I actually have a good one, I can only have 5 EAP sessions with him however. We worked on a few things, even as the mindfulness facilitator I am still prone to forgetting what to do without help. Then I realize I recognize what he is asking me to do.

He is going to give me some resources, he is recommending that I continue with some type of therapy based on my history with my ex-husband. I said maybe it was something like PTSD since I am having memories and mostly body memories of what things felt like back then, he said it is just regular trauma including PTSD if I am having intrusive memories and the 'time slipping' I described. That feels validating in a way.

I am supposed to do nice things for myself today, which is good because even though I have a long list of things to do I can only function on the most routine tasks. Anything else has me so nervous I might do it wrong that it is super difficult. If I have to do these things at least I have been tolerating the anxiety medications well.

I am adapting the baby doll crochet pattern to have arms that are more solidly attached than just sewn on. We will see