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Thread: Getting really anxious

  1. #1
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    Getting really anxious

    It may just be a holdover from the last job but i am getting anxious. I feel like my assistant has really made growth with his attitude with me, definite change. But I also feel like I am challenged to do this job well, and what will happen if I don't do well. The other day the supervisors came out to observe him and I was the one that didn't do as well. I had my staff that I worked very hard to bring up to a strong position subbed out to other sites, so we had 2 aides and maxed out numbers for kids. The supervisors noted to me before they left that no one was supporting him, and that I walked around in a way that was not supporting ratio. This is a big deal, and it just doesn't happen with subs that are aides. I have worked hard to create a supportive team, so when they are all subbed out it takes a huge effort. However there are really no excuses, this is my job. So I have said that he is negative to me but they didn't see the team including me support him.

    So I am appropriatly anxious to some extent. Up to this point I have had praise for how well my site is running, however it is a real challenge at times. I feel like he is watching me and taking notes as much as I am watching him, and I am super anxious about it. Plus one of my younger staff adores him and would side with him in a moment.

    Okay I may take an anxiety pill to sleep tonight, not anything I can do now about except keep doing a good job.

  2. #2
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    How long until you can retire?

  3. #3
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    Zoe, just sending supportive thoughts. There is no job without its ups and downs and yours is always stressful with so many kids and constant concerns. Do something that is relaxing and get a good night's sleep.

    No one is perfect. The children are fine. It is ok that they make suggestions for improvement and that is their job.

  4. #4
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    Thank you, I really love my job so that is good. I would be anxious about something in retirement also, I get anxious. I actually didn't realize it was anxiety for a long time, i don't know how, but i thought my sister was the anxious one.

    It is good to note that they need to look for areas of improvement every time they come out. All my other great visits haven't gone away because of a challenging day. I also think my over the top anxiety is a holdover from last year, I am seeing it as proof that my last workplace was right, that I was a terrible employee, and I deserved everything they did with me.

    It should be noted that I had made a social services call that morning and spent a lot of time talking to my director, teacher, social worker and parent about a behavior. Tends to be super stressful when I have to make calls

  5. #5
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    Try to separate the anxiety from everything else. Try to see anxiety like I see my allergies/asthma - a disease that I manage.

    When my asthma flares I don’t analyze my job and doubt myself. Try that approach with your anxiety - “this is a symptom of my illness. It is not an indication of anything about my job.” Then talk with your psychologist/therapist about managing your anxiety.

  6. #6
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    Tammy, what a good idea. It can be applied to so many other things. Anxiety can create doubt when there is nothing to really be concerned about.

  7. #7
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    Thank you Tammy, I may do some therapy sessions. I was doing well but my online counselor and I agreed I could return any time.

  8. #8
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    Self-talk can build resiliency. When your limbs first come to life as you wake up in the morning, what are your warmest affirmations?

    A great one is: "I am lovable and capable."

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