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Thread: friend in 'no contact'??

  1. #1
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    friend in 'no contact'??

    Argh, okay the friend that annoyed me (and it was just annoyance) has not answered or contacted me at all in about a week? I texted her last Tuesday because I was going to a meditation closer to her. She answered. Then I answered the next day. Meanwhile nothing, I know she is preparing for a surgery and serious decluttering. I did text one time to just see how she was doing and have had no response at all.

    So now I am at the point I would normally check in with any friend. However I think that would not be a good idea. Although I am concerned I am also tired of reaching out and being misunderstood that it somehow about my neediness.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    I would just let it go. The ball is in her court.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Simplemind's Avatar
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    Honestly, don't make this about you. Give her some space and reach out again after her surgery.

  4. #4
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Simplemind View Post
    Honestly, don't make this about you. Give her some space and reach out again after her surgery.

    Ditto.

    This is the same friend who got angry with you about not backing away when she had another health Issue, right? Granted, we here do not know details of the story, and you were undoubtedly of great help to her during her various illnesses and recoveries. You are a good friend!

    But concerns may be warrented of you trending up anxiety focusing on yourself as victim.

    Perhaps visit this with your mental health provider. And I may be all wet!

  5. #5
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    Thanks, i just needed to hear it. Not having anxiety but I did realize that the funeral for my cousin is Saturday. I am going to plan to drive to Colorado Springs that evening for my teacher's meditation group.

    You have a great memory IL. She is the same friend. I didn't back off last time because she had been in a mental ward for suicidal issues from long term untreated pain. And I did need a friend for something for myself at that time.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe Girl View Post
    Thanks, i just needed to hear it. Not having anxiety but I did realize that the funeral for my cousin is Saturday. I am going to plan to drive to Colorado Springs that evening for my teacher's meditation group.

    You have a great memory IL. She is the same friend. I didn't back off last time because she had been in a mental ward for suicidal issues from long term untreated pain. And I did need a friend for something for myself at that time.
    Zoe, I am glad you are able to make the trip to Colorado Springs. Sending you lots of support as it will be grueling but maybe there will be some small amount of closure and peace, too? You are doing the right thing.

  7. #7
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    Sending Hugs and support for your week Zoe.

    You have reached out, I have a sister that will stop answering
    if she just doesn't want to talk about health. See your concern
    but, you can't make someone talk if they don't want to or they are not up to it.
    Hugs.

  8. #8
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    She did call the other day,checked in with me. Talked about being overwhelmed and not feeling well. That is understood. We talked for awhile and she wanted to bring me something. I was not able to make time for that but it is okay. At the end of the conversation I told her that I worry about her and it is not okay to not answer my check in text for a week and a half.

    Funeral wasn't that bad, really good to go to Colorado Springs.

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