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Thread: What Do You Love?

  1. #1
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    What Do You Love?

    Hi All,

    Last summer I had a total epiphany about my bureau, and I've been meaning to share it here and am just getting around to it today.

    As some of you know, I'm a borderline hoarder. All my life I've lived with a lot of clutter and had a lot of shame about it. Over the last 20 years (Gosh, it really has been that long, hasn't it?), this group has helped me deal with that and slowly, I've made a bit of progress.

    Last summer, in the midst of a "40 Hours of Decluttering" project, I read Marie Kondo's book and realized while I had thought a lot about getting rid of more stuff, I hadn't thought a lot about another big piece of advice she gave: keep only what you love. It made me realize that I'd spent most of my energy thinking about what I DIDN'T want in my living space (mess) but not about what I DID want.

    The other thing I realized last summer was that I was focusing a lot on tidying and improving the spaces in my house guests would see and focusing less on my bedroom and my daughter's bedroom. I decided to change that and really focus on making our two bedrooms really nice, pleasing spaces to be in since we are the only two people here 95% of the time, and I wanted to send a message to her that having a pleasing home isn't about "keeping up with the Joneses" but about self-care.

    I kind of didn't know where to start with my bedroom, but one source of stress was my bureau, which, ever since we moved into this house six years before, had mostly been covered with mounds of papers. I remembered as a kid my sister and I had had beautiful dresser scarves and jewelry boxes, and beautifully arranged dressers that were so pretty. I thought I wanted to have a dresser like that again. First, I just decluttered the dresser and put on it a jewelry box that I'd found years ago, but I realized I didn't really like it much. I then remembered a kind of jewelry tree a friend of mine had on her dresser that looked so pretty, and I had this revelation that I just wanted a pretty dresser scarf and a small red jewelry box (to bring out the red in the rug) with a lot of little compartments (which, I realized, was all I really need these days because the only jewelry I really wear often is earrings), and a few little trays and bowls for other things. I spent HOURS online on Etsy, on Amazon and other places looking for the right things, feeling guilty all the time, but after some trial and error (returning some things I bought, ordering others, etc.), I finally created a really lovely little space on my dresser to store the things I need there.

    It was a total revelation. I can't tell you what it was like in the morning to wake up to this pretty arrangements of objects I love instead of a mish-mash of clutter. At the risk of sounding "New Agey," I feel like this one change totally changed the energy in my whole house because it taught me I can create something beautiful in my own home and it will nourish me. Sometimes paper still collects there, but usually not for long because I really make it a priority to keep that space nice just for myself. I've attached a picture of it - not because it's so astoundingly gorgeous to anyone but me, but just to share the accomplishment!

    I'm wondering if any of the rest of you are thinking either about what you love in your home now or what you see around you (on Apartment Therapy? Or Pinterest?) that you love and want to create in your own home. Anybody else have "loves" they want to share?
    Attached Images Attached Images

  2. #2
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    I love my new viola.

    I love a turtle shell I found on my parents' farm, and a picture of all of us on the beach by our house, circa 1958.

    I love of lot of things in my house, but these come to mind first.

  3. #3
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    That is lovely, EJ! I love the jewelry tree, and the embroidered scarf, and it looks like the bureau itself is a wonderful piece as well, although I can only see a small bit of it in the picture. Are those oak leaves and acorns carved in the front? (Don't tell IL, lol, but I'm crazy about trees!)
    This reminds me a lot of us keeping my mom's table clear and lovely and delighting in the accomplishment.

  4. #4
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    Tybee, I can see why you'd love your viola ... I've been thinking about taking piano lessons (at age 51!) and part of it is the idea of just having a piano in the house.

    I love the rest of your list, too. Specific photos in my house come to mind for me too.

    Rosarugosa, thanks for your kind words. Yes, oak leaves and acorns - that dresser is a hand-me-down from my daughter's grandmother, who she looks just like, so it's special.

    Yes, I thought of your mother's table too. If I had one piece of advice for any hoarder now, it would be to pick one room or even just one corner of a room and make it something you love and maintain it as well as you can. It really creates some very powerful and much-needed positive energy.

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    Ej , what a lovely accomplishment and how great that it is STILL looking lovely for you!

  6. #6
    Senior Member herbgeek's Avatar
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    Anybody else have "loves" they want to share?
    I love my dining room. That's also my office (I am a remote worker). On the walls, I have a number of pictures in various mediums from my artist nephew at different points in his career. I have a picture from one of his mentors who did so much for him. I have a picture my Dad painted (perspective is all off because he's just starting), and one my grandmother did many years ago that shows a scene of her backyard from before I was born. I have one picture I picked up at an art show just because its beautiful.

    I have a china/curio cabinet with some collector cups and saucers edged in silver or gold given to me by my mother. They are beautiful, and tea is an interest I share with my mother. In that cabinet I also have some candlesticks my little brother made for me when he was 10 in my favorite color as a thank you for a weekend at my first apartment. There's also some hand painted wine glasses he made for me in his 20's, and a set of salt and pepper shakers the artist nephew made for me in college (his first sculpture).

    On the table I have some doilies I recently tatted, and some larger-than-tealight- candles I got from Ikea in stainless and glass. On the chairs I have all different but related prints in very bright colors with a poppy motif.

    I love this room, it reminds me of the people I love and colors that make me happy. When I'm having a crappy deal dealing with cranky people at work, I can look around and feel happier.

  7. #7
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    Nswef: thanks!

    herbgeek: I love your list! It sounds like you have an amazingly creative and loving family. How great to be surrounded by all those objects you have so many good associations with.

  8. #8
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by herbgeek View Post

    I love this room, it reminds me of the people I love and colors that make me happy. When I'm having a crappy deal dealing with cranky people at work, I can look around and feel happier.
    I feel that way about my living room. I love the "built-in" bookcase and cabinets I lucked into at a yard sale. They're solid wood and they cost me $30 and they fit PERFECTLY between my windows (I did have to shave off 1/4" of the sill). All they needed was a coat of paint.

    I love the secretary that was my great-aunt's.

    I love the engraving of the ancient family that my husband brought home when he had had too much to drink one night. He paid $100 in 1982 and we were in the crapper. I was furious.

    I love the beautiful undulating block print of a Vermont farm I bought from a local artist.

    I love the big vase that we commissioned from a Benedictine monk. We had admired one at the priory, and we asked him to make one for us. When we asked him when it would be done, he put his fingers to his lips and said, "This is fall. How about spring?" He definitely taught me a lesson about time and slowing down!

    I love the little Singer featherweight I use as a bookend. My great aunt taught me how to sew on it.

    I love the old deacon's bench that used to be in the sunroom of the house I grew up in.

    Those are a few of my favorite things. And that's just in the living room! As you said, herbgeek, (and I paraphrase):"When the dog bites, when the bee stings.."

    Nice thread!
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
    www.silententry.wordpress.com

  9. #9
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    Ejchase, your dresser is beautiful.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    I have always loved tiny flashlights. Very useful items!
    I also love key chain multi-tools. I use mine everyday.

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