That is interesting, her perceived idea that she would be considered a failure in comng to the US.
That isnt something I can relate to, the controlling aspect of The Relatives in
the Homeland although I can understand it. It is interesting that you and she allow them to control your behaviour to the extent you do.
As you know DH has similar circumstances to yours, his mother was Swiss, she came here after WWII. She often talked about retiring back “home” in Switzerland. She died before she seriously got to consider it and I dont know if she really would have done it. If her husband, DH’s father had died, I would not have been surprised if she moved back to her
Homeland. I CAN tell you she and the Swiss relatives do not consider her move to the USA a mistake, even if they think Switzerland a superior country. (For the record, they consider Austria to be an inferior country to their own! )
but who cares about Eurothoughts.
DH has cousins who moved to North America, both Canada and the USA for the opportunity. One cousin retired about age 50, towing his blonde American trophy wife and two tow headed children back to the Homeland after making his millions here. No one here or there thought less of him, we support him doing what he wants to do.
For that matter DH recently closed the book on getting a Swiss passport. He and his sister investigated that possibility and while it IS techncally possible, his lack of language skills seems to kill the deal. Had he got a Swiss passport we might have spent more time there but would never have considered any opinions of relatives there or here to be final determinants.