at the edge of tears all the time. Lots of feelings, bottom line students need to come first. And I didn't do anything wrong. Now just who to tell and how, and what to do next.

    Hey Iris, i am just using the word that they want us to use. I certainly wouldn't use it otherwise.

  7. #27
    Senior Member Tradd's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    The Suburban Midwest
    Posts
    3,042
    Goodness, I'm trying to decide who has the worst work situation, Zoe!

  8. #28
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,591
    Thanks tradd, sucks doesn't it. I realize that talking to people at meditation didn't help. They were very much in fix it mode when i just needed some softness or understanding. I didn't say much to anyone, but in a group of 10 where i am a leader it is obvious.one person just cheerfully said to get another job, she is an architect and yoga teacher, so lots of clear skills and earning potential. I feel as if i am so close to that deep black pit, i went down it before when i left my teaching job. So i know that leaving without a good job isn't going to work out. I ended up in bad places for a long time. Lots of fear, i just need to feel it instead of trying to fix it

    What is so hard is that in a feeling business where we do lots of sharing and caring he has broken deep trust. In the meeting that his sup sat in on she needed to add the human touch a couple times when it was getting to be too much for me. He just pushed on his agenda and repeated himself until i was almost in tears. He wouldn't give in any way, admit that he may have been part of a miscommunication or say he could see my point of view. And he so far seems to not care at all about the 48 kids signed up for programs he wants to cut.

  9. #29
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    4,922
    48 kids have signed up! Time to include his manager and ask for advice on how to handle it. Admit that you don't know.
    Again state the facts as you see them with detachment as much as possible and cc his manager this time. Organizations need the money and if parent-paid revenue generation based on long-term goals of the organization is being denied by a staff member, you need advice.

    Keep it simple and clear. Make it about the money.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  10. #30
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,591
    I texted him and asked when he would be at the main office this morning. I was up and dressed early just to go over. He is not going to be at the main office, there is some event today which I need to skip, not in any shape and will claim a legitimate migraine if needed. He said he would get back to me at one and understood the urgency. I replied that if any changes needed to be made I wanted to include his supervisor and that I would answer any additional questions as needed. We have had some parent paid ones like Girls on the Run and scout troops before, plus I have one class for 4 year olds that is parent paid because 4 yos are not on my grant so I was even able to do that under my previous grant.

    I need to do more work on fine tuning all the programming for next week, I guess I just go ahead but avoid parents. The last thing I need is to tell them something I can't follow through on. I am going in and then maybe working at my friend's site for part of the day.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •