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Thread: restless dying

  1. #11
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneV2.0 View Post
    And some people react badly to morphine, or to the amount of morphine (or other sedative) they're given.
    I would take the hospice nurse's explanation with more than a little salt.
    That is true, morphine isnt a panecea for everyone.

  2. #12
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    .... Judging people while dying or for how they die seems so uncool, I realize it's not easy to witnesses it of course, so yea it sucks to witness a painful death.
    Oh sure, but people will talk about witnessing a death because it is a big deal, and it helps us understand a little of that big deal.

    over on the MMM site there was a discussin of witnessing deaths, and there were a couple of stories about people who died when the bedside sitter had stepped out of the room. There are several ideas about that, but one is that the dying person just didnt want others around for this Big Passing.

  3. #13
    Simpleton Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    over on the MMM site there was a discussin of witnessing deaths, and there were a couple of stories about people who died when the bedside sitter had stepped out of the room. There are several ideas about that, but one is that the dying person just didnt want others around for this Big Passing.
    When my MIL was in hospice, on her last day of life, my wife and I sat with her throughout the night and into the afternoon. At one point she was sleeping peacefully and we left for a 30 minute trip to pick up a late lunch. She died while we were gone. I'm convinced she waited till she was alone to pass.
    "Things should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler." ~ Albert Einstein

  4. #14
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan View Post
    When my MIL was in hospice, on her last day of life, my wife and I sat with her throughout the night and into the afternoon. At one point she was sleeping peacefully and we left for a 30 minute trip to pick up a late lunch. She died while we were gone. I'm convinced she waited till she was alone to pass.
    When we were pretty much on a "death watch" at my MIL's bedside, at one point, when all my kids were there, she popped right up in bed, alert and wide-awake. Then she spent about 15 minutes regaling us with her typical dry Scottish humor, complimenting each one of us in a different way, and making us laugh heartily. This was such a surprise, as she was very sick and medicated.

    When we left we thought she was having a resurgence and that maybe she would actually get better. As soon as we got home we got the call from the hospital that she was actively dying at that point--everything shutting down. She died shortly after.

    We believe she did that last "performance" for our benefit as a send-off totally befitting her. Then she died.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
    www.silententry.wordpress.com

  5. #15
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    Surprisingly, this is the first I've heard of someone waiting until they're alone to pass, but it's just what happened with my dad. We sat with him day and night for five days - at first we thought he was recovering from a head bump from falling and " sick" as opposed to "dying". Doc even said there was no reason he wouldn't recover. All of us took turns, and then one evening the nurse convinced us to go home and get some rest as he was in good hands. Twenty minutes after, the hospital called to say he's passed. Hmmmm.

  6. #16
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    My ex's grandmother was like this. He even flew out from California to visit and then finally had to go home, after he left then she died.

  7. #17
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe Girl View Post
    My ex's grandmother was like this. He even flew out from California to visit and then finally had to go home, after he left then she died.
    I wonder I this is similar to what they say about some animals, like dogs, who will not typically die in their own home--they go out to the woods or somewhere else to die. One of my dogs was very sick and we were going to take him to be euthanized the next day. Even though he could barely walk, he practically ran to the car when my DH asked him if he wanted to go for a ride. DH was simply trying to make him happy because the dog loved car rides, so his plan was to simply drive him around the neighborhood, but when he got back home 5-10 minutes later, the dog had died in the back seat.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  8. #18
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    Wow, Catherine!! We took our dog for a ride too when he needed to be euthanized. It really was heartbreaking on how happy he was to go for a ride. He did not die in the backseat however. He had cancer and could barely walk. There was NO choice.

  9. #19
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Zoe, my condolences on the death of your grandmother. Isnt is great that you all saw her so recently? Good show.

  10. #20
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    Zoe, my condolences on the death of your grandmother. Isnt is great that you all saw her so recently? Good show.
    And she lived a good, long life. I hope I can do as well!

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