Officially annoyed with friend

[catherine]

He IS genuinely impaired but likely he would not test out impaired enough to take up group home resources, and besides, he probably wouldnt agree to it. Remember, he CAN drive. Amd shop for expensive cheeses. And get super high end haircuts. He knows how to identify the fine things in life.

I'm sorry for hijack #2, ZG, but I just have to add a P.S. to this issue. You're right, IL, he has a strange sense of financial priorities.

He has had a nagging dry cough for a few weeks now, and he's having trouble sleeping. So when I mentioned going to the doctor, he says, "Well, I won't be going to the ER." I simply asked why and said that HE LET HIS OBAMACARE LAPSE! Last summer! Because he simply didn't bother to open his mail. AND once he did realize his error, he could have signed on again during open enrollment, but he didn't do that either. Now he has to wait until November unless he decides to pay through the nose for transitional health insurance.

That Obamacare saved him thousands when he was hospitalized the last time. And when he was discharged, my DH had to drag him to CVS to pick up his antihypertension meds, which are dirt cheap anyway. He was afraid he wasn't going to be able to afford them, so he decided he wasn't even going to go to the pharmacy to see how much they were. So DH forced him to go, and they actually cost him ZERO. And now he has 100% exposure to being bankrupted if he has a medical emergency.

But at least he has nice hair.

[Tybee]

I'm sorry for hijack #2, ZG, but I just have to add a P.S. to this issue. You're right, IL, he has a strange sense of financial priorities.

He has had a nagging dry cough for a few weeks now, and he's having trouble sleeping. So when I mentioned going to the doctor, he says, "Well, I won't be going to the ER." I simply asked why and said that HE LET HIS OBAMACARE LAPSE! Last summer! Because he simply didn't bother to open his mail. AND once he did realize his error, he could have signed on again during open enrollment, but he didn't do that either. Now he has to wait until November unless he decides to pay through the nose for transitional health insurance.

That Obamacare saved him thousands when he was hospitalized the last time. And when he was discharged, my DH had to drag him to CVS to pick up his antihypertension meds, which are dirt cheap anyway. He was afraid he wasn't going to be able to afford them, so he decided he wasn't even going to go to the pharmacy how much they were. So DH forced him to go, and they actually cost him ZERO. And now he has 100% exposure to being bankrupted if he has a medical emergency.

But at least he has nice hair.

I think if I were he, I would look for a job to bring in income. Isn't he still in his 50's? There are jobs here in fast food now that are paying 11 dollars an hour and have benefits--at least I think they do! Also big box stores are hiring around here and have health benefits.

[catherine]

I think if I were he, I would look for a job to bring in income. Isn't he still in his 50's? There are jobs here in fast food now that are paying 11 dollars an hour and have benefits--at least I think they do! Also big box stores are hiring around here and have health benefits.

He's 56. I talked him into getting a full-time job at Lord & Taylor a year or so ago. I told him it would be the best financial move he could make, because of the benefits. He worked for a couple of months, hated it, and quit. He'd rather collect a pittance in unemployment than try to find something better than his cart boy job. He talks about going to a vocational school to learn a skill. Sounds like a good idea in theory, but he tried that once before and he didn't do well in school. I'm afraid he'll spend a lot of money on training to be something like a medical technician and then will be competing in the market with younger, smarter people.

Convenience stores around us are hiring all the time, but he's not interested. He has never learned that in life sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

[Teacher Terry]

Catherine, I have no words for what he did. I bet he won’t work until he’s broke. Wow I couldn’t deal with that.

[herbgeek]

He has never learned that in life sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

And that is unlikely to happen, until you sell your NJ house and he has to fend for himself.

[Teacher Terry]

If I was living with him I would be getting rid of stuff and moving at the speed of light)

[catherine]

And that is unlikely to happen, until you sell your NJ house and he has to fend for himself.

Absolutely.

I've already directed him to mobile home communities in Florida (and even one in California). He says he doesn't want to wait until his back is against a wall, but dollars to donuts, he will.

And he won't put his inheritance in a mutual fund, either. Even though I've told him that you can put money in mutual funds that aren't retirement accounts (he's afraid of a penalty if he has to withdraw it before 59.5--even though that doesn't have to be the case). So he parks it "under the mattress" as it were in a regular bank savings account. I figure he's had an opportunity cost of $4000 so far.

Honestly, he's nice guy, and very funny--great sense of humor, but even his mother said "he's hopeless."

[Teacher Terry]

I think he will try to move with you guys. If he is broke is your husband going to be able to leave him behind? You guys are in a tough spot. Although he created the situation it’s almost like you will either be the bad guy or continue to keep 2 homes. I am guessing you can’t retire without getting rid of jersey home. I almost wonder if you need to hire a professional to help you get rid of stuff on a timely basis.

[Tybee]

This probably a crazy idea, and I'm sure everyone will think so, but Catherine, what about something like this:

https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/mobile_type/220848644_zpid/0-60000_price/0-243_mp/globalrelevanceex_sort/46.976505,-70.098267,43.040791,-77.129517_rect/6_zm/?

It's lovely, in Colchester, 33000, with an HOA of 460 a month. Would that be doable, so he could be independent but still near family?

[Teacher Terry]

Tybee is that in Vermont by Catherine?