It's funny, the three roles described seem to line up really well with the three siblings in my family, at least how they see each other.Originally Posted by saguaro
I can't wait to relate to my siblings as pleasant acquaintances, with whom I have no business in common. We will see if love returns. Who knows.
I cannot see how anyone could possibly do business with ones family, if they are anything like mine.
The 3 roles line up with mine as well. The same thing with some cousins of mine.
I am seriously reevaluating my relationship with MS, right now I see her becoming a "pleasant acquaintance" at best depending if she can find it within herself to behave in the long run, to be quite honest. However the relationship with YS has become stronger in part because I stepped up to the special trustee role and showed how things can be done with genuine intent and transparency. The relationship between MS and YS remains broken: YS is done and MS will not take steps to mend anything insisting that it is up to YS "to call her". Whatever. I told both that the issues between them are between them, don't get me in the middle, I will not be a flying monkey for either. Things may improve, they may not, but I am preparing more for the latter and be pleasantly surprised if it turns out to be the former.
Same here. No way would I do it especially knowing what I know now. Taking on the special trustee role made me privy to a lot of what MS was really doing because she had to give me certain financial details especially when it came to closing the house sale. Let's just say there's a lot she did that would have gotten her in serious trouble had this issue gone to court. Among other things, not providing the accounting which was not just stated in the will and trust but also required by state law. I have it on good authority that she would not cooperate with her own attorney. I considered the estate handling to be a matter of business, so seeing how MS handled things is good warning of how she would be in any other arrangement.
I named those three sibling roles off the top of my head because they are so strongly personified in DH’s family.
DH is none of them so that kind of makes it easy.
I like all of his siblings, none of them are excessively difficult. But then, I’m not someone who takes on the problems of others, I am very objective about DH, his family interactions, etc. It’s just when it all impacts my economic life that’s when I figure it’s my business.
The executors of DH’s father’s estate are getting $40,000. Two of his siblings were the executors.
While that is a lot of money, i’m sure that’s allowed within the legal guidelines. I know their intent has been good to move the estate along and they wanted to close it a year after death, but so far it has been 18 months. The barriers to closing it have been virus lockdown and bad sister stalling.
I was actually relieved to hear that they’re allowed to be paid that much for the job executor because I think it’s a nasty job and I want to see people paid for it. That is relieved one of my concerns about my own trust in that I really want executors to be paid for their work and I don’t necessarily want to reward them with money from my estate. Right now as my estate trust is written up the executors are also inheritors but I don’t necessarily want it to be that way when I next revise it.
Back to DH’s situation– Executors have promise pd to put some of that money into the partnership draft/legal set up of the business. So that is a nice gesture on their part, and even if it’s only a little bit of the money it will be something.
I'm sorry, IL, this business sounds like such a bad idea. You don't have any liability from it in that you are married to DH, do you?
I would be screaming right now if my husband was going into business with his 6 siblings. It would be a NIGHTMARE and we'd get stuck paying the bills. (And never see any income from it.)
The liability is extremely low because the business is renting out farmland. They pay insurance. They set rent amount. They collect the rent. The real sticking point will be what if the rent is not paid?
Is this a done deal? As in you have to be supportive of it?
Agh. I would hate to be in business with my family. Just don't want my money anywhere near theirs. There is a property my mom owns that will be inherited by all of her kids, along with a cousin, or maybe more than one cousin. I am not looking forward to this at all.
It is not a done deal. I have already exerted all the influence I have, which is to talk up every point I can think of to DH about having his siblings buy him out. It ain’t gonna happen.
But as a result of this, I am taking a more active role in managing our joint assets and I will be requiring that he pay attention to my comfort level for risk. Generally our invested assets break down as he has exclusive control over 50%, I have exclusive control over 25%, and we have shared control over the other 25%. At least, I think that’s how it’s breaking down but I’ve got to check those numbers.
Since it's not yet a done deal, have him check out this thread about liability on rented farmland:
https://talk.newagtalk.com/forums/th...splayType=flat
Anyway, good for you in taking a more active role in managing your joint assets. Way to go!!!
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