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Thread: What about "Dexter Donuts?"

  1. #21
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    you don't have to be considered creepy or scary for something to be lethal to a career (ie lose a job), just not being likable is often sufficient.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

  2. #22
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    you don't have to be considered creepy or scary for something to be lethal to a career (ie lose a job), just not being likable is often sufficient.
    Come to think of it, a college kid I knew was fired from a construction crew because he liked to eat lunch by himself (and read), so maybe there's something to the idea.

  3. #23
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    I took a book with my lunch to my first nursing job and put those things in the break room. Another nurse loudly made fun of me to the others - “you think you’re gonna have time to READ?!?!?” Ha ha ha

    I read while I ate my lunch that day. We all got a 30 minute break so I don’t know why she thought it was a problem.

    But I never brought a book again. She was a ring leader and a bit of a bully at times - so I chose not to fight that battle.

  4. #24
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    you don't have to be considered creepy or scary for something to be lethal to a career (ie lose a job), just not being likable is often sufficient.
    Absolutely. And that fact was a huge factor in my quitting my job. When my boss made me fire a woman who was hired to be MY project manager. She had tried very hard to do all tasks asked of her and had improved greatly, but she was introverted and socially awkward. That was her only "sin" as far as I could see.

    So I quit. I hated the fact that I had to fire her basically because she didn't kiss my boss's you-know-what. I quit 30 minutes before firing her.

    As for the cubical swag, I have some of those quotes and stuff (see the pic), but since no one sees them except me in my home office, it's not for the benefit of constructing a false identify--at least I don't think so.

    IMG_4172.jpg
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  5. #25
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jp1 View Post
    No Dexter Donuts in my office because we don't have assigned desks. I suppose people could store them in lockers and bring them out every day but that would definitely turn them into countable possessions.
    Do you have a casual Friday? Also: Topics of discussion are also important Dexter Donuts.
    “I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  6. #26
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bae View Post
    For instance, I have too many chromosomes, and odd interests....
    That'll do it!
    “I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  7. #27
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    you don't have to be considered creepy or scary for something to be lethal to a career (ie lose a job), just not being likable is often sufficient.
    Yes, very true. I generally tend to be liked by about 75% of my coworkers. It is a roll of the dice though on whether or not that 75% includes the important people.

    I generally avoid and/or treat very politely the 25% that do not like me.

    But I will say I know that some of my bosses dislike me. And the way the bosses play musical chairs at my work (6 different bosses in 3.5 years because of various demotions and promotions) it is hard to keep dime-dancing the steps they each want. haha

    I have found that I can milk several things to get my colleagues to like me:
    -I cover for them and do some of their work voluntarily when they are out sick
    -I employ my slightly above average sense of humor by making them laugh
    -I say 2 supportive things in each meeting and otherwise stay quiet (I keep track of this on my notepad of paper)
    -I avoid talking about any of my more "interesting" interests
    -I bring my dog to work from time to time because he is a cutie and a real charmer.
    “I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand." -- Rodney Dangerfield

  8. #28
    Senior Member KayLR's Avatar
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    To me they would count if you would feel something missing if you didn't have them. These things seem to mean something to you. The ol' "does it spark joy" thing.
    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already!

  9. #29
    Senior Member jp1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultralight View Post
    Do you have a casual Friday? Also: Topics of discussion are also important Dexter Donuts.
    We have ‘dress your day’ everyday. Basically it means that we’re still expected to dress professional if we have outside meetings but if we’re just going to be sitting in the office all day we can wear pretty much whatever.

  10. #30
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    Ahh working relationships. I have an absolutely terrible office this year, I am down to one Dr Seuss poster and piles of recycled materials and program boxes. I can also hear the music room all day every day. I often take my cell phone outside to talk. The building is simply too full this year, but cuts next year should give me a better space. So I don't personalize a lot, but the other people in the building are not officially my colleagues. My colleagues seem to like me because I help out whenever I can, especially if they are trying to learn something. I haven't had much chance to do that this year, we are in regions that spend little time outside of our groups.

    I earned a lot of goodwill at one job in college by not liking football. I always offered to work the rec center job when there was a football or other game. It was super slow and so I could study a lot. My co workers loved not battling to get the day off also.

    I don't tend to get along with people above me, at least the first year I work with them. After awhile they learn I really know my stuff and can make their lives easier. In general I work really hard at it but it is a challenge. I always want to be part of a solution but about half the time it goes over badly and I am seen as having a pushy attitude. This year is the first time I have very much felt that if I said the same things with the same tone as a male I would be better off but it is not the greatest as a female.

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