Another 40 Hours of Decluttering Using Flylady's Timer Method: Dec 2018 - Feb. 2019

[catherine]

It's great to finally reap the rewards! It's like that saying: How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

I've been getting rid of stuff but it all seems like a drop in the bucket. We're going to rent a dumpster this weekend for when 3 of my kids (well, 2 kids and 1 SO and 2 dogs) come to help out. I'm looking forward to giving quite a few things the old heave-ho!

I have to admit, as we pare down to fit 2100 sq. ft. of stuff into 700 sq ft, it's hard and stressful to choose the things that will continue on in the journey. I have to let some things go--things that have a story. Now I'm saying to DH, well, what if we buy up? (We have given consideration to moving to a more winter-friendly part of the island.). I don't think we will, but I keep thinking about all the things I'm now forced to give up and I'm grappling with all the "what ifs"--What if I wind up with room for some of my favorite things that I'm letting go of?

And at the same time, I see how BIL spent a ton of money storing things in a POD, and today he gave half of the contents to charity, and put another third of the furniture that he thought was SO valuable out on the curb. It's just like George Carlin said, "Have you noticed that their stuff is sh*t and your sh*t is stuff?" So when I was looking at the piles of BIL's cr*p all spread out on the driveway, I could in no way judge because I had only to look over his shoulder into my garage and view the piles of my own cr*p.

All in all, I'm happy that I'm putting myself in a position where my kids won't have to despair over cleaning out a 50-year old monument to our meaningless acquisitions when DH and I die, but it's still a lot of peeling off the bandaid one hair at a time.

[Teacher Terry]

Catherine, I haven’t downsized all at once like you are doing. We gradually moved to smaller places although we shed half our furniture with this last move. I have helped others do what you are doing. No one later missed anything. You will feel lighter.

[ejchase]

Thanks, everybody, for your kind words.

All in all, I'm happy that I'm putting myself in a position where my kids won't have to despair over cleaning out a 50-year old monument to our meaningless acquisitions when DH and I die, but it's still a lot of peeling off the bandaid one hair at a time.

As someone who *did* have to (help) clean out a very cluttered parent's home, I can testify that you're giving them a real gift.

But, frankly, I felt more sad than angry or resentful about my mother's stuff because I know the constant clutter stressed her out so much. She did deal with it in big pushes sometimes (and I tried to help her at the very end), but I'm sure it stressed her out to think about that being left for us to deal with.

I suspect, Catherine, whatever decisions you make about your next place, just making that decision very consciously and thoughtfully will make the next chapter of your life less stressful.

I haven't read the "death cleaning" book, but I think about that phrase a lot as I declutter. I'm 53 and hope I have a fair amount of time left, but no matter what, I want to be the one doing the emotional work of letting go of my stuff (literally and figuratively!). I think it's sort of a healthy process - letting go of old interests and priorities so I can focus on the most vital ones. I read somewhere once that life is a process of distillation, and that makes a lot of sense to me. There is some grieving involved ("Really? I really am going to give away that copy of Moby Dick because I know now I will never re-read it?"), but it seems like a healthy grieving - an acceptance of who I turned out to be and a letting go of all the other "me's" I experimented with.

1.5 more hours tonight. New total: 31.5.

[ejchase]

3 more hours tonight - a final push before my dad arrived. New total: 34.5.

[ejchase]

Though it was my intention to finish these 40 hours back in February, stuff happened. So now I'm trying to get them done by the end of the spring semester at the school where I teach. Did one more hour tonight. New total: 35.5.

[nswef]

You are almost there EJ. I am still writing- not every day but I'm pleased with my progress. As for the yard...working diligently but still lots more to do.

[ejchase]

I eked out another 30 minutes last Monday night when I was super-tired. New total: 36. Baby steps!

Nswef, I'm so impressed with all the writing you've done! Glad you're moving forward with the yard too.

[ejchase]

One more hour today on piles of paper. New total: 37.

[ejchase]

30 more minutes last Friday morning. New total: 37.5.

One thing I realized last week: when I started this 40 hours last December, my first priority was to deal with the clutter in my bedroom which had gotten pretty bad - I think about a fifth of the floor was covered with stacks of papers. When I resumed decluttering in the last couple of weeks, I had totally forgotten how bad it was. Now about 90% of that clutter is gone - there are just a couple of small stacks of clutter left, mostly in the corners, and I may be able to get rid of them entirely this week.

Having a decluttered bedroom just feels "normal" now, which is great. But it also feels good to remember how much progress I'm making because at times, all these decluttering hours feel endless. But the bottom line is, I like my home SO much more now since starting these batches of 40 hours two and a half years ago!

[Teacher Terry]

That’s great echase!