I just got the official death certificate on my daughter; even though I knew what killed her (an overdose of heroin and Fentanyl), seeing spelled out in black & white on an official document is a fresh punch in the gut...
I always knew this was the way it would end, ever since I found out she had tried heroin at age 14 or so. When I found out then I had a very immediate and powerful premonition that she would die young from a drug overdose. I think I starting learning how to let her go from then on. I am very grateful that I got to see her develope into a very promising young woman. Unfortunately the dual-diagnoses of bi-polar and substance abuse was just too much for her to overcome, though she did put up a good fight by going to AA, NA and other treatment situations.
I wish I could go cry but it is Saturday in the gallery and I have to wait until later...