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Thread: Update on friend's house

  1. #11
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    My words to her exactly: I realize this is a busy time of year, and you are under stress with your family situation and with work. We’re not trying to rush you. But when you feel the house is ready to be shown, we would love it if you would call or email and let us know so we can have a second look.

    I guess I'm an idiot because she never actually said she would call. She also said she had "no timetable" with getting new tenants in there.

    I'm not the only person who thinks her behavior at the funeral was a bit odd. I did run it by some friends and they think it's weird too.


  2. #12
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    I do feel a simple one-line email: "Hey, the place is ready if you want to see it again"
    would have been considerate and appropriate.


    Quote Originally Posted by herbgeek View Post
    Perhaps she thought you weren't really interested because you didn't come back to her and tell her you wanted it. Maybe she saw your face when you toured it. I also don't quite get why you are mad. Did you want her to bug you about the house knowing you weren't really interested before renting to someone else?

  3. #13
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    No, I had not decided not to rent from her. We would have given the place a second look, giving it and her the benefit of the doubt that it would have been cleaned up. I think she was somewhat victimized by her former tenant, unfortunately.

    She knew very well that we were interested.

    I think you are making a lot of assumptions about me, iris lilies. And it seems to ME that you like criticizing just about every post I make. I don't know why. But maybe you should stop reading mine. And what the heck do boundaries have to do with any of this?




    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    I am confused about what makes you mad. Without actually reading those old threads,
    I would have bet money that you had decided not to rent from her,
    before this funeral, so it isnt that it was important to you to rent this place. Do you think she should have called you anyway? If so, are you SURE she knew you were interested in this house?

    Are you expecting her to be overcome with grief and not be able to muster thoughts about anything other than her dead father? If so, that isnt realistic.

    OP It seems to me that you are easily upset by the actions of others and you like getting mad at them.

    That is ok, you do you, do what you enjoy. But this seems like a very odd thng to be mad at her about since you did NOT want this house. If you are getting mad at her on the behalf of her father,
    I would say consider the excellent idea �� of boundaries. This isnt your circus nor your monkeys.

  4. #14
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by frugalone View Post
    No, I had not decided not to rent from her. We would have given the place a second look, giving it and her the benefit of the doubt that it would have been cleaned up. I think she was somewhat victimized by her former tenant, unfortunately.
    ok, you said “I doubt we will rent it” and followed that by several reasons why it is not the place for you, so
    I assumed you would not rent it. Since your message to her indicated you might rent it, I agree that she should have flagged you the place was ready to inspect.

    I am curious to know what exactly is the the behaviour that your friend exhibited at her father’s funeral that you and your friends find odd.

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