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Thread: side job dissapointment

  1. #1
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    side job dissapointment

    I went to the brunch meeting for this mindfulness non-profit start up and was not feeling great when I left. Each person got to introduce themselves and how they saw their role, I am apparently the environmental programs something or other. So pretty much the other people got a 'great you are so amazing' from the leader of this deal and I got a 'not sure how this is going to fit'. I didn't invite myself to this after all, and I thought she understood my background and focus. So I think she wants to bring in nature practice of mindfulness in a classroom setting and help corporate people have houseplants on their desk. I was clear before this that I saw this as getting outdoors, within the city or within 30 minutes of the city, making it a mindfulness program of short and slow hiking with times to practice in off the trail spaces. I even sent her a picture of where I hiked last week and she thought it was awesome. I understand that this will not be a primary program however the description she wrote for me included hiking and camping programs. I was going to offer a mindful hike in the next couple of weeks and invite people to experience what I am talking about, but I am not sure.

    I also had a lot to offer based on my last job, meeting data requirements, attending a conference on collective impact, staff training and facilitation training. Others in the room have some pretty great credentials so I just don't know if this is going to work. I am in a position that I don't want to push too hard for my own health, but someone really believing in me would make a world of difference.

    Meanwhile I love my job, I would really like a side income to support the slightly lower pay but I can do it. I really enjoy the kids and families and think my staff is great. So if this doesn't work it is okay. I have plenty of other things to do

  2. #2
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    I dont see now this mindfulness gig will generate real money for you. There might be a couple of outings you can lead and experience joy in doing so. And yay to that! But this thing you have in mind is a hobby, not a job. A start up non-profit for mindfullness activities will always be a struggling organization.

    I am also concerned that, with this post, you are going down your well trodden path of unhappiness because others are not respecting your contribution, not giving you the allocades you deserve, not giving you the focus you seem to so desperately need from them.

    So,let’s say you are right, what you have to offer is not all that popular or respected. So what? Really, SO WHAT? If you yourself get positive things from the hikes, why isnt that enough? And if you do not get positive things from the hikes, then stop doing them.

  3. #3
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    Thank you Iris, I needed a boot out of my mood. It is something I really don't want to keep doing. So I can keep hiking, I love it, maybe put it out sometimes if people from my Buddhist group would like to join in. I will follow up with an email to check in and let her and the group decide if what I feel like I am offering is something they want. Then it is a possible now and then activity, no big stress.

    The other people seemed to understand better but basically it is out of my hands.

  4. #4
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    ZG, just as an example, I was part of a group of 8 hiking the local trails. Now we are two who simply enjoy the walk, the exercise and conversation.

    I think a lot of people find hiking intimidating or too much. You don't which is wonderful but perhaps, could you discover a shared option where their interest actually lies. If you are willing to do so, you can develop something in the new direction using all your teaching skills.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  5. #5
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    I kinda figured that being in Colorado that hiking was the state sport! Based on how many people are now crowding the trails.

    I realized this which is actually a good thing, although it sounds kind of negative. I had a moment this afternoon where I thought to myself who am I fooling. Here I am trying to work with people who are on city councils, who have had their own business, own amazing houses in Colorado, while I am recovering from a breakdown, had a foreclosure and bankruptcy, rent a room in someone's basement for $500 a month. I mean what was I thinking.

    And then it passed, it was interesting to see that this thought has not come up before this, I have been really happy in my living space. I enjoyed raising my kids but am also appreciating that they are grown. I have time to spend doing what I really like often, hiking pretty much every weekend, teaching crochet and getting ready for Maker Faire. So 5 months into this adventure and it has been good, space to heal, the ability to leave a bad job because I can afford it. And if I have to push on this project I am really not into it. Too much for my mental health.

  6. #6
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    Are there hiking clubs? In the East we have Appalachian Mountain Club.

  7. #7
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    The life you are living now is what we all have wanted for you for a very long time!

    You now have simple living surroundings, your kids are off your back, you have time and money to explore hobbies and engage in new activites. This is a good place to be. You think it doesn't require skill to live in a room in someone’s basement? It is harder, and more interesting (to me) than existing in some big beautiful house. It is one version of The
    Vagabond Experience which always captures my imagination.

  8. #8
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    Sierra club for hiking in the West.

  9. #9
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    I'm fairly sure you have REI in Colorado. Take a look at their classes, workshops, etc. Some are outrageously expensive and many are free. Here in the SF bay Area they sometimes offer "mindful hiking." You will find like minded people, in all economic brackets. (don't let the disparities get you down.)

    [As an aside, I know someone who went to every single one of their Free activities for 6 months. Not only did she make friends, get more fit and have a wonderful time- but she found the man she ultimately married.]

  10. #10
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    I have no problem hiking alone, i do it all the time. I wanted to guide some people on how to do a meditation type hike. So instead of trying out hikes for other people i can do some hikes i wanted to challenge myself on.

    Thank you Iris for reminding me that this is where I wanted to be and I worked a long time to get here. I don't really care what people think of my lifestyle after all. I am letting this opportunity rest, I talked to a friend who pointed out how crappy it was that after sending me a job description she said in front of everyone that she was not sure how she saw me working in the plan (the movement person btw is not even a certified yoga teacher). So my friend and I agreed if the organization and situation have me feeling crappy in a way I have not been feeling then I need to see if I really want to join up. I really have not invested anything at this point.

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