meanwhile how do you sleep

[rosarugosa]

ZG: I am not bipolar, but I definitely have obsessive looping sometimes (that's a good name for it, I did not know) and the middle of the night is definitely prime time for that type of thing.

[rosarugosa]

Baldilocks: I am so sorry for all your stressful circumstances. I hope your son will be well.

[JaneV2.0]

It's weirdly comforting to me that so many people lie awake endlessly reviewing every mistake, misstep, and episode of bad judgment they've ever committed. Add in the usual accumulation of concerns we all have to think (or obsess) about, and it's a wonder any of us sleep. (I suspect in its more extreme form it's symptomatic of depression.) I call it the Worry Wheel.

You'll get through this, Zoe Girl; it's just another bump in the road.

[pinkytoe]

Another obsessive looper here though it's much better since retiring. I also find it very helpful to get outside every day, read inspirational books and remind myself to get over myself. Imagine if we lived as some primitive cultures did where there was no I, only we.

[Zoe Girl]

Well this sucks, thinking it is not going to get better as I get older or retire. I would have a hard time living like this for a long time.

[mschrisgo2]

Just one example of job prospects after 50... I left classroom teaching at age 54 and went to work for a private tutoring company- not as well paid, but also almost no work stress. (think- no interactions/conferences with parents, no unreasonable admins, no report cards, on site paid lesson planning time, 8-5 Mon-Friday, done, no infringement on my personal time). After 10 years, I applied for a classroom teaching position at my favorite grade level in public school, got it, and worked happily for 3 years, having just retired this past June, now with comfortable retirement pay and benefits. I qualify for Medicare with all of my years working in private industry, plus I have teacher's pension.

There are several others in our retired teachers group with very similar stories. There are teacher shortages almost every where, and the shortage is not going to get better any time soon. I guess my point is that there are options and people do land on their feet.

I sometimes wake up at night, but I spend that time spinning fantasies of travel and exploration and visiting friends who have moved far away, etc. I used to ruminate over the "bad" things- until someone told me, "If you're going to make up stories, they might as well be good ones!"

[Baldilocks]

Baldilocks: I am so sorry for all your stressful circumstances. I hope your son will be well.

Thank you. We are resilient if nothing else. Tomorrow we go to one of the best hospitals in the area (University of Chicago Medical center) for his treatment plan. Either tomorrow afternoon or Friday morning they start on the sewer and the sewer insurance pays all but the deductible. And on a more positive note, all the stress is helping with my weight loss. I consider myself a recovering pessimist. You can't be hopeless (pessimistic) and offer a message of hope. I debated about sharing, and didn't want to hijack the thread. I just wanted to show that there is hope in the midst of the storm.

[rosarugosa]

I'm glad you shared, Baldilocks. We like to support each other through the bad stuff as well as cheer each other on through the good stuff. It's nice to be near a major medical hub when someone you love has a serious medical condition.

[Zoe Girl]

Just one example of job prospects after 50... I left classroom teaching at age 54 and went to work for a private tutoring company- not as well paid, but also almost no work stress. (think- no interactions/conferences with parents, no unreasonable admins, no report cards, on site paid lesson planning time, 8-5 Mon-Friday, done, no infringement on my personal time). After 10 years, I applied for a classroom teaching position at my favorite grade level in public school, got it, and worked happily for 3 years, having just retired this past June, now with comfortable retirement pay and benefits. I qualify for Medicare with all of my years working in private industry, plus I have teacher's pension.

There are several others in our retired teachers group with very similar stories. There are teacher shortages almost every where, and the shortage is not going to get better any time soon. I guess my point is that there are options and people do land on their feet.

I sometimes wake up at night, but I spend that time spinning fantasies of travel and exploration and visiting friends who have moved far away, etc. I used to ruminate over the "bad" things- until someone told me, "If you're going to make up stories, they might as well be good ones!"

oh thank you! Very much what i needed to hear