It may just be a holdover from the last job but i am getting anxious. I feel like my assistant has really made growth with his attitude with me, definite change. But I also feel like I am challenged to do this job well, and what will happen if I don't do well. The other day the supervisors came out to observe him and I was the one that didn't do as well. I had my staff that I worked very hard to bring up to a strong position subbed out to other sites, so we had 2 aides and maxed out numbers for kids. The supervisors noted to me before they left that no one was supporting him, and that I walked around in a way that was not supporting ratio. This is a big deal, and it just doesn't happen with subs that are aides. I have worked hard to create a supportive team, so when they are all subbed out it takes a huge effort. However there are really no excuses, this is my job. So I have said that he is negative to me but they didn't see the team including me support him.
So I am appropriatly anxious to some extent. Up to this point I have had praise for how well my site is running, however it is a real challenge at times. I feel like he is watching me and taking notes as much as I am watching him, and I am super anxious about it. Plus one of my younger staff adores him and would side with him in a moment.
Okay I may take an anxiety pill to sleep tonight, not anything I can do now about except keep doing a good job.