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Thread: Introverts, how much social contact can you tolerate?

  1. #11
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    well never even mind if one likes socializing or not, if one is working, doesn't this use up ALL their free time, well that and chores and for sure. Ugh.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

  2. #12
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    There is nothing wrong with your husband going to all of these things and you only going to some of these things.

  3. #13
    Senior Member gimmethesimplelife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tammy View Post
    There is nothing wrong with your husband going to all of these things and you only going to some of these things.
    Agreed 100%! Rob

  4. #14
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    ANM, when I was working f.t. we frequently entertained at our house. Sometimes having a sit down dinner for 20 people. Working and chores did not take all my time.

  5. #15
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    Teachers get out earlier in the day than people in other professions and also have summers and numerous other weeks and days off. You are not comparing apples to apples. I get 2 weeks off only per year, for instance.

  6. #16
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    I cannot say “how often” is too often, but I often stay home whrn DH goes out. He isnt much of an extrovert, but he does like seeing our friends, and all of his social contacts are here in our neighborhood, while so many of my social contacts are outside here now. So, I dont go to weekly coffe klatch down our street, but he does. I dont go to the card group’s events, while he does. It just occured to me that he has not been going to the bi weekly concerts in our neighborhood park and
    I stopped going to those more than a decade ago.
    Last edited by iris lilies; 7-29-18 at 8:29pm.

  7. #17
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    Ypp: I was NOT a teacher when I worked f.t. I worked for the state 8-5 with 2 weeks vacation. Teaching a university class is my retirement job. I would come home from work and cook or have it on a Saturday night.

  8. #18
    Senior Member HappyHiker's Avatar
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    Small groups of 1-4 are great for me. But I get over-stimulated with larger gatherings. Not sure I'm a true introvert, but I am a true highly-sensitive human who can't take much in the way of stimuli, noise, chaos. A cocktail party, mixer, or a rock concert does me in after a short period of time.
    Author of the green eco-thriller: Falling Through Time http://fallingthroughtime.com Editor of http://vibrantvillage.com

  9. #19
    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
    Ypp: I was NOT a teacher when I worked f.t. I worked for the state 8-5 with 2 weeks vacation. Teaching a university class is my retirement job. I would come home from work and cook or have it on a Saturday night.
    I don't understand how only teachers would have time for work, chores, and a social life. DW managed it with a daughter. XW and I both worked full-time jobs, sometimes on opposing shifts, and we managed it. It all comes down, I think, to wanting to do it. If you don't want to, the time doesn't appear.

    I don't think I could come up with a single number that's "too much". I know DW and I have set an informal limit of two "events" in any one weekend, be that dancing or dinner with friends or watching the grandkids. If we split up the commitments, we may choose to do more than that. But I am aware that (vacation aside) DW gets only two days off each week and several hours on one of those days typically is promised to her mother about 45 minutes away from here (social time, check-in, some errands). We try to leave Friday evenings sacrosanct because it's been the end of a long week for DW and, sometimes, for me. But if Friday night works best for a particular event, we try to leave either Saturday night or Sunday free for joint commitments. Really hard to say; I would not want to write a scheduling algorithm that emulated our choices!

    I will note that sometimes one-on-one events or events with just another couple or two are sometimes more taxing on us than much larger events, when we can take the opportunity to "disappear" for a while. And, of course, some people are harder to spend time with than others. lol We're pretty happy with our social lives. There are times we regret stuff we don't think we can make time to do -- and times we wish we weren't as busy as we are. It averages out.
    Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. - Booker T. Washington

  10. #20
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    You have to figure at least a 2 hour a day commute into any reasonably attainable job. It was an hour each way commute to my last job, 40-60 minutes each way for the one before that (and then there was all the times I was on call), and that's like the last 6 years. And I'm open to a longer commute now because I don't think I have much choice. But yea it's exhausting. No I didn't find time for anything much (yes of course gotta work), I felt crazy and overwhelmed ALL THE TIME, but what can one do. I didn't pressure myself with unattainable nonsense, it was enough to survive, get some exercise, cook fresh food, see my bf, and keep chores from completely falling apart.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

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