I have enjoyed a few friendships with gay women. It was sort of nice knowing there were no hidden agendas around a romantic relationship...unless i missed something.
That is almost the subject of an entire thread, as it is a word full of connotations, insult, attempts to reclaim, activism, academic study, and debate.
In this case, I meant it in the senses of:
4. an identity that has been taken back as a word to be more inclusive, incorporating all of the LGBTQIA community (the queer community)
5. an identity used to be vague or non-specific about a person's sexual orientation, identifying with the LGBT community as a whole. Also a description of people's non-heterosexual sexual orientations in a non-specific and unbiased manner
6. an identity used because the terms gay, lesbian, or bisexual are not sufficient for their inner feelings
7. an identity used because some individuals whose gender or sex is non-conforming may not have an easy way to culturally identify their sexual orientation.
8. an academic word used in the context of “queer theory” and “queer studies.” The term queer replaces the term homosexual or LGBT.
And with a tinge of activism stirred in.
I have a friend who identifies as "genderqueer," apparently a non-binary descriptor, in line with bae's numbers 5 or 6 above. I don't really understand the distinction relative to them, but it's not my evaluation that counts.
If you want another recommendation I'd strongly suggest "Many Love: A Memoir of Polyamory and Finding Love(s)." Sophie (the author) is perhaps a bit more rough around the edges than the authors of The Ethical Slut, but there's so much heart and understanding in her writing. And she includes pictures she's drawn of her various boyfriends. They're adorable and add so much to the book...
Ah, they were, from the first source I grabbed so I wouldn't have to type much (I dislocated my elbow a few days back and am a one-handed typer at the moment):
1. something that is odd, different, strange or non-mainstream
2. a historical derogatory term against people who were homosexual (also see #9)
3. an identity in which Gay and Lesbian individuals have taken back so they could take the negativity away from the word and use it to say they were proud
And at the end was:
9. A contemporary derogatory term and insult used to describe someone in the LGBT community, usually by someone outside of the LGBT community, or used to describe any other person who you do not like based on their sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, general looks and/or behavior, or an insult to a non-LGBT person to control their behavior.
I was looking for a list of the different nuances. But as you know, there are entire books written on the topic these days. Thank goodness.
I've handed out a fair number of copies of this book:
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