We recently crashed at my brother’s house during a flash flood. We had our dog with us, and fortunately had brought her crate. I think they were ok with it, they seemed happy enough to put us up.
We recently crashed at my brother’s house during a flash flood. We had our dog with us, and fortunately had brought her crate. I think they were ok with it, they seemed happy enough to put us up.
Somehow a flood is not quite the same as a "Here I am, put me up." when it was a planned trip.
Oh I know. And I support anyone saying no to guests who invite themselves.Originally Posted by nswef
Well call me the Queen of Hospitality, because we have a one-bedroom, one-bed house, and therefore no overnight guests ever. This has worked very well for us over the years. We never stay at anyone else's house either. That's what the hospitality industry is for.
Rogarusa, I completely understand. I find as I get older that it's gotten easier for me to put my own needs first. I'm less of a people pleaser. I like it that way.
Threads like this and others have made me aware that I tried so hard to have everything perfect for everyone driving myself and everyone else nuts. I am now stating my needs clearly. They are very simple really. I live simply with basic necessities and optional luxuries that may be curtailed at times as needed. I love my loved ones dearly but I won't go along to get along if I am uncomfortable, not anymore.
I am more comfortable in my own skin, have increased self-esteem, am calmer, feel freer and less defensive.
As Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”
I seem to be in the minority because I love guests with advance notice.
I think if someone invites themselves to stay with you on short notice it is absolutely fine to say no or, if you are willing to accommodate them, be very explicit about the limitations of your hospitality. Something like:
Would love to see you but I won't be available to let you in until after 6pm. If you need to get in before that I'll leave the key in [secret spot near door].
The sheets on the guest bed have not been slept in, but they have been on the bed for awhile. If you want fresh ones Ill give you some from the linen closet before bed time.
We have [pets] and they have been in that room, so if you are sensitive to pet fur let me know and Ill get the vacuum out for you.
I was planning [x] for dinner. We eat at 7. You are welcome to join us but we won't wait. I have y and z available for breakfast.
I need to leave by 10:30 tomorrow morning for an appointment. If you need to stay longer than that, you can return the key to [secret spot] when you leave. Please strip the sheets off the bed and throw in the laundry basket, and wash up any dishes you use for breakfast if you eat after we do.
If you are delayed for some reason please text me. I typically go to bed at 10:30pm, so please be sure to get here before then.
"Seek out habits that help you overcome fear or inertia. Destroy those that do the opposite." Seth Godin
My post has vanished? I am with you Lhamo......I don't change plans but I'll provide a BnB .
I found the list of conditions funny. I wouldn’t do that with my guests but then everyone that stays with us have been invited. Luckily we have no rude relatives or friends.
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