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Thread: Does spending ever cause you guilt?

  1. #11
    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gimmethesimplelife View Post
    guilt for spending on something I don't absolutely need
    So, seriously, when does the guilt stop? When you are down to one pair of underwear you wash nightly so you can wear it the next day with your one shirt and one pair of pants? Do you rue the day you bought oatmeal with sugar and cinnamon already in it instead of the plain variety? Will you reduce posting on SLF because you no longer have Internet access unless you're sitting behind one of those communal-use PCs at the library? If you return the watch, will you give the $69 to someone in "the 85006" whom you deem to have less than you do -- and hope they don't spend it on a watch?

    If, as others implied, you were spending money on a watch when you should have been spending it on food for your dog or cat or on gasoline to get to work, then you should feel guilty that you're not meeting obligations you've already made to others. If you didn't, however, is $69 spent on a useful well-built watch really more frivolous a purchase than anything else you can buy?
    Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. - Booker T. Washington

  2. #12
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    Guilt? Nope. We own our primary home and a cabin in the mountains. No mortgages. Saved $ for 17y to buy the car of my dreams.

    We support multiple local organizations monthly and have for many many years.

    We worked damn hard and are very responsible with our income.

    I don't understand having guilt over a $69 purchase?

  3. #13
    Senior Member gimmethesimplelife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SteveinMN View Post
    So, seriously, when does the guilt stop? When you are down to one pair of underwear you wash nightly so you can wear it the next day with your one shirt and one pair of pants? Do you rue the day you bought oatmeal with sugar and cinnamon already in it instead of the plain variety? Will you reduce posting on SLF because you no longer have Internet access unless you're sitting behind one of those communal-use PCs at the library? If you return the watch, will you give the $69 to someone in "the 85006" whom you deem to have less than you do -- and hope they don't spend it on a watch?

    If, as others implied, you were spending money on a watch when you should have been spending it on food for your dog or cat or on gasoline to get to work, then you should feel guilty that you're not meeting obligations you've already made to others. If you didn't, however, is $69 spent on a useful well-built watch really more frivolous a purchase than anything else you can buy?
    Wow....Thank You SteveinMN…..I get your point and I agree with you - your post very much made sense to me. I will keep the watch, yes, and I will think over what you have posted at greater length. Thanks again for your thought-provoking post. And I agree - there comes a point where the guilt is ridiculous. Rob

  4. #14
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Yes. For example, I spent too much money in one exhibit I entered in last weekend’s flower show. I am embarassed to say how much! Ugh.

    But today, because that was still bugging me, I added up all costs of all 7 exhibits and came up with an average of $10 each, so that isnt so bad. And I reminded myself that my most beautiful entry in the design show was $0, big fat zero, because I used a container from my basement and flowers from my garden and the brilliance of my own mind, haha!

    There is always a little voice in my head that says “these competitions are about imagination and artistic talent. They are not about spending $$$ .” But sometimes ya gotta spend the money to get the results you want.

    I have these dialogs with myself all the time.

  5. #15
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gimmethesimplelife View Post
    ? Sorry, I don't understand your comment, Alan, but with all due respect, I will say the following. Be grateful that you can afford $69 for a similar watch or $69 for whatever it is that you prefer instead - many Americans can't afford this these days, basically so that the wealthy at the top can hoard yet even more wealth. And yes, I do find this very odd that the wealthy have to be this way at the expense of those who toil so that they (the wealthy) may hoard yet more wealth. ...
    I don't get the money hoarders--I spread mine around with wild abandon.

    We need to overhaul our system so that billionaires can't buy senators and congresspeople who are supposed to be representing all of us, and influence votes to take away services that make life better (or bearable) for the rest of us. I doubt that will happen in my lifetime.

  6. #16
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    IL, your artistic endeavours give you and others joy and positive pride in the power of creativity. I will fight with great vigour any attempt to make life an experience of self-flagellation or desperate poverty or denial of art of multiple forms. Yes, it costs money. Hoarding a work of art for purely personal enjoyment is questionable but sharing is a gift.
    As Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

  7. #17
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    I don't think it's a problem of where it stops, if you have your own inner compass. It's like "oh so you are buying a new shirt, where does it stop, when you have 1000 pairs of shirts?" Unless you are a shirt hoarder it usually doesn't actually work that way. Nor does it with a little guilt. Is guilt the most helpful emotion? Not really. And it's maybe a strong word, but it's the probably closest to how it feels.

    I think with watches most people do rely on cell phones to check the time, but if you don't do that for whatever reason and aren't around clocks etc.. Or is it just decoration? Well I own a few pieces of jewelry so I guess I can't judge some decoration.

    I understand shopping as compensation for working (hard) (at a job one no doubt dislikes) but .... it's not worth much really anyway ... not even as compensation really (it's kind of just a stress response one gets in irrespective of any real benefit). But sometimes I do buy things just because I like them too.
    Trees don't grow on money

  8. #18
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    Rob, for what it's worth, I feel guilty when I spend money but I think for me it is early conditioning by a very frugal mother.
    I saw a documentary about Holocaust survivors and one of the women talked about buying whatever she wants--jewelry, etc.--that if she wants something, she buys it, she was determined not to suffer anymore in life and if she wanted something, she would buy it. Here's a trailer to the movie, well worth you watching it:

    https://vimeo.com/57316737

  9. #19
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Rob, since I am pulled to asceticism (I wanted to be a nun for a while and Thomas Merton, Thoreau, and Diogenes are among my heroes), and since I do make a very decent living, I should probably say I feel guilty for buying things that others can't afford, but I have to say, I don't. As Jane said, I may be angry with myself for a foolish purchase, but I feel we are entitled to the fruits of our labor.

    A $69 watch is not a Rolex. You can afford it, it has utility for you, and so why not own it? If I think about one of my heroes, Dorothy Day, she used the proceeds of a sale of a book she wrote to purchase a little cottage on the shore in Staten Island. I don't ever remember reading that she felt angst about that purchase, and I've read all of her books and notes. But she dedicated her life to helping others less fortunate. And her cottage was not extravagant. Just like your watch isn't.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  10. #20
    Simpleton Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gimmethesimplelife View Post
    ? Sorry, I don't understand your comment, Alan.....
    I'm not big on conspicuous consumption but I do enjoy quality. About 30 years ago I bought my current (and only) watch, a Seiko I admired and gladly paid a couple hundred $'s for. It has served me well for all this time, remaining extremely accurate, maintains a timeless look and fits my wrist like a glove while being worn every single day.

    My brother has a different take on watches, he's probably gone through a dozen or so $30 Timex's during the same period. I'm not sure why America deemed him not worthy of a better watch at a lower long term cost, but I'm pretty sure he'd think I was crazy if I told him that was the case.
    "Things should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler." ~ Albert Einstein

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