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Thread: Would you lie to preserve your money?

  1. #21
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    The problem with children receiving Social Security is that it is not a universal benefit, their father or mother had to pay into the system some amount or Quarters.

    While I am sure these families use up a lot more $$$ than they paid in, at least something was paid in. It is a fairly middle class benefit.

    I wonder a lot about all of the fatherless kids in our nearby ‘hood who lose fathers due to gun violence. I doubt they get much or any of a gubmnt benefit thru Social Security because their fathers did nothing to pay into the system. And secondarily, their parents were not married, but I dont know how this latter status affect soc security draw for orphans.

    Teacher Terry has talked about this in the past but I forget details, maybe she will chime in.

  2. #22
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    IL, the parents don't have to be married but must prove who the bio Dad is which is usually done on the birth certificate. Minus that they could use DNA. I am not sure how many quarters has to be paid in to be eligible but amount of payment is based on how much $ the person earned. Nursing homes can't throw people out if they take Medicaid but they can transfer if they don't. This is something I checked before placing my friend because I knew their $ would run out. Her husband liquidated all their assets not taken by medical bills before dying. Once her level of care increased the monthly payment doubled. I have a problem with your friend if she is trying to leave $ to her kids. I think that is unethical. Not impoverishing a spouse is a different matter and I would do it to protect that spouse. Medicaid has a 5 year look back period. When my friend died there was a lot of paperwork involved and they had to be sent bank statements, tax returns, etc to prove that there was no $ hidden.

  3. #23
    Senior Member flowerseverywhere's Avatar
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    Teacherterry, so what is considered reasonable spending in the lookback? For instance our grandchildren we give cash gifts for their birthdays and Christmas for their 529’s instead of gifts. They have multiple aunts, uncles, siblings,cousins etc that give them gifts. Would that be looked at?

    my understanding of the Medicaid thing once you are in a home they can transfer you to another home, they can’t dump you in a hospital or on the street. Of course, the rules could vary by state

    Agsin, a wonderful financial discussion to have. So many great comments.

  4. #24
    Senior Member flowerseverywhere's Avatar
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    Iris, the social security issue you brought us is a good thing. But here is something to think about. If a kids parent dies who wasn’t working and contributing, they probably would not have contributed much anyway to their upbringing or university education.

  5. #25
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    What is this desire to leave $$ for the kids? If the kids have received $$$ for their education and they are presently employed and functioning adults, why is this not considered adequate support of the kids? To deny or negatively impact the wellbeing of the surviving parents in their later years to leave more for the kids is ridiculous, IMO.

    I don't have the issue of US healthcare costs but nursing homes here come with very minimal services and it costs a lot for the so-called extras which are really basic services and come out of one's savings. If one partner requires nursing home care, often the remaining partner is unable to afford to maintain the family home and it is sold. I would be very uncomfortable having one partner by whatever means take over all the assets to avoid paying the cost of nursing home services.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  6. #26
    Senior Member dmc's Avatar
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    We are moving my dad into a assisted living place soon. They are still working on his cottage. I figure he should have enough to make it to 95 or so, then he would have to rely on the VA, SS, and Medicare.

    Since he is a wartime veteran, he does qualify for additional funds if is assets get down to a certain point. I don’t plan on siphoning off any of his assets.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by flowerseverywhere View Post
    Iris, the social security issue you brought us is a good thing. But here is something to think about. If a kids parent dies who wasn’t working and contributing, they probably would not have contributed much anyway to their upbringing or university education.
    That partly depends on what you mean by “contribute”. My earnings amount to something like 98% of our family’s income, but I have no illusion of what a financial disaster my wife’s death would be. Replacing the services she performs would be extremely expensive, and we are insuring her life commensurately.

  8. #28
    Senior Member flowerseverywhere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LDAHL View Post
    That partly depends on what you mean by “contribute”. My earnings amount to something like 98% of our family’s income, but I have no illusion of what a financial disaster my wife’s death would be. Replacing the services she performs would be extremely expensive, and we are insuring her life commensurately.
    agree with you 100%. I was referring to Irislilly’s idea that a kid with an absentee or deadbeat dad who was not monetarily contributing or a presence in the Childs life would skew that Childs life towards poverty due to little or no SS beingnavailable, as opposed to my example, where two involved parents were shouldering the burden, each in their own way. DH and I Had term life until our kids were well along in college. The burden would have been great if either one of us had passed. By the time they were out of college we were very close to FI and that is a whole different scenario.

  9. #29
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    There are two types of disability - SSI and SSDI. One you have earned and includes dependent benefits, one is akin to welfare. My ex was on the latter, not having paid into the system enough years before being declared disabled, and no child benefit was paid by the government. The courts awarded me the grand sum of $10 a week in child support because he was low income. So IL, yes it is hard for the custodial parent in such cases, not to mention the courts said when he failed to pay the $10 a week the disability payments could not be garnished.

  10. #30
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    So, I was talking to a fellow at the food bank today (volunteer, not customer). He gets VA care and just got out of the hospital. He’s in his 80’s. He and his wife apparently have almost no assets because they sold their house to the kids cheaply when the real estate market crashed, helped put the grandkids through college, and now they pay the kids rent. You’d have to really trust your kids!

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